DOSE: T+ 0:00	1 g	smoked	Crack	(freebase)
T+ 2:00	500 mg	oral	DXM	(pill / tablet)
T+ 3:00	500 mg	oral	DXM	(pill / tablet)
T+ 3:30	1 g	smoked	Crack	(freebase)
T+ 0:00		smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

120 lb

First I'll start of with a little background information on my substance use. I began smoking pot a little before my 13th birthday in summer between when I was in 6th grade and 7th grade and I enjoyed pot on occasion. I found out about dxm when I was in eighth grade and enjoyed that about everyday at high doses until I realized what I was becoming, not a drug addict or anything, but so detached from the physical world that sex didn't even appeal to me at all only dxm. I learned alot though. I learned that people live the way the way they do for all the wrong reasons. Anyway in high school I experimented with drugs like lsd, mdma, pcp, and meth. But I always felt detached. The only thing that made me normal was pot. So I was stoned all the time.

Well on with the story. It was about 10:00 when my friends came to pick me up so I left my house quietly so as not to wake anyone and hopped in. We drove off and went downtown to our resident drug dealers house. He was not home so we decided to go to the projects and see if we could find anyone with weed. We saw some black guys sitting on the side of the road and slowed down as we drove by to see if they wanted to sell us weed. Right as we got next to them they ran up to the car and asked us what we wanted.'weed, like a dime bag' we said. 'Oh, we don't got no weed.' He said, 'We got crack.'

We looked at each other and decided to get some. We drove to our friends house and smoked all the crack. I felt very strong and almost invincible. We were in a park with a playground by my friends house and I remembered playing on playground as a child.

We got 8 500 mg dxm capsules and we all took one. We asked our friend if he could get us some more crack for later. 'Sure', he said and walked down the road. A little later he came back with 20 dollars worth of crack. We thanked him and drove off. We went back to the dorms were my friend lived and parked the car. He was not in college but his aunt worked there and so they lived there. We went to this student lounge with paintings of aliens and other planets on the walls. My dxm really started to kick in then I took the other pill. I took the first one about an hour earlier at 12:00. We sat around and talked about pyramids and how weird the world was. I felt as if we were the ones meant for this. Chosen ones.

A very short time later I felt the onset of the other pill maybe 30 minutes. Then we smoked about all but a few good sized crystals. I felt the normal insane feeling that I feel before I black out on 1000 mg and was expecting to be gone for a long time in the corridors of disassociation. But the most amazing thing happened instead of blacking out I was there completely conscious from the stimulation of crack I guess.

I could feel the universe being born inside me. I could understand everything who what when where why and how. I was part of everything. I tried describing what was happening to my friends but they already understood the same thing as me. A tear drop came to my eye as I could understand beauty and love and everything all at once.

I knew the meaning of life and I finally got what dxm was trying to tell me. Not everything didn't matter but that it was feeling the power to understand what did matter and truly let the things that didn't matter not matter. I realized that I have to stop asking what I am here to do and realize the meaning of life is not what do I have do but why I am doing it. The meaning of life is to understand that if there was nothing there would be no experience, the meaning of life is to let it all go and feel. There is no reason to be afraid of anything. We are all as one. I need to realize I don't have to be a rockstar to enjoy my life. Just realizing how beautiful a tree or my girlfriend is, is enough; because that is what living is about... living.

Exp Year: 2001	ExpID: 8123
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Oct 14, 2020	Views: 2,877
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Crack (82), DXM (22) : Various (28), Mystical Experiences (9), Glowing Experiences (4), Combinations (3)