Citation: Kat. "A Book to Destroy the World: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (20x extract) (exp65151)". Erowid.org. Jul 19, 2010. erowid.org/exp/65151
Insert alot of 20x salvia into bong. Put smoke into lungs while sitting on a couch. Go.
All of a sudden from behind the TV, it was like an already opened book was being closed one page at a time. Space very quickly filled up towards me with these complex 'layers' of pages turning anything the layers touched into a part of the book. Objects looked as if they were made of hundreds of layers. I sat for a few seconds trying to understand what was happening. I felt a pulsating pressure on my skin. As it increased, I had come to the conclusion that the world as I knew it was ending now. A huge anomaly was crawling it's way across the earth and it had just reached us, it was our time. As I looked at my friend the space around us appeared as if the layering pattern was now folding in, in a complex manner--turning him and myself into some part of a book frozen in time. In hindsight I understand that I created this idea of a book unfolding in response to the pulsing sensation on my skin and the layered pattern that started on the outside of my vision and moved to cover all my vision.
At that moment I stood up from the couch and decided I was going to try to save myself. I darted towards the enclave at our front door 6 feet to the right, spinning 360 degrees as I did this--trying to get away from being folded into this book. I clutched the wall, feeling as if I was safe for a second. I looked around in bewilderment at what was happening. I was on the outside edge of this thing crawling through our world--but I felt and saw it right in front of me, and it was turning me into layers slowly. I felt deep despair and feared the change that was happening.
I looked at my friend and he was just sitting on the couch, as if stuck in time unable to move as a victim of this book. Looking to my right, my other friend was standing very close to me and was still moving. I called out to him, 'come closer'. I was hoping that he could still move, the world was ending and I didn't want to be alone in time forever. I had given up, but at least someone would be close to me forever. As I came forward I noticed he was made completely out of layers and moving free within these layers around us. He said 'come over here'. I was shocked.
I assumed that my friend was a part of this spectacular destruction of the world because he wasn't terrified or shocked at what was happening. In fact, he beckoned me forward-- as if he was telling me to accept my destruction and be a part of the book. He came here to end my life. I retorted to him, 'So that's how it goes?'. And he replied, 'Yes. It is'. I was defeated. If he could conjure a book to destroy the world there was no point in resisting. I believe I put out my hand and said 'alright then', accepting my fate and stepping forward into the layers that were folding in.
Something happened at this point. I can't remember exactally what happened. I do remember that I was supposed to be on the couch. From what my friends tell me--trying to get there, I did another 360 degree spin and flung myself at the couch (again trying to get away from the pulsing feeling) but landed no where near it. In fact I landed on the ground as if it couch would have been there, my head hitting the exact corner of the coffee table. They struggled with me and lifted me onto the couch.
This is where my memory picks back up. I was sitting on the couch for two or three minutes feeling these three pulses a second going through my body. Just watching the layers of the world folding and turning in a complex pattern. I had come to the conclusion that this was my own personal hell. Something I had done had caused the end of the world. I was just going to sit here for eternity in pain. I started to think, 'What did I do to cause the end of the world?'. I retraced my steps in my mind back through what had just happened.
Slowly as I struggled to break free from this delirium I looked at the bong and realized that I had smoked something before this happened. Whatever my friend put into that bong for me to smoke caused the end of the world, 'that wicked person', I thought to myself. Something gave me the hope that I could undo the end of the world. I sat up on the couch. At this point I'm still trapped in this pulsating book, but my mind was feeling freer. I concluded that if I did everything in reverse that had lead up to me smoking that bong the world would be free--and I thought it was working because the salvia effects were wearing off. I didn't actually move from the couch but sat there for about 10 seconds reversing time in my mind. It was at that point I heard my friend asking 'Are you okay?'. He must have had to do it about three times.
Suddenly I broke free from the dillusion that everything was frozen in time as a book. 'What just happened?' I asked. 'Are you sure you want to know?', my friend asked as he chuckled, assuming that I would remember standing up and being laid down on the couch. Still being very effected by the salvia I demanded 'tell me what happened!'. He went through the fact that I jumped up and ran towards the door, franticly asking 'What is this? What's going on? What is this?' many times. As the salvia was leaving my system. I was speechless. I come back from eternal damnation. I've thought I died before while on salvia, also other dissociates. Those experiences were nothing compared to this one. I was so convinced what was happening was real. I can still picture it all vividly.
I'm just lucky that I decided not to put up a fight, otherwise I might have had the misfortune of being restrained while tripping on salvia. My head is alright, too.
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