Citation: Jinxed Fortune. "Omniscience for Mortals: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (exp69496)". Erowid.org. Jul 6, 2013. erowid.org/exp/69496
||Pharms - Albuterol
I am a 31 year old pharmacist. I have always been interested in psychedelic substances, and decided to try salvia since it was a legal alternative to other substances. This is a report of my third experience with salvia, but I will briefly describe my first two experiences in order to provide background. My wife was my sitter for all three experiences.
My first two salvia experiences were using 250 mg of 5x extract smoked from a regular tobacco pipe. Both experiences were very similar. I retained awareness of my surroundings (my bedroom). However, the walls seemed insubstantial, and two dimensional pictures appeared to be three dimensional. I was able to speak, but mostly what came out was gibberish. The most profound thing about both experiences was the feeling of power running through my body like an electrical current. My whole body tingled, and I felt that I had the ability to mold reality just by focusing my will. Both experiences lasted about five minutes, and there was a discernable build-up, peak, and decline of effect.
My third experience was much different. I used 70 mg of 20x extract smoked from a water pipe (filled with water). Beforehand, I used one puff from my albuterol inhaler to help open my lungs. My mind was focused on the sensation of power I felt from my first two experiences, but this time I wanted all the power and control. I wanted everything. I sat on my bedroom floor, and smoked the entire amount of extract in one inhalation. I held the smoke for a count of twenty, and was already feeling a little fuzzy when I exhaled. I had this feeling the first two times, and knew that the salvia was taking effect.
I said to my wife, “I’m going.” However, this was just from my point of view. She said I did not say anything.
I felt a sensation of being pulled backward very rapidly. It was like looking out the back window of a car as it accelerates from zero to top speed. I reached for the nightstand in order to “slow myself down”, and I remember my wife reaching for her drink on the same nightstand to keep me from knocking it over. This was the last thing I remember of the “real world” before the experience peaked.
My bedroom vanished, and the pulling sensation stopped. I was floating/flying in a space of absolute blackness. Below me was what looked like a book of infinite pages, and the pages were of infinite surface area. The pages were turning extremely quickly as if someone was riffling them. The pages did not contain words. Each page showed an image. I was aware that each page was of a different universe or time. I tried to enter the book, but the pages were turning too quickly. I could actually feel the pages striking my face. It was similar to sticking one’s face into the spinning blades of a fan. Then I heard a calm, deep voice.
“You’re reality is a lie,” the voice said, “This is your existence now.”
“No! No! No!” I screamed, “I can’t live like this.” I felt this overpowering sense of terror. This voice was telling me that I was trapped in a place where I had all of existence before me, but it was moving so quickly that I couldn’t process any of it. All I could see were the edges of the pages, and glimpses of the images on each page.
During this time, my wife said that I had a look of absolute horror on my face. I was on my hands and knees crawling toward her, but unable to speak. I remember my wife calling my name, and the turning of the pages slowed long enough for me to see her clearly. This only lasted a second, and then the pages resumed their previous speed.
Being trapped like this was too much for me to bear, and I began wishing that I was dead. Oblivion would have been preferable.
“You are dead,” the voice said.
Oddly enough, this had a calming effect. If I was dead, then what was the worst thing that could happen? I began to focus my will on slowing down the pages, and they did slow somewhat. I saw images of my past: riding in a school bus, watching Family Feud, and many other scenes. I also saw what must have been me in other universes. I was seeing how my life would be different if I had made different choices in my life.
The pages had slowed, but they had not stopped. So, I reached out with my hands and took hold of the pages. At about this time my wife heard me say, “Sorry righty. Sorry lefty.” I must have been apologizing to my hands because I thought that stopping the pages would hurt.
The pages slowed down greatly, and I could hear and see the TV. A rerun of Law and Order was playing, and I started saying things to the TV.
“I hate Andrew Dillard. Someone should kill that SOB.” Andrew Dillard was a character in that episode.
Then I said, “F*** you, Jack!” This was in response to the sermon the prosecutor on the show was saying.
I knew I could stop the pages, but I knew that I had to stop on the correct page for my universe and time. That is when I saw my wife on one of the slowly turning pages. I reached out and grabbed her waist with both my hands, and the turning of the pages stopped. I could see my wife and my bedroom clearly, but on either side of her I could see images of other places. These must have been the pages adjacent to the one I was trying to enter.
Holding onto my wife, I pulled myself into the page. Once I was through, I fell backward onto the floor. I was back in my reality, and all effects of the salvia were gone except for a mild feeling of calmness. There was no coming down. The effect was there, and it was gone.
The experience was frightening, but upon retrospection I do not consider it a bad trip. I wanted everything, and I got it. My mortal mind was just unable to process all of the information. I plan on using salvia again. I think it is important to have a clear idea of what you want to experience before you trip, and always always have a sitter.
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