DOSE:

5 - 6 hits

vaporized

DMT

BODY WEIGHT:

170 lb

I have dabbled with DMT a few times (3 to 4 times) over the past two years and have had only one threshold experience, which was very vivid * or so I thought at the time *

Over the past two weeks I have experimented every other day with varying dosages usually less then 50 mg. (smoked). The experiences were euphoric, with intense patterning of things, enjoyable and fun.

With the increasing comfort I decided to step it up a notch. I loaded the pipe with two doses and sat on my bed with my friend D accompanying me throughout the trip. After melting and letting it vaporize we began the process. I understood that I must obtain adequate dosage before 30 seconds otherwise I would not break through. So D struck the first match and I began to hit it with all I had. Finishing with taking 5 or 6 beefy hits the trip began.

I handed the pipe to D and lay down on my bed. Instantly I was swept into another world, darkness surrounded me, the intense patterning was no longer there, I was curious as to what was happening as this was new experience. After about a minute I suddenly came back to the room I was in, it looked the same as it did before I had begun. I was puzzled.

Then suddenly it happened. I could feel something happening in my body. I lifted my arms up and what I saw took me by complete surprise, they were disintegrating, my fingertips began to melt forming little balls that traced down my arms, and soon my hands were completely gone, my arms followed… then I could feel my legs disappearing. I sat up in the bed and began looking around, I was extremely frightened and began to feel my body disintegrating I could see my clothes lying on the bed, I was missing, I glanced around the room free of my body, and noticed the room was falling apart, until there was absolutely nothing in the room, existence had suddenly been halted. Only the most primitive part of my mind remained, emotion/life was nonexistent, just simply the blackness that surrounded me, and a simplistic awareness. Then it occurred to me that I was experiencing what one might consider death, the beautiful colors no longer emerged my panoramic view. I was certain that I would never return from the reality from which I had come. After an unknown amount of time I can vaguely recall sitting up, things began to come back in small amounts, i.e. grays and blacks. I sat up frightened for my life, reached for D’s hands with no ability to actually see his face, the only vague thoughts I could bring forth was that I was physically dying. After this point I cannot recall anything else of the trip, coming to I saw the room I was in in varying sizes, from small to extremely large, shape shifting was extremely vivid, but tolerable to an extent… After it had ended I discussed with D the events, and what I learned was extremely interesting.

According to D I lay down on the bed after I had handed him the pipe, then after about two or three minutes I had sat up and my eyes were red possibly about to cry, with the most frightened facial expression he had ever seen out of me. After another minute I began to repeat the same question to him “where am I?!?!” over and over again, he began attempts to calm me down letting me know where we were, who I was, and that I was still there (and in one piece), I am unaware if this actually helped although I imagine it did.

After the trip had concluded I still encountered trouble distinguishing that the reality we all live in is actually reality as the trip was real on an unprecedented level. Although I cannot recall much from the experience I know it was extremely vivid and the most “real” thing I have ever encountered on any psychedelic. The experience was enough to cause me to shake in fear for a few hours afterwards. However after I was able to comprehend it, I believe that the experience simulated a Death/ Rebirth experience for me as the peak of the trip was such that everything was fading (including my self) along with the “Death instinct/feeling”. After the trip had passed in full I approached everything as if a 2 month old baby would, everything seemed as though it was new to me, I believe that the trip has broken me down and allowed my self to shed a new light on my life, which was what I had been seeking over the past four years as a person dealing with possible manic depression.

Rhis will probably be my final experience with DMT as it has helped guide me to what I have been seeking, as frightening and intense as this trip was It has most definitely helped set the stages for me to reconfigure my life in a more positive aspect.

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 76849
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: May 26, 2021	Views: 485
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DMT (18) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Depression (15), General (1)