Citation: M. "Returning From Another Dimension: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (exp65613)". Erowid.org. Dec 22, 2013. erowid.org/exp/65613
After reading very extensively about Salvia divinorum
I decided I was interested in trying it. I had previous sporadic experience with cannabis and alcohol, and wanted to try something utterly different, something not at all recreational. My reasons for trying Salvia were somewhat of a mix between curiosity about the psychedelic experience (although I was totally aware at the time of the difference between Salvia and classic alkaloid substances such as LSD or Psilocybin) and an interest in exploring the fabric of reality.
I am an atheist and therefore do not believe in an intelligent design of this universe. I believe humans try to explain our existence from a human point of view by creating an intelligent superior being/s as an answer to unanswerable questions. The mere thought of there being a question about our existence along with its so far unattainable answer is a human notion. The notion that there is some supreme truth is a human notion, and is therefore limited to our human condition.
I hoped Salvia would help me see things from a naturally unattainable point of view, to have insight utterly removed from our own human limitations.
I purchased a gram of crude 10x Salvia Divinorum extract at a local headshop. My sitter and I went to park at night. My setting was a huge grassy field surrounded by forest, with minimal noise pollution and totally covered in fog to the point that I could only see my most immediate surroundings. Besides myself and my sitter only a few deer could be heard in the forest back behind the park.
I started the session off by sharing a couple hits of mugwort with my sitter, to help get relaxed. I then loaded the bowl of a glass pipe with some of the Salvia and took two long hits, holding each of them in for about 20 seconds. I immediately started seeing vague geometric patterns around me, as if the fog and the grass (which was all I could see) had joined on some new level of organization that I had been previously unaware of. I could feel a slight tickling sensation around my elbows. I came to understand that I was vaguely starting to perceive a new dimensional structure of matter, as if all the particles of matter that form the dimension we live in also existed in another dimension, but organized in a completely different way. I must stress that during this part of the trip I had complete knowledge of who I was and where I was and was only experiencing slight geometric visuals.
I decided to take a booster hit from the pipe so that I could go further, but I did not experience an effects whatsoever from it. For the next fifteen minutes I just sat around in the grass talking it over with my sitter. I decided I wanted to go further so I took a couple more hits of Salvia. I held in the first hit for 20 seconds, exhaled and took the second one into my lungs. At some point during this last inhalation it happened.
All of a sudden I was in another dimension. There was no transition, no realization that anything had happened at all. I did not contemplate myself entering it. In fact, once I was there it was as if I had always been there, I had absolutely no memory of being any place else. In fact, I had absolutely no memory of even existing. I wasn't aware of having any body, had no memory of ever having a body. In the dimensional void that my awareness now found itself in I became aware of some patterns. I can not describe in words what they looked like, because they belonged to this other dimension and were therefore based upon a non-euclidean form of geometry. I was aware of the existence of these patterns, but it was not as if I was floating in the void observing them. The patterns were
existence, they were all there was to be experienced. The closest thing I can compare them to, although this does not do them justice, is a sequence of spheres of different colors that moved in wave-like motions, clicking as they did so. I felt my awareness follow this wave in different directions and (positions?!) until they spelled out a word (if that's possible). Once I realized what the word was, I audibly heard it being whispered by many voices at the same time, and I somehow tried to grasp its meaning. I can't remember what the word was, but my memory of it is that it was something similar to 'Heisho'. At first I was confused about its meaning, but all of a sudden I understood. It was a word from my early childhood and I laughed at myself for even wondering for a second what it meant.
At this point of the trip I regained consciousness of who I was and I found I had a body, although I wasn't aware of the transition at all. The word had sparked some kind of feeling of family and I found myself in another place, dimensionally different but not as far removed as the previous part of the trip. In this reality I felt the presence of a mother and a sibling, similar in a way to my own mother and brother. Then I started slipping out of that reality and coming back to our own.
My 'coming down' was an extremely confusing moment for me, because at first it felt like my return to our world was like falling into a dream, a less real reality. Eventually I understood it from our point of view and I realized that I was back, but until then I felt guilty because it was somehow my own fault that I was falling into another reality. My family/entities were confused as to why I was leaving their reality, explaining that it was pointless and could easily be avoided, but I was not in control and could not avoid the 'coming down'.
The process was gradual and several things happened during the time, and although I can remember most of what happened I can not chronologically place them. I will try to explain them as best I can, but understand that the order in which I explain them is not necessarily the order in which they happened. At some moments my mind belonged to one dimension and though it was real, at others it belonged to the other dimension and thought that one real.
