DOSE:

150 - 250 mg

smoked

Salvia divinorum

(extract - 10x)

BODY WEIGHT:

140 lb

I'm in college, and I have been interested in psychoactive chemicals for a long time. I've done Marijuana in high school, alcohol occasionally, tried morning glory seeds once, and this would be my 3rd time doing salvia.

My mindset was that I wanted to smoke it, lie down, let any visions come as they wanted to, not trying to fight anything, and let it come as it will.

The setting was my dorm room, with my roommate being a sitter. The lights were off, and we had some light ambient music playing in the background (the kind that is usually good for this kind of thing). I told him not to mess with me if I started acting funny. But, as I was soon to find out, he's not trustworthy.

11:40 PM -- I take the first couple hits. I didnt have enough, so I had to refill it. During this refilling time, I could feel that my legs wanted to move, similar to the early stages of being high on marijuana.

11:42 PM -- I take an enormous hit of it, and hold it in for as long as I can. Before I even had a chance to exhale, I was out, and I knew it. After about his time, I could no longer keep track of time.

I knew the trip had started, because every time I have done salvia, this phenomenon would occur. It's hard to describe in words, but what happens is that everything that I see becomes like a flat picture, that is ripped in half horizontally. Then, visually, it gets 'zipped' together from left to right, but the actual motion that I feel goes right to left, the entire time. It might be hard to explain this, because in a way...I am the zipper.

All of a sudden, I no longer have a body, but at the same time I cannot remember ever having a body. Yet, I am aware that my 'presence' takes up a certain amount of space. Then, as the zipper, I tie together space and time (the things and events at the current time, and where my 'soul' or 'presence' actually wants to go) in order to explore, or rather, find where I am supposed to (or where feel like I should) be. Zipping through time and space isn't smooth though, it moves in short jumps, about 4 every second. Note that my vision of what I actually see never changes, just my perception of where my next destination will be.

The zipping feels like my body is actually being zipped open, from left to right. I know that I don't have a body, but I can feel it nonetheless.

About half-way through the zipping through the 'picture' that I see in front of me, I see what appears to be the wall of a yellow house. In retrospect, I think I laid down and saw my window with the light coming in from outside, but at the time, it was 'my house.' I had officially one into another reality. I don't know if it was a part of my past, a past life, the past of the real world, or a completely different reality, but it was in a very small town, maybe in the country, during the 1950's, or earlier.

I was laying on the ground in the sunlit afternoon (in real life it's like 11:45 PM) and enjoying the day. My wife calls me in (lunch had just gotten done) and tells me that it's time to drop the kids off. I get up and decide that it probably would be a good idea to take the kids 'there.' I don't know where 'there' is anymore, but at the time 'there' made complete sense. In this different reality, I had 2 kids, a son and a daughter. The daughter was older, and her name was Jessie...or Jassie, I'm not really sure. Now, what is weird about this 'dream' thing, is that I'm white college student, no girlfriend, no house, no kids. Yet in this vision, I was a black person, and so was my entire family. Yet, in retrospect, everyone looked slightly cartoonish, but that could have just been my perception at the time.

This part of the experience seemed to last about 15 to 30 minutes, because when I was 'transported' there, I had the perception that I had always been there. That's who I was, and that was the life I was living at the time.

It seems like my eyes opened, and I look and see the room that I am actually in. Yet, I really can't see it too well. That's because the zipping is still continuing. I could still hear my wife...she seemed to be yelling at me that I shouldn't take Jassie, because she'd done something bad -- smoking. Now with my eyes open and I could sense the zipping again...

This is one of the most profoundly unique aspects of salvia that I have experienced all 3 times:
I felt like I was standing up next to my bed, but the salvia was making my perception zoom and 'zip' in a circle around the room and everywhere, and that's why my perspective was one from lying on the bed, and I that had to put in a deep effort to get my perspective to return to my head, next to my bed. It is really hard to push myself to 'zip' back to my head. But I know that once I zip back to my original place, my perspective should change back to normal, and things will be OK again. I don't have any idea 'how' to zip, but somehow it's in my instincts to know how, so I just do. I feel inside out, and I need to zip everything back together.

So I'm on the ground, trying to zip back together, realizing that I, in fact, am Jassie, the one in trouble by my parents, and that my dad was going to kill me (the dad used to be me. But now, I new that I must have just been 'dreaming' about being my dad, and visualizing what he was probably doing at the time). I also realized that I had 2 strange people in my room (my roommate, and the kid down the hall). I was also going to be in trouble for having them over.

Then, I had to try really hard to actually figure out what was really going on. The zipper stopped trying to zip back to my perspective on the bed, because I realized that it was just the drug (that I took as the black daugher, not the white college student) was effecting me. I got really scared, and tried to 'sober up' so my dad wouldn't be mad.

The next series of revelations happened really fast, and came one right after each other, but I had to put a lot of effort into actually understanding them, or coping with them.
First I realized that my room was in the west corner of the house.
Then I realized that I wasn't actually a black daughter, but I had no idea who I was.
Then I realized that I was a little kid at my grandma's house (the yellow house actually did remind me of my grandma's house, in retrospect)
Then I realized that I was in college, but I didn't know who I was.
Then I realized that my room was actually a dorm room.
Then I realized that I had done salvia, and I was tripping balls.
Then I realized that I was hot as hell, and sweating.

