DOSE:	1 hit	oral	LSD
		smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

150 lb

What is surprising is that I can remember perfectly now what happened that day. Nothing is obstructed.

I took a hit of LSD at 4 in the afternoon. My boyfriend took 2. We wrote down the time so we could reference when it started to kick in, and we started playing Halo. After a while, my jaw felt tense and I was shaky. A friend who was also tripping that day came over and started showing us a crystal ball. We smoked some pot and went outside.

I remember how bright and nuclear the sun felt, even behind clouds. And speaking of clouds, how amazing they looked. The ones lit up by sun were so bright and iridescent... and the rest T suddenly saw as spanning a great depth into the sky. I usually see clouds as so flat, and it takes special kinds of clouds to demonstrate the great depth they span... but I saw them clearly in the depth. I saw every movement they made, and the patterns that seemed to replicate themselves throughout the clouds. At one point, I could see a sliver of a moon straight above, and through the thin clouds, a small chunk of rainbow appeared right by the moon. I thought I may have dreamed it up, but my partners agreed it was there. It was amazing.

We went to the duck pond. I watched the water rippling due to wind, fountain, or duck. The way the highlights contained reflections of the island and trees, and the lowlights were the color of the water. They created movement across the waves. I suddenly thought of the air as liquid, surrounding us just as the water could. The surface of the water was no longer just a surface above which was nothing, instead, the surface was really an intersection of two 'liquids': water and air. The ripples showed how the air affected the water and vice versa.

It was windy, which helped realize the liquidity of the air. Gazing across the lawn, handfuls of grass twitched in the wind while others stayed still. The trees and leaves swayed, my hair blew. The air felt extremely heavy, and I could so clearly feel every movement around me.

And all the while that I was staring at the greatness around me, the two next to me were talking about many things. Physics and math of crystal balls and various other gadgets. It was amazing how I could be so focused on the scenery, yet at any moment I was completely caught up with the conversation and could easily join in. There was no confusion. It didn't matter who knew the exact details of what we talked about... I felt that we all understood, moved along at the exact same pace with the concepts.

Speaking of the crystal ball... what an incredible accessory. It was amazing how perfectly round it was--I spin it as fast as I could and did not see any rotation in the image in the ball. Movement without any visible evidence. Seeing the world inside the ball upside down, or seeing the fibers of a microfiber cloth look as large as the weave on a scarf. It was great.

Whenever we mentioned what phenomena greeted us, the others understood without words. They experienced the same.

Walking was strange. I had little sensation of it at all. I said, 'I feel like something else is walking for me' and everyone else concurred. While we walked, I looked up at the trees and thought and felt about the tree top, 'I could be there' or 'I am there'. It's something I've tried to think since, and I can almost get myself to feel it, but not the same way--not so naturally. I thought about what it would be like to be living as different people, and I understood putting myself in their shoes in a way I never had before. I could say 'imagine what it would be like to be ____' and felt like I really could understand that.

I wasn't really worried that we seemed strange to outsiders. One friend kept saying, 'Don't worry. It's all in your head.' I knew that was true. I liked the moment that we were coming upon 3 campus narcs/security guards. We all stopped talking and just walked by in silence, looking sober and nonchalant. Immediately after they passed, I broke out into a huge uncontrollable grin and looked over to see everyone else do the same.

At some point we felt fit to venture to a restaurant for food, though I noticed not being that interested in whether I was hungry. I put on a sweatshirt and really enjoyed wearing the hood even though I usually hate hoods and only wear them if it is raining. The walk over was fine... less of the beautiful sunlight, but some nice clouds and wind. On the street, it was calm and I felt completely at ease, no matter what kinds of sketchy people were walking by. We went to the door of the restaurant, and when I opened it, it was like a completely different world. It was a bustle of color and noise, people everywhere, very confusing even on ordinary days. We managed to get in line and decided to order the simplest thing we could thing of: two slices of pizza and water. We escaped to the outside... it was too much. We lost track of time, as we had been very apt to do throughout the afternoon, and I ended up finally finding our order about 20 minutes after our number had initially been called.

By night (10pm), things weren't quite as crazy as they had been during the afternoon. There were a few times, watching iTunes visualizations and listening to music... or staring at this wall in our friend's house that seemed to be moving the same way the clouds had. But mostly a sense of loss as it slowly disappeared... or as I felt it, as parts of myself that had been gone slowly returned. I felt sadness again for the first time. I tried to notice what was coming back that I didn't like, thinking maybe I could learn to get those away from myself.

I didn't like the sadness, as warranted as it may have been. I know it's appropriate and good to be sad at times, but I think in general it takes too much from me. I didn't like irritability, the way I tried to control things, that was coming back. In the afternoon, I tried to control nothing at all. I chose what I looked at and what I thought about and reveled in it, and didn't care at all what else happened. I even said 'this is the most chill I have ever been', but it wasn't in some konked out couchlock way... it was in an amazing, energetic, enthusiastic, involved way, but I was still completely chill about the passage of time and events. I didn't care about time, deadlines, or plans.

I realized don't like how much I try to make plans or secure things down. School makes us so time dependent. I didn't like some of the sense of self returning either... it had been gone, and I was so much happier being part of something bigger. It's hard to emulate, and hard to explain. In a way, the way I lived that afternoon sounds selfish... just doing what was fun, reveling in everything around me, enjoying myself more than many people ever will. But in a way, it was the least selfish I've ever been, and I liked that. I hope that is something I can retain through time.

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 65929
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Mar 11, 2011	Views: 36,967
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LSD (2) : Nature / Outdoors (23), Glowing Experiences (4), Small Group (2-9) (17)