DOSE:

2 bowls

smoked

Cannabis

(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

65 kg

I had the whole morning and afternoon to relax. I'm 18, going through my last year of school, and live with my parents... I'm writing today on saturday 3rd of November... these events took place yesterday, a Friday (no school this week). I live near London, UK.

In the morning I did a wake and bake sorta thing and knew that today I would try and push for more of a spiritual experience with cannabis and I thought that the best way to do that would be to dose higher. I had two packed bowls of nice skunk... let's just say I was pretty damn baked.

I went out into my garden, taking along with me my iPod and my bong as well as my stash and a lighter, finding a nice little tree stump near the back of my garden where I would not be seen from the house (the garden stretches back a good distance and curves round slightly) back here at this time of the year its mushroom kingdom. I'm not well versed enough in mycology yet to pick shroomies... even though there are many mushrooms I suspect to be cyanescens and semilanceata I'd rather not risk it.

Anyway back of the garden its mushroom kingdom, as I was getting more and more baked the mushrooms themselves started agitating me, I didn't want to be too close to any because I got very worried about toxic content and/or crushing them underfoot. About 15 minutes into my smoke I had retreated away from my tree stump to the edge of the garden and sat down under some pine trees, a few metres away from the stump.

It was a truly beautiful little place, and the lowering angle of the sun made it a truly picturesque landscape. The huge amount of shadow and light made for an interesting pictoral even without the inclusion of colour, and the colours added so much more. Damn it was vivid and beautiful thanks to the weed and I decided to continue where I had recently left off... listening to the Beatles.

I had listened to the first few tracks of 'Abbey Road' the other day, an album I had not fully explored yet, and decided to continue where I left off, having just finished 'Oh! Darling'. The opening guitar riff gave me great pleasure and I proceeded to sit there quite content listening to my music and smoking my cannabis. The lyrics bore a great resemblance to my current situation, a state of bliss and comfort in the shade being described... yup I'm there.

The drug certainly helped my enjoyment of the music so I pressed on. I remember once I got to 'Here comes the sun' I was really feeling pretty beautiful. Really good song to listen to while stoned, man it was perfect peace and love. 'Because' caused my understanding of the world to shake up a bit, and it placed me on a different place in the world. Things were slightly softer, quieter, duller and shinier in different aspects... moreover though I felt as though my current position was meaningless and my true reality was drifting through the world... the drug actually helped me feel as though I was floating.

I remember during the part where it's sung '1,2,3,4,5,6,7 all good children go to heaven' over and over again at the end of 'You never give me your money' I felt a thousand tiny spiders and bugs descend on me, as if to shoo me away, and I almost ran away from my place... suddenly though when the smooth tones of 'sun-king' came on I was reminded that I have nothing to fear from nature... nothing at all and I basked in that golden glow I felt from being there.

At points during the gibberish that is sung at points of 'sun-king' made me feel strongly as if the Beatles were playing some sort of sick joke. The fact that they were being silly out of the blue kind of annoyed me, as up to that point I was really enjoying it. Somehow though it really prepared me to get completely sucked in for the rest of the album.

Right until the drum solo of 'end' the music was no longer some external thing. It was my reality... I no longer felt connected with the real that we experience around us, I was simply swimming in a sea of pictures that my mind made with relation to the songs I was listening to. But the important thing is that it's not just limited to what I saw, it affected what I heard as well (as hard as it is to express) but more than how it affected my senses it affected my knowing... as if it wasn't really sensual stimulation at all... I was just being told by some cosmic force (the music) how things were.

I had a very important discovery while listening to 'Carry that weight' that I've now forgotten. I can laugh at an implication that silly now... but I know at the time the discovery felt very important to me... like the most important thing in the world. I'm optimistic I'll find my way there again.

Then as the Ringo Starr drum solo (as I found out later the first and only drum solo of Ringo's affiliation with the Beatles) near the start of 'End' played. It felt as if some mystical figure was actually hitting the sides of my brain to produce to the sound, and not a drum set... and I was being awoken from my trance back to reality... for there was something to be shown me in the real world. The chanting that goes with the guitar 'love you' over and over again in the first half of the song really shook me... there was something that loved me in nature.

It was here that I beheld shadows on the grass of my garden infront of me made the shape of what looked like a sort of pagan god figure... the legs seemed to form in the shape of the lower half of an 'A' letter... it was as if in perspective, the body seemed far away not small, and it was like at the end of the A figure was a body and head. It was a very simple drawing resembling a human done entirely with straight lines, manifest half in some random shadows on the grass resembling nothing, and half very vivid and meaningful and live in my brain thanks to cannabis.

The 'love you' chant made me suddenly connect with the beauty of nature, and I felt as if mother nature was looking over me, loving me, caring for me on this strange rock. This feeling was quite similar to what I had felt before. This feeling of love from mother nature... the whole surface of the planet earth being perfectly suited to looking after me thanks to evolution (and just the fact that where I'm standing, is like an incredibly rare spot of very low entropy in the universe, and that itself is remarkable in the massive void) and this was the warmth I felt. The fact that despite being pulled along unwillingly through the void by a massive rocky body... at least on the surface of that rocky thing was a world... a whole goddamn world just for me and my kind.

'In the end, the love you take, is equal to the love, you make' (what a line, I'll carry it with me forever)

Well anyway, after the end of 'End' came the long utter silence before the 20 second finale 'her majesty'. During the silence I looked back at the shadow, it was gone, I didn't see anything remarkable about it, in fact right next to me was where the shadow ended, the sun was in front of me not behind... the shadow was coming in from ahead, not coming out of where I was sitting (bear with me). Just as I made the connection to look towards the sun, and the breathtaking skyline... the hidden track 'her majesty' came on.

It made me realise that the whole experience was just one way of making sense of reality. What I hold important changes from day-to-day, what makes a difference to me is fleeting and in its own way desperate and the real important thing is just what I do with myself day-in day-out... how I act and what I say to people, who I meet and how I get my highs.

The whole experience lasted about 30 minutes.

Entheogen use is all about set and setting to me. Man that's so important... I can't say I've ever had a really bad trip... I've been spooked on drugs but I've never been emotionally discomforted to the point of what most people term a 'bad trip.' What I have done though is wasted a lot of weed especially on nothing trips, the sad thing is that if I don't get any good vibes or any bad vibes what I'll get is no vibes at all... which means I won't really trigger my feelings into any action... what a waste of tetrahydrocannibol... what a goddamn waste.

Music is my favourite art form while affected by cannabis. It's not hard to follow while high like cinema is... and its conveniant, and I suppose most importantly being high is like another option on the equaliser. In that listening to something while being high is completely different while sober (it can be better or worse), if there was a setting on the old EQ for emotional impact well you're just turning that right up to 11 and opening the flood gates. Ideas pour in and the music hits harder, we all know that already though right? If it's an album as remarkably well constructed as say 'Abbey Road' is then I think there will be a more pronounced sense of meaning to your trip.

If I listen to an album that's worth is greater than just the sum of its parts... or a symphony... or something a little longer than 3 minutes... for me it can increase the power that music has exponentially...

When I do drugs, I make the world around me meaningful, and my experience will be meaningful. If I was working towards a central message, and I wasn't, then that's it. I apologise for my crappy writing style, goodnight.

Peace and love

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 66795
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Apr 10, 2012	Views: 10,878
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