DOSE: T+ 0:00	2 hits	oral	LSD	(pill / tablet)
T+ 0:59	1 cig.	smoked	Cannabis	(plant material)
T+ 0:59	70 mg	IM	Ketamine	(liquid)
T+ 0:10		insufflated	Methamphetamine	(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

145 lb

I have read many articles and other literature on and by Timothy Leary, Albert Hofman, William Burrougs and Hunter S. Thompson. I have also researched the realms of mythology and the use of dissociatives in discovering ones self and mind. I have never really understood human behaviors; in fact it strikes me as rather odd and ritualistic. From the beginning I have doubted that we have found the full extent of our minds. Since then I have desperatly trying to find some 'gate way' so to speak which would allow me to discover these regions of the mind. Thus I found dissociative aenesthesitcs.

I have used PCP many times in the past with varying resluts. I have snorted Ket a few times as well. I have shot PCP many times but never shot Ket. I decided that the time has come.

Now, I am a strong lover of LSD and almost always have some laying around for self discovery. I also love meth becuase it stops me from passing out from lack of sleep. That's all you need is a trip cut short becuase your tired.

I was in a happy mind set and in a familar setting... so everything was good to go... (this is very impporatant I have found).

So I popped two dots, smoked a joint and then prepared my shot, picked a vien, and hopped on the train.

Almost immediately I felt the familiar sensations of dissociative anesthesia. I just laid there for what seemed an hour, but was closer to 10 minutes and thought I was swimming in space. There were lovely stars and an eveloping feeling of euphoric hope.

I could describe those first minutes as lustrious. Then I snorted a cap of meth and went outside. I found a beutiful spot in a near by forest and laid back down.

As I prepeared my resting place for the evenin I could feel the acid creaping up my spine. Beutiful colours and a warm cozzy feeling enveloped me. The next four hours were spent in another dimension.

So there I was sitting alone in perhaps the worst place on earth, if I was still on earth, wondering what had happened. I had the vague impression that I was looking for something that I havn't found. I looked around the room and saw nothing but darkness. I started walking hoping to find something... anything. I looked down and saw my feet, but no floor. 'Must keep lookin'

All of a sudden an angelic vision which appeared to be George Orwell, (one of my favourite literists)... We talked for a while and he told me that once I found what I was looking for all the answers would become clear as to our existence. In finding it I would find the answer. But what is it....

He disappeared in a phospherent flash of emmotions... blinding actually... Looking around I now see myelf in a populated bar of unknown origin. I looked around at the felow patrons and saw that they were not exactly human. They looked as if they might be some sadistic boched version of humans but didn't quite turn out right. I couldn't place what was wrong with them... I just knew they were wrong... Some had a blue tinge to their skin... some were gore red.. some were techincolour... my skin started to mold into a deep shade of bluish green... very dark and mysterious... I kinda saw this (afterwords of course) as the trait of herd conformity.. and pet peave of mine but something we are all guilty of in some fashion..

Sitting off in a corner occupied only by a piano and herself; she doesn't notice me right away.. but eventually i catch her eye... she looks astonished to see me and quickly looks away... I walk over her and she says her name is Anne... 'Havn't I met you before?' I ask.. her reply comes in whispered tones close to resembling a claiscal orchestra... yet to me they made perfect sense... (you see I'm lover of clasical music, and all music in general actually) She told me that I have never met her before yet she knows everything about me. I tell her about the war in her eyes and somehow it all became clear. we spent the next few hours talking in subtle remarks on what happens next...

I can't exactly remember the converstation but I knew then that I found it... she held out to me a gold box and insisted I take it... I reached out and grasped it; and i was struck with a force greater then anything i've ever felt... another explosion of colours and sensations sent me soaring through time and space... faster and faster still... no one is at the wheel...

The ride ends in a small meadow.. something you could only read about.. it's beauty not really existant in this reality.... still holding the box I open it... and it all disappears... back to the ever ending darkness... I call out for anne... then anyone... silence is the only answer...

I remain in this place for a while... and then slowly the grass and trees fade back in... there I was laying in the grove in the forest. I was still extremely stoned. But I felt extremetly relieved... as if I did find the answer... I just couldn't remember what it was... but I knew I found it...

I havn't yet duplicated this response or ever found anne again... but I know she's in here (my mind) somewhere... Hopefully next time I visit her I will have more recolection of our conversation...

Still to this day I feel that I did indeed find the answer that I was looking for... I feel that perhaps my consiouc will not allow me to know it.. because then I would stop looking... but... I don't know exactly...

I know that i will continue to use dissociative and psychedelics to paruse my inner self many times again in the future.

Exp Year: 2000	ExpID: 6766
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jul 31, 2001	Views: 24,241
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Ketamine (31), LSD (2), Methamphetamine (37) : Combinations (3), Alone (16)