Citation: Malkav. "Possessed by Another Being: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (40x extract) (exp75720)". Erowid.org. Oct 5, 2021. erowid.org/exp/75720
For my 22nd birthday, a friend gave me what was left of his salvia 40x extract, it was only a tiny amount - but he assured me it would be enough. He no longer wanted it, as he had had a bad experience prior. I have used Salvia leaf and 20x extract in the past, and enjoyed it both times.
With the company of my girlfriend and flatmate, I loaded up the bowl with a minuscule amount, just to get a taster and got myself a glass of juice (smoking is harsh on my throat, so I like to have something to drink nearby). I torched it, using a standard clipper since I don't own a jet lighter, and took the whole dose in a breath. Since it was a small dose, compared to the 'normal' dose, I wasn't expecting anything earth shaking.
I held the breath in for as long as I felt able, and slowly breathed it out. As it came on, I became overpoweringly aware of a separate entity in my being. It toyed around with me for a moment, and I began to feel a dimensional wind tear at me - as though I were traveling somewhere, or a portal was being opened inside my soul. This being seemed to originate from the glass pipe which I now clutched in my hand. It had fused with me for a second before I became aware that it was still as inanimate as before.
The entity inside my body grew restless, It demanded a name, I gave it that of 'Thiingor' aloud (to the confusion of my gf & flatmate), being unsatisfied with that, it demanded more, more of my kingdom. It glared eagerly at my lighter, I told it 'no, you can't have my f'ing lighter' but it continued its tirade in the mortal realm. It looked at the girls and laughed, how it had only dreamed about being able to venture into our dimension.
It clawed at my brain, its lust for control into the realm of reality overbearing. It clutched at my motor skills, bidding me grab the pipe once more, to which it had grown attached, the glass blue pipe with the skull. I gave in, allowing Thiingor his prize (it had now asserted a gender). We clutched at the glass pipe, our hands cold and clammy. I still had control of my hands, but I believed it would be little work for thiingor to simply take them from me - such was his power. But for now he seemed content with his pipe, it was almost a vessel for him to live in, a different scope on life; this lone, lost soul of the warp, Thiingor.
The mild dose of salvia began to calm down, and I felt Thiingor losing his grip on our world. He wanted to talk more with the girls 'because they are so polite'. Eager to see more of Thiingor, I loaded up what salvia I had left and finished off a second bowl. Propelling me once more into the eerie world of Thiingor. He took me over violently this time, and he had grown somewhat aggressive. I had moved his pipe far from his grasp whilst holding the second breath, and refused with all my will.
He persisted, playing havoc with my other systems, causing tics, small rushes of air, light spasming as he fought me with all his anger. I surrendered, wishing only freedom from this endless cosmic combat. He took my vocals, I felt my mind being forced into the back seat, an unwilling spectator in this invasion. He explained, not in my own voice, but his own, mimicked through my human vocal chords, aloud to my flatmate, who, until now had merely been an ambient hum in the background, like birds in the park, that he was Thiingor, and that he lived inside my subconscious, and had always done since the beginning of time, and always would.
Salvia was the key to opening the portal between our dimensions. He took over my motor controls, and eagerly examined all the was laid out before him - a wooden box, he rummaged, mocking me aloud 'Hah! Malkav, what foolish little papers, this lighter, shiny - a true prize, haha' easily amused he picked up a paintbrush, and ran our fingers through the bristles. sensations unknown to him.
We began to feel thirst. But He did not know how to swallow! and since he had taken my motor control, I could not assist him. Unable to swallow, we struggled to swallow saliva that built in our mouth.
I seized control once more, I would not allow him control of my life, for fear that he would then move onto the flesh of my girlfriend. His world began to fade, and reality pushed its way back through, I fought off any remaining fragments of the beast, Thiingor; his army in tatters.
Feeling foolish for my exclamations, I apologized to my sitters and finally swallowed some juice and bathed in the afterglow, wandering around for a while.
To summarize, this 40x extract was immense for the dose I took, which was very small. I experienced no visuals through the whole thing, something I normal associate with Salvia, and I retained the ability to speak (even if it was not I who was speaking). But the disassociation with reality, and the overpowering sensation of being possessed will stay with me for a long time.
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