DOSE:

repeated

Crack

(daily)

BODY WEIGHT:

70 kg

Well, some of you out there think that shooting coke is worse than smoking it. WRONG. The reason is, yeah sure, maybe shooting feels different, and sometimes the side effects are worse, I certainly did a lot. But smoking creates that awful wired, strung out, combing through the carpet for little lost bits syndrome. I never got that from shooting coke.

Shooting coke, I swear I can seriously feel it coming up, an ice cool line of numbing anaesthesia that starts in my chest and goes up my arteries in my neck , unlike heroin I swear you can feel the coke. I leaves my head swimming, all the beautiful sounds, the joy, the bliss. I really notice all the little noises around me. That's why cokers seem so touchy about noise and movement, it's hard to relax around them, they seem very sensitive. The reason is because it's so 'hypersensitising' that every whisper echoes around one's head and every background noise out on the street is almost overwhelming. That's why the old hands at this stupid game put up their hand or make a very slight shhh or give me peace gesture.

It's not like mj where I have a nice chat with my friends. No, coke is all about myself, completely self absorbed and selfish. I don't mean that in a nasty way about other users, but the focus of coke is straight inwards. I have never found it to be useful or even conducive to socialising. Just look at a coked up person at a party, do they talk and circulate among the crowd, or linger in a corner giggling and smirking like crazy.

Sure, when I took it I felt great, but when you see it in others it does not really make a better conversationalist or anything. Anyway, just after I shoot coke or smoke crack, I am not moody or trying to be rude, but I need a few moments of peace and quiet just to take it all in. But my point is, crack is seriously different. My reason is personal, when I smoke it, I get a big volume of blood all infused with it and half of it is basically heading straight up into my brain. A shot in the arm lingers and finally finds its way up after a delay of five or so seconds, whereas crack just slams you, in usually no more than a second or so, seriously. I'm being serious. That makes a big difference, believe it or not. A shot I feel more in my head, but a hit feels very bodily, somatic. Smoking that shit could make me seriously desperate, and when I smoke I just never ever feel satisfied. At least with a shot your body never seems to get so tuned in to it so quickly, I guess because needles will always remain alien and strange to the body. But with crack smoking it feels like something completely vital, second nature that almost instantly yme feel you need more and more. Also with a shot I am forced to take a one off, unrepeatable dose that might not be enough or might be too high.

When I did shots I certainly never scrounged around for bits of shit off the floor to jam up my blood, but with smoking I did that all the time, picking through everything in the vain hope it might be crack, and then smoking it and suffering the [nasty] consequences.

I have seen people sick, fighting, arguing and ripping each other off over a white powder that has no real worth. In that respect, the money loss, and greed and desperation not to mention degradation, I would say coke is seriously ten times worse than heroin. Seriously, with hammer at least we could share and cooperate no matter how bad our habits were. But I saw coke take a big leap up and it fucked the whole community. They were drug addicts before, but before coke hit the place life was comparatively normal! After that point, all the dealers went bad, people got sick, they never slept, a lot of lies and rip offs occurred and things just went downhill. Funny though, all they had down in Sydney (Australia) when I lived there was powder coke, I never saw crack, ever. I had to make it myself, which was very simple and easy. But because of the lignocaine and stuff it kept getting cut with [all sorts of terrible things] the smoke became foul and acrid, 'chemically' tasting. So I stopped cooking because I was wasting what little real coke actually remained in the heavily cut product [I never had no 'connections', I was just a fucked up street junkie] that was on offer. And to be serious, although I used a lot of it up my veins, I still feel looking back that the needle did me less harm than the pipe, just because needles impose certain limits, as in limits on what could be used, and restricting use to less frequent doses because each one seemed to be a definite separate unit. With smoking, my worst memory is of all the time I spent pathetically trying to scrape out the frost from the glass and smoke it. It never worked! Also with smoking, there was a tendency to have too little to start, then it was too late, because the first breath tended to block out any real feelings for at least half an hour, but like idiots my friends and I would keep wasting perfectly good rock trying to chase up the first hit with a booster to improve the high, but it was all blocked out and amounted to nothing. So really because of feeling permanently unsatisfied, filthy sweating, exhausted and emaciated too, i had to give it up. Probably not a bad thing.

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 65938
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Dec 6, 2017	Views: 4,058
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Crack (82) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Various (28)