As I was coming back I became aware of the presence of my sitter. I was seeing a strange plasma and as I was feeling through it with my hand, I eventually touched the face of my sitter and that made me momentarily understand that I was changing realities. I was lost in the shift between both dimensions and at times felt more in one than in the other. At one point I understood how I could make reality shift, how I could travel between both dimensions. I truthfully understood. I tried to tell my sitter how to do it, because apparently anybody could, at any time, change dimensions. I tried to tell him, but no words left my mouth. I felt extremely frustrated at that. Then, all of a sudden I could talk, and I carefully said in my head the words with which I was going to transmit this important knowledge to my sitter. Something was telling me it was impossible to tell him, but the logic of the moment was telling me that if I could say the words in my head, I could say them out loud. The moment I was about to tell him, I said to myself: 'Forget it. I'm too lazy to tell him'. All of a sudden I understood that it was actually impossible to explain such information. It was a joke on itself. It could not be told. This frustrated me even further.
At some point during the process of coming down, I felt the presence of a grandfather presence/entity. I could see his hand on my left shoulder and the very edge of him, and he was comforting me, telling me it was OK for me to enter another reality, even though it was perceived as a stupid and unnecessary process in the logic of the other dimension. I turned around to see him, but no matter how much I rotated, I could still only see the very edge of him. This was one of the moments in the trip in which I fully came in touch with our own reality, not unlike when I touched my sitter's face.
Eventually my mind completely formed in this reality, although I was still faintly in touch with that other dimension. I was still seeing geometric patterns around me. During this time my mind was feeling extremely overwhelmed and awed, and to some extent obsessed with the knowledge that 'it was a joke on itself'. I tried to talk it over with my sitter, but I was feeling too overwhelmed so I just layed in the grass with my head down against the ground for what felt to me like ten minutes. Eventually, my mind was feeling clearer and more contemplative, and I got up and had a long talk with my sitter.
We contemplated the whole experience from both points of view, and compared my story to his. Apparently while I was smoking the last hit of Salvia I started laughing uncontrollably. I have no memory of this happening. My sitter tells me that while I was laughing I suddenly stopped dead and spread my arms out and sat there immobile for a while, with my eyes wide open and awed. After that I started talking complete gibberish. After a while my gibberish became English and he clearly remembers a time when I tried to tell him something important, but then inexplicably decided not to. He remembers a time when I started rotating on my own axis towards my left, as if looking for something.
A very interesting concept is portrayed here in regard to the gibberish I was apparently speaking. I am trilingual, and consider two languages my mother language, while the third, is one I use less often. I don't consider the third one of my mother languages, although I speak it perfectly also. I have come to understand that I have two language modes that I operate in. When I have been using one of my two main languages recently, it is the language I think in and dream in. But I can easily switch in to the other language mode, and just as easily speak, and think in it. During the time of my Salvia trip I was in 'English mode'. I asked my sitter whether the words I uttered which sounded like gibberish to him, could have been in fact been my other main language. My sitter tells me that although he couldn't understand a thing, I was most definitely pronouncing them with an American-English accent.
All in all the duration of the whole trip felt really short to me, like 5 minutes in another dimension, and then 10 laying in the grass feeling overwhelmed. In real life it actually lasted about 30-40 minutes. I estimate that the first part of the trip in which I had the out-of-body experience must have lasted 5-10 minutes, and the coming down (coming back?) part about 15-20, with what I am pretty sure were 10 minutes laying in the grass afterwards.
As I returned home I felt an afterglow of happiness which lasted about 2 hours. I spent quite a few hours thinking everything over before I went to sleep, and quite a few after I woke up as well. During the next whole day I experienced a slight headache.
I rate my Salvia experience as neutral in a scale to determine how good it felt. It did not feel positive or negative, these terms just don't apply. It was however by far, the most intense and powerful experience of my life. I could not previously have even imagined the existence of such mere intensity, and I think this is partly what overwhelmed me. It has provided a lot of metaphysical insight, and I have spent countless hours since thinking about it, and trying to recall the images and feelings of the void. I have a clear memory of the experience, yet many parts of it have completely faded from my mind. I cannot remember what non-euclidean geometry looks like. I no longer posses the information I remember so clearly of how to shift reality and travel interdimensionally. Yet I have a fine memory of what possessing this knowledge felt like during the trip.
I am extremely glad I decided to experiment with Salvia, and very grateful for my experience, yet immediately afterwards I had a strong feeling of not wanting to cope with such an intense experience for a while. A couple months later I felt ready again and I smoked it, and although it was from the same batch, I failed to achieve any effects beyond seeing faint geometric patterns.
I cannot recommend Salvia to anyone. Doing so would be wrong. I can only recommend getting accurate information about it, and I hope people will make their own decision, free of any influences, because it is clear to me that Salvia is not for everyone.
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