DOSE:

oral

MDMA

(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

125 lb

I am an eighteen year old female. I tried ecstasy for the first time a few months ago, have done it 5 times since, and have loved it every time. I don’t have a lot of experience with drugs – I have only ever smoked pot (since age 14) and drank (since 15). This particular report is about my most intense and memorable experience with ecstasy so far.

It is 2:30pm on a hot summer’s day as I get off work and get on the bus to go downtown. I am anxious because I am meeting a dealer and my bus is running late. A guy I know gets on the bus and my mind is eased as we make friendly conversation. My next step is to get on the SkyTrain, but I have only taken it two times before when I was younger and can’t really remember how everything works. The guy from the bus gives me directions and soon I am on the SkyTrain, speeding towards an unfamiliar city.

I arrive at 4:20pm (20 minutes late) and meet my dealer (let’s call him J). I get in his car and he immediately hands me MDMA powder wrapped in toilet paper, all ready to parachute. We had decided earlier that I would test some out right then before I bought any (because the last E I bought from him didn’t work).

T+ 0:00 – I parachute what I’m guessing was anywhere between 200-400mg, although I stupidly didn’t look at how much was wrapped in the TP. Another thing to note is that I hadn’t been eating much for the past few weeks and consequently had recently dropped about 8 lbs.

We drive around until we find a Wendy’s, and he eats while I wait.

T+ 0:20 – I start getting the shivers, but it’s hard to tell if it’s because of the E or just because Wendy’s is highly air-conditioned.

T+ 0:40 – We leave Wendy’s and J searches for a gas station. I’m starting to have trouble concentrating on what’s going on and find myself gazing at the late afternoon sky, not really responding to whatever J is saying to me. I am thinking to myself, “okay so I'm feeling it, but it isn’t that intense. I probably didn’t take very much, I could totally go home after this and no one would be able to tell the difference.”

T+ 0:45 - I decide to buy $50 worth (because I assume that it’s good stuff, I just need to take a little more), and he drops me off back at the SkyTrain Station. I take a few steps away from the car, and it hits me. I am having difficulty walking because shudders of euphoria are shooting through my body. A grin is spreading across my face, and although I realize how absolutely retarded I must look, I couldn’t care less. I stumble towards the SkyTrain and suddenly have no idea which one to get on. There are only two, one going east and one going west, but I can’t for the life of me figure out which way I am trying to go. I have to ask three people before I decide to go west.

T+ 0:50 – I sit there on the SkyTrain, with my entire body shaking uncontrollably and my eyes flicking around so fast that I can hardly see. I try for several minutes to set my eyes still for long enough to see my reflection in the back of my ipod. When I finally do, I see that my pupils have swallowed my irises. And my face is meaningless and unfamiliar. This is definitely the highest I’ve ever been. I don’t know what to do with myself so I call a friend, Z. It feels good talking to someone although I can hardly communicate.

T+ 1:00 – After I hang up, it soon becomes apparent that I am only getting higher. This is about when I experience my 3 minutes of terror. The ecstasy is taking over my body and I can’t do anything about it. It switches from giving me unbelievable excitement and euphoria to overwhelming confusion and fear. My heart is pounding so fast that I can hardly sit up. I try to breathe because I believe that I will die if I don’t concentrate on breathing. My thoughts are getting less and less clear and my body is being pummelled by wave after wave of adrenaline. And the strangest part about this moment is that it is distinctly familiar, even though I have never experienced it before. It feels as if I am in a flashback to a past life, and even in terror, for a second I feel safer than I have ever felt before. Then the feeling ends and I am too overwhelmed to think about it any longer. (Sadly, this is a horrible explanation but it is the best I can do.)

(At this point I glance around the train and notice almost everyone is staring at me. Hmm.)

T+ 1:20 – Before I know it, I am at my stop. I wasn’t aware of time passing and am shocked that my mind-blowing SkyTrain trip has come to an end. I stagger out and up into the open air. I realize that there is no way I can go home now so instead I make my way to the beautiful sunny field in front of the Art Gallery and collapse into the grass. I am the most comfortable that I have ever been in my entire life. I lie there in the fading sun, call another friend, listen to music (mostly World, Hold On, on repeat), and stare at the blue sky streaked with thin clouds. I am in a state of pure ecstasy and I never want it to end.

T+ 2:00 – I finally drag myself away from the Art Gallery and get on a bus. I am definitely still rolling out of my brain. I start a conversation with a random guy because I honestly can’t help myself. He looks at me pretty weirdly so I explain that I am fucked on E. He decides that whatever I’m on, it looks incredible, and he gives me a good amount of chronic for a hit of my ecstasy.

T+ 2:40 – I get off the bus near my house and find my friends hanging around, so I just spend the rest of my high with them until I am sober enough to go home. By 8pm, I am completely exhausted and I collapse into bed.

When I wake up for work at 7:00 the next morning, my hands are still shaky as hell as I try and put on makeup. I notice that my mouth is all chewed up, nasty. I hadn’t even really been aware of any clenching the day before.

Overall it was an amazing experience. I can’t wait to experience that level of high again, especially in a party environment instead of alone on buses and SkyTrains. I believe ecstasy is an incredible drug, as long as one is careful not to overdo it.

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 64769
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Sep 27, 2019	Views: 640
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MDMA (3) : Public Space (Museum, Park, etc) (53), Hangover / Days After (46), Glowing Experiences (4), General (1)