DOSE:

0.2 g

IV

Heroin

(tar / resin)

BODY WEIGHT:

140 lb

I start to wake up. I'm dreading another day of this crap and I hope I just keep sleeping. I cant and I know I cant until I get well. As I shoot out of bed I check the time to make sure I don’t miss my window of opportunity. 11:00 am, good, lets hurry up now.

Once I'm dressed I start scrounging around for any bits of dope I may have left behind from yesterdays high. Of course there is nothing, and the sickness is hitting hard. I call T “going down today?” I ask him even though I know he is. Junkies like us go down everyday. I'm from the twin cities MN and when were going to get well, we called it going down as in going downtown I guess. Hes gonna be here in 20 minutes. I realize I’m broke, and dope sick. Damnit, another embarrassing trip to the pawn shop with what everyone knows is stolen. The guy at the pawnshop knows me, and knows why I'm there. “heres 200$ worth of stuff sir can I have maybe 60$?” he also knows I will take any amount of money, so I walk out with 40$. 40 measly dollars. God damnit this will barely get me through the day.

Finally were in the city, I hate the city, I hate these dealers, I hate this junk. I'm crawling out of my skin by now, me and T have been yelling at each other the whole way down due to the sickness. Finally he calls them. Every second they take to answer seems like forever but thank god they do, they always answer. They need us junkies just like we need them. Once the deal is set in stone a wave of relief flows over me, I see the dealer, he see us and now its on. I receive my 40$ worth of tar, wrapped so nicely in 3 balloons, weighing in at .1 each. Finally, I get my medicine. I'm sick you see? I need this tar, boy do I need it. Once I got that stuff in my hands I grip that shit so tight God couldn’t take it from me. I tell my boy to find a fucking gas station with a bathroom so I can turn it into my private lair. That’s where I found my heaven, on the bathroom floor of a 7-eleven. I load up my tool with such anticipation I can hardly maintain. Its done, everything’s ready to go, I tie off and say to myself ‘thank god’. I'm shaking so bad it takes me a couple tries to hit the vein. I'm sweating, and I want to die I feel so bad.

Once I take that belt of my arm I lay back and my whole body tenses up with pleasure. I cant move it feels so damn good, so good. I exhale with such a relief and promise myself that was the last one. Every one was the last one, ever since the first one.

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 80889
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Aug 19, 2020	Views: 744
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Heroin (27) : Addiction & Habituation (10), Small Group (2-9) (17)