DOSE: T+ 0:00	2 g	oral	St. John's Wort
T+ 0:00	2 caps	oral	Amanitas - A. muscaria
T+ 2:00	1 cap	oral	Amanitas - A. muscaria
T+ 2:00	1 cap	oral	Amanitas - A. muscaria
T+ 0:00	repeated	oral	Alcohol - Beer/Wine
T+ 0:00	repeated	smoked	Cannabis
T+ 0:00		smoked	Tobacco

BODY WEIGHT:

165 lb

I've just finished my first year at college, which ended unfortunately in terms of academics. Both my grandfathers, who I was very close with had died within a year of each other, and I was having girl problems. I was suffering from depression and a serious lack of motivation. However, on the weekends I felt pretty normal as I was still able to outdrink my peers and I would never turn down a good sesh if some weed was offered.

This summer I began to try new things. I had already experimented with weed and a couple of OTCs (diphenhydramine being a favorite). Somehow I became aware of the magic mushroom known as amanita muscaria. I did vast internet research several times this summer and even watched a British documentary about an experiment with the mushroom. I decided this was something I needed to try.

After thorough searching on the internet I found a web vendor that seemed like a good choice. I purchased 28 g of the top quality amanita and waited. I checked the tracking website about twice a day, and, due to a screw up with the tracking information and a subsequent mix-up, within a week I was the new owner of 56 g of mushroom. Lucky me! My friend H was house-sitting for his boss that weekend and I decided it would be the perfect place and time to try it out.

On Saturday, I took 2 g of St. John’s Wort, which I started taking regularly and then occasionally as a self-prescribed remedy for the occasional shitty mood day. I ate two caps at about 6 pm. They didn’t taste that great, so I washed them down with some soda, and then began to cook my dinner. I ate dinner and my friend arrived to pick me up. I brought two more caps with me just in case I wanted more.

We got to his house and started drinking beers. I was feeling kind of buzzed and was only on my second beer. This confused me, as I have a pretty good tolerance alcohol, so I figured I was feeling initial effects of the amanita. As we chilled at the house, awaiting for the arrival of another friend E, so we stayed at the house for about another hour drinking casually and watching TV. During this time, I decided to eat another cap to heighten whatever effects were on their way. We decided it was time to leave. I still had one more cap on me and figured, “Fuck it, mind as well go all out.” I chewed it up an washed it down with the last of my beer. During the drive over we got lost because I was intoxicated and trying to use GPS to navigate to the house. Eventually we got there, and I was feeling like I was in a significantly altered state.

We introduced ourselves to the people we had not yet met, sat down, and began to play a game of Kings. I really don’t know how much I drank during the game, but I was trying not to drink as much as I usually do because I didn’t want to get drunk. However, I’m pretty sure I did get drunk. During the game, a girl had rolled a pretty fat spliff and passed it around. I took a heavy hit, but it wasn’t enough for me to notice any difference.

After a while I had been noticing a feeling of disconnectedness from my body. I began to flail my arms around, gently hitting E and proclaiming, “This isn’t even me! I’m not even doing this!” I truly felt like I was a passenger on a ride that was my body losing control. I stopped this pretty quickly, but continually had fun exploring this new feeling.

The girl whose house it was had a dog, and I noticed him immediately. Soon enough, I also noticed his eyes were beckoning me to come play. I sat down on the floor, asked the dog’s named, and called him over. When he came, I was utterly shocked. I was absolutely sure that this dog understood English. I began talking to him, every now and then yelling something or another about how the dog understood me and was talking to me and how unbelievable it was.

My understanding of time was entirely gone, and I could not tell you how long we did anything that night. By this point, my trip was way too internal for me to converse normally with anyone, so I sat and enjoyed some heavy reflection. I had been casually drinking since the end of the game of Kings and I still had a beer with me. I put the beer down on the floor next to me and pretty much forgot about it, until I knocked it over with my leg. I couldn’t really control my body, but I quickly realized what I had done. I swooped up the beer can and threw my sweatshirt, which I had been holding, onto the carpet. The girl had a really nice house and a really nice carpet, so I felt very guilty. I put my beer down again, this time much farther from my body. However, I instantly knocked it over again somehow, but this time snatched it up before any sort of noticeable mess was made. You’ll never guess what happened next… I put the can down and knocked it over one more time. H told me “Dude, stop spilling your beer,” and the hostess said “Ummm, can you not spill beer all over my carpet?” I snatched the beer up and gave it to H, and apologized to our hostess.