I tried taking off the hoodie that I was wearing, and as I did, the sensations of the cloth on my skin was just way too overbearing. I couldn't handle it. Plus, in the darkness of my shirt when it was over my head, I could see very trippy visuals. Sort of like a kaleidescope effect, but more electric and like fireworks, or the audio visualization on Windows Media Player.

When I finally got my sweatshirt off, I looked up at my friends, who were laughing, silently, because I told them not to make sounds, just make sure I didnt try to kill myself. I still didn't know who they were, but I knew what they were there for, so I stood up and tried to talk to them and convince them that I was coherent. I can't remember much of the conversation, because within seconds I was back laying on my bed.

All of a sudden I could actually notice the music that was playing in the background, and it really annoyed me for some reason. I was really pissed off at it, so I ripped my iPod out of the speaker-thing, and threw it across the room.

Then another weird sensation came along: the entire world was in a zip lock bag being drained of air, and so I was being stuck to the wall and my bed. I really couldn't move, because the air-pressure was so high.

This became roommate mistake #1: he started laughing at me, and asked me 'Hey, who's there in bed with you?' This was not a good idea, because it made me think logically and brought me 'back to reality' which as VERY unpleasant. The more I fight the trip, the worse I feel. I responded by telling him to shut up and not to mess with me.

I'm not sure what happened at this point, but I began rolling back and forth on my bed, because gravity seemed to be changing in the room, and the wall I was leaning against became the ceiling, and I had to brace myself on my desk in order to avoid 'falling' to the other side of the room. It made me kind of sick to see the other kids 'standing' on the 'wall' because they were defying gravity.
Then, I had a weird sensation like I had actually gone insane.
'Hey...HEY....I hate you. Why would you.....You know what you did?
Why would you take some....marijuana or something....and then give me the....insane-making...drug?' I wanted to convey that to the kid in the room, but I'm not sure what really came out. I tried convincing myself that life wouldn't be too bad being insane. There's a lot of insane people in the world, and they get along OK. Plus, I could have my hallucinations to live by, I wouldn't be lonely.

I calmed down and decided to close my eyes and see if I could see any visions. Wow. I can't even begin to describe them. They were more than just visions -- they were an entire living, moving, 'landscape' that I was floating through. There were green 'mushroom' shaped bristles coming out of the fabric of the 'end of the universe' and would light up, or shoot out, or something. They went on forever. I wanted to stay and float in that reality forever. But when I thought that, I realized it was only a hallucination, which brought me back to reality.

I thought I was coherent again, so I got up and went to the room across the hall. (my sitters had left me. I thought they would be trustworthy, but they had gone!) I went in and sat on a chair, and just sat there trying to figure everything out. I knew 'where I was' but it felt like it was a 'different version' of it. Kinda like if I were to have visited it in a dream. Then my roommate comes to me and asks me some stupid question.

I reply by trying to remember something from before. It seemed like that me and him were on different 'planes.' It seemed like in my vision, we were drawn on paper, and in between me and my roommate was where the artist decided to use a new sheet of paper. I tried showing him where it was, but he just laughed and said 'No, I think it's over here.' I got incredibly pissed off at him. I tried explaining the story of the yellow house, and he said something else stupid, obviously trying to mess with me and get me to say something, or do something funny for his own enjoyment.

I yelled at him, and went back in my room on the bed, trying to get back to the visions. But I couldn't...The feeling of the bedsheets were just too greatly distracting. They felt cool, but I didn't care, because they were distracting me from returning to that space with no time, and mushroom lights.

I laid like that for what seemed like 20 minutes until I decided that I was probably coherent enough to do my homework (completely untrue). I turned on the light, went to my computer, and tried to find my homework. It was already 12:10. I didn't think it was going to last that long -- a half hour, and I still felt relatively out of it.

I knew by looking at the homework that I wouldn't be able to do it, so I went back to the kid's room across the hall, to apologize if I did or say anything stupid, and then came back to my room, and turned on the light to find my toothbrush etc. My roommate yelled at me, which was weird, because I had no idea he was even in the room.

I went down the hall, brushed my teeth and stuff and tried to go to sleep.

I put on the music that was playing earlier, but instead of being pleasant, it was just annoying and keeping me from falling asleep.

It might also be important to note that anytime I tried talking to someone, I could NOT find the right words. Everything I said was only a small fraction of the meaning I meant it to be. For example, at one point I said 'You might not think so, but I think if I try, I could be coherent' but what I really meant was more along the lines of 'No look, I can talk. I really can. I dont think it should make a difference or not if you're in a different reality than I am, because I can recognize it by looking at you that you're NOT in the same place I am, but isn't it amazing that we can converse like this?! It's simply amazing.'

I was also angry at myself somewhere during the experience that I hadn't just laid there, let the visualizations come, and enjoyed the ride, but in reality, it wasn't really my choice. Almost nothing I did was something I chose to do. Not that I was being controlled like a puppet, but more the feeling of being on a roller coaster -- you'll allow it to happen as it will, as opposed to driving a car, where you choose everywhere you go.

All in all, this was my most intense Salvia experience. They say it has a reverse tolerance, and after this, I definitely agree with it. A lot of these 'visions' weren't so much 'visions' as they were 'dreams.' It was simply amazing, and so intense that I don't think I'll be doing it for a long while after this.

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 70378
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Dec 29, 2020	Views: 1,223
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