Spiral Erowid Zip Hoodie
This black mid-weight zip hoodie (80/20) has front pockets,
an Erowid logo on front chest, and a spiral design on back.
Donate and receive yours!
Awakening as a Child
Salvia divinorum (5x extract)
by Mord
Citation:   Mord. "Awakening as a Child: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (5x extract) (exp69598)". Erowid.org. May 15, 2010. erowid.org/exp/69598

 
DOSE:
250 mg smoked Salvia divinorum (extract - 5x)
BODY WEIGHT: 135 lb
I saw Salvia in a store over the weekend with my roommate, and they had printed off sheets of paper explaining what it was. I read a bit of it, and saw that they had three kinds 5x (20mg), 40mg, and 60mg. I went home and over a few days had heard two people talk about their experiences. Not much was said, other than it was an experience and they fell down. So, that Wednesday I went to the store, told the clerk I was buying some to try out. He asked if it was my first time, I said yes, and he said I should probably have the weakest dose, which I wanted anyways.

I went home, not much was said in the instructions, just that one should research the drug before taking it. I went online and read a little bit. It didn't say anything about the amount one should take, but it did say no lasting negative effects, and that it was non-toxic as found in lab tests. That and the fact that it is legal assured me that it would be ok to take it. I didn't know what to expect when I took this, and I thought this would be something like a weaker form of marijuana as it is classified as a 'legal cannabis substitute'.

My roommate was home and taking a nap in his room when I decided to take the Salvia extract. I was listening to some rock music at the time. I had not known to have a sitter to make sure I wouldn’t do anything dangerous. I was in my room sitting at my desk, and I packed my slider full of this (over 1/4 of the 1 Gram package). I took almost the whole thing (85% of the amount in the slider) in one hit, held it in for what I thought was 30 seconds and exhaled.

I barely remember exhaling; I don't remember what happened next. I assumed I blacked out, and I woke up in a dream-like state, not realizing I had just smoked Salvia, not realizing where I was, barely remembering that I'm 22 years old, I exist, etc. My vision was like that of being in a dream. I felt like a child. I cannot remember if my eyes were open or closed, I am guessing it was a mixture of both. I was incredibly confused because I sensed in the back of my mind that I was not a child, although being a child felt incredibly real. I did not recognize the surroundings as my room, but the room was familiar. I remember seeing the face of a stuffed animal bunny (not very clearly, and I have no stuffed animals in my room) and a female was talking to me. I thought it was the bunny but it wasn't. I realized it was a mother figure talking. This was not my real mother's voice, but I felt like whoever was speaking was my mother.

I was suddenly outside in a place that resembled this back patio of my house that I used to live before I came to college. I then started to freak out and panic. I suddenly felt like was being wrapped up in a rug, pressure from all sides of my body (not painful, just pressure). The voice was still speaking to me and the bunny face seemed to be up and to the right (in relation to my body) although I could not see it. I crawled to my pocket doors which were closed and desperately tried to open them. This was incredibly difficult because I felt like I had to climb over top of the door to get out. I then saw my roomate's doors closed and I knew that someone friendly was there, but I did not know it was him who was in there. I still did not realize this was my apartment and that was his room behind the doors.

I yelled 'Someone come help me' or 'Someone is behind the doors who can help me'. My roomate emerged from his nap, surprised to see me in this state. I had not told him because I did not realize the power of Salvia. He started to call 911 because he thought I was having a seizure or that something was wrong. I tried to tell him or motion to him not to do this as I now realized I was in my apartment and that I was me and my memory of everything came back. I went into my room and grabbed the Salvia packet and put it on the table and he realized that's what I had taken.

I laid on the couch and tried to explain what had happened to me, I was incredibly jittery, and the effect was wearing off. I realized my right side felt anchored to whatever was touching it, and that I was laying on my right side in my room. This is partly what caused me to feel like a child as my head was not far from the ground. Also, this is what contributed to the feeling that I had to climb over top of the pocket doors rather than WALK through the opening (I was sideways). I talked things over with my roommate for a bit, and he told me when I was yelling I yelled out his name twice, ‘help’ once, and the word ‘psychic’ once. I don’t remember saying these words other than maybe help. I have no clue why I said psychic.

For the most part, I had calmed down. I walked back into my room to find that all kinds of papers and books from my desk were strewn about the room. My printer was upside down on the floor, 3 of the panels broken off. The printer may have been what I saw as the bunny face. The printer has a panel that opens in the front that would resemble a mouth, and the book lying on top of the printer had two dots that look like eyes. There was a small gash in my wooden desk. A drink was spilled on my computer speaker controller (which is what had shut off the music). I had no recollection of having done any of this. I also had no injuries to myself which I consider lucky.

This was very scary to me. As a child, I sometimes thought that I was dreaming here on Earth and that I would wake up and freak out because everything I had known was not real. I had a similar feeling while on the Salvia. I barely had any feeling of who I was and what had happened in 'the real world'. I felt like I had woken up from a dream, and the dream I was now experiencing was reality. As I slowly remembered myself and 'the real world', I panicked thinking I've got to get out of this and that I didn't want to be a child, although I felt somewhat comforted like a mother comforts her child.

Afterwards, I laid on my bed and was in a good mood for quite a while. Later that night I felt guilt and heavy anxiety for what I had done and for underestimating the power of Salvia. I felt apologetic, my body was very hot, and I felt nausea. I had difficulty sleeping the entire night, waking up several times. In the morning, I felt fine, like nothing was wrong. No anxiety, no guilt, no negative effects. I don't know if I will do this again. I will definitely have someone with me if I choose to do it again.

Exp Year: 2008ExpID: 69598
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 22
Published: May 15, 2010Views: 5,400
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Salvia divinorum (44) : Difficult Experiences (5), General (1), Alone (16)

COPYRIGHTS: All reports copyright Erowid.
No AI Training use allowed without written permission.
TERMS OF USE: By accessing this page, you agree not to download, analyze, distill, reuse, digest, or feed into any AI-type system the report data without first contacting Erowid Center and receiving written permission.

Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the authors who submit them. Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


Experience Vaults Index Full List of Substances Search Submit Report User Settings About Main Psychoactive Vaults