I could have been intentionally spilling the beer, which I highly doubt, out of some sort of amusement. I also could have just been so internalized that I had no clue what my body was doing as I sat there, which I’m pretty sure was the case. However, I was too unaware of anything I was doing to discern my motives. At this point I decided I probably should not have drank as much as I did.

We all went back out to the porch and sat down to continue our chatting. By this time, people had begun leaving, so that was in the back of our heads… well, not my head, but my friend’s heads. I started to feel queasy, so I ran out to the back yard, which overlooks the dock, and sat down waiting to vomit. However, the queasiness went away and I realized I really needed to pee. I peed off the grass onto the sand and ran back to the deck. I sat down on the floor with my arms wrapped around my knees and tried to listen to the conversation. I could not focus on it. Instead, I traveled deep into the vastness of my mind. I don’t remember what I thought about, but I recall having minor hallucinations that felt like dreaming. The intense inner exploration was great. My friends mostly thought I was either sick or passing out, but every time they said my name I would respond instantly with a murmur of “I’m awake.” The inner exploration felt eternal and very heavy. I cannot explain my feelings during this time. Someone informed me that we were leaving, and I hopped up, apologized to our hostess for the spilling and got in someone’s car.

We drove to house only a couple of minutes away. I was still searching deep within myself, and I figured some weed might make it even better. I took several (I say several because I really have no clue how many) hits and my experience intensified. I was just barely hearing some of the conversation my friends were having, when I realized my intoxication was getting way too heavy.

Suddenly, I started to feel pretty queasy again, and informed my companions I needed to go back inside to hit the bathroom. I rushed down the stairs and found the bathroom, but was no quick enough. I began to vomit hard onto my hand as I entered the bathroom. I quickly directed my retches to the sink, but a little bit had gotten on my clothes, the rug, the wall, and the outside of the sink. When the retching stopped, I started to clean the wall and sink with my some paper towels but soon decided I needed to take a seat. I sat down next to the toilet and began to vomit more. After this wave of sickness, I put my head down and went on a journey. First I was worried about the effort it would take to clean up my mess, but that didn’t last long. Before I knew it, I was sinking deep into my subconscious and having intense dreamlike thoughts. Despite the fact that I was sick, which I didn’t even really notice, I was having an amazing internal experience. This continued for my whole stint in the bathroom which lasted anywhere from half an hour to an hour (but then again, I had zero concept of time). Every now and again I would realize that I was sitting up and vomiting more. I was miserably sick, but almost entirely unaware of it. I would all of the sudden come to and realize that I was vomiting.

The last bit of vomiting was pretty gross. I was more grounded in reality because I was pretty much just dry heaving now. I realized that my body was trying to purge itself entirely of the amanita/beer mixture, and I felt pretty stupid for having taken so much. Just before the vomiting ended, I started to worry that maybe I needed medical help. I figured I could handle it. When I finished, I put my head back down and began to dream again, but then heard a knock on the door. My friends were getting ready to go to bed and they were wondering if I was okay. I told them I was fine, and I stood up to clean my mess. I was pretty impressed with how well I cleaned the bathroom, even though there was a small stain on the rug.

I came out of the bathroom and found L, who had opened up a fold-out couch for me to sleep on. I slept in the same room as E, who was high and was out like a light within minutes. I, however, felt like I was trapped in some sort of fun house. This is when the trip went bad. I wanted so badly to fall asleep, for the whole thing to be over, but the room spun and strange images swirled in my mind. This strange, uncomfortable experience went on for what felt like too long, but could not have been more than ten minutes.

When I woke up, I felt hungover and groggy as I usually do when I drink and smoke the previous night. When the hangover passed, I just felt strange the whole day. I hung out at E’s house with some friends, swimming, chilling, and drinking. It was a nice way to relax after the intense experience of the previous night.

My experience did not go the way I planned, but I don’t really regret it. I mean, I have plenty more amanita to try because of my fortune, and I don’t feel that I wasted it. I do wish I had been aware and smart enough to limit the amounts of the other substances I took. I probably should not have had anything to drink at all. Usually, once I start drinking socially, I tend to do so pretty hard. I should have been better aware of this fact. You live. You learn. I’ve learned.

I’m excited to experience the amanita again, and limit the other substances. I will not drink, but I may smoke a little weed if I feel like it. I don’t know when the next experience will take place, as I don’t know when I will have the time (vital time away from authority) enough to devote myself to a substance that can cause such a long-term, trippy experience.

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 73686
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 19
Published: Jun 23, 2020	Views: 867
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Amanitas (5), Alcohol (61) : Difficult Experiences (5), Depression (15), Hangover / Days After (46), Combinations (3), Small Group (2-9) (17)