Citation: MaRyWaNnA. "Wonderful Refuge From Ten Years of Terror: An Experience with Lorazepam (exp73654)". Erowid.org. Jul 31, 2019. erowid.org/exp/73654
I was 21 years old the first time I had a major panic attack, one so awfully frightening that I collapsed on the sidewalk on my way home (or to the hospital), and a kind young lady helped me walk the rest of the way after I assured her I would be fine. The panic attacks continued sporadically for the next 7 years, until last month I finally had one to scare me badly enough that I went to my doctor about it. He prescribed me a month's worth of Lorazepam, and assured me that the panic attacks wouldn't actually kill me.
I went home and put them in my medicine cabinet, and pretty much forgot about them until two days later when I took an attack. My husband went in and got one, and handed to me with a glass of water. I took it with the water, seriously doubting that ANYTHING could end my irrational fright
I took it with the water, seriously doubting that ANYTHING could end my irrational fright
, and certainty that my heart was about to explode like a cherry bomb inside my chest. 45 minutes later I was just as calm, and pleasant as a cat lying in a warm ray of sun. There was a comfortable warmth all through my body, and i quite honestly believe that if anyone were to come up to me and punch me in the face, I probably would just smiled and said 'Howdy'. I went to bed about an hour and a half after I took it, and when I closed my eyes, I kept imagining myself floating on a cottony cloud floating lazily over a rich green island in an unknown paradise, and I swear sweet Jesus that that's exactly the way it felt.
I'm so glad I went to my doctor about it. I'll never have to suffer through another hour or more of such terror thanks to Lorazepam. I just regret how long it took me to finally get help for it.
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