DOSE:		inhaled	Nitrous Oxide	(gas)
			Various

BODY WEIGHT:

250 lb

Salvia, Nitrous and the Vortex

I am a male. 50 years old. I have done a great deal of hallucinogenics as well as opiates and cannabis. I was addicted to heroin for a while and kicked it cold turkey. I was also a crack user, but I wouldn't say addict. I used crack cocaine when I could afford it. When I couldn't I stopped.

As a teenager I had access to, through a girlfriend (who became my first wife at the age of 18), doctor prescribed methamphetamine in liquid form. Between the ages of 17 and 21 I did every and all of the kinds drugs that I could. The only thing I didn't do back then was injections of any kind. Although I did codeine, I was not interested in opiates. OTOH I loved methaqualone. And did 714s whenever I could. Please excuse the long prologue, I have a point here.

My story is long and strange. For a while I had a girlfriend (long after my first divorce) that had access to a person who was actively creating hallucinogenics. We would be their test persons. I remember getting a sheet of blue dots that were of all different sizes. She wanted us to tell here which dose was which. In other words. What size should she sell to her customers? We never knew what it was. But we spent a month doing these dots. The small ones did nothing. The large ones were almost like LSD.

There was a time that I was taking tiny barrels called 'mescaline', yeah, I know. But the purple ones were good enough that a friend and I rode bikes from Manhattan to Bay Ridge Brooklyn to get some at a Nathan's Restaurant. The person that sold them to us became my second wife.

Salvia and Nitrous Oxide bring me to the same place. I have been doing nitrous from the age of 17 to just recently. It's my favorite 'head drug'. I do nitrous the WRONG WAY. Let me make this clear. THE WRONG WAY. I take a dispenser and instead of attaching it to a balloon I slowly open the valve and inhale it directly. THE WRONG WAY TO DO IT. I'm talking about the little whipped cream cylinders here, not a huge tank.

Having said that, I've done literally hundreds of cylinders of nitrous in one sitting. 200 in 1 and 1/2 hours usually. When I'm on a good roll, I am in pretty much the same place that I find myself with salvia. I guess the difference is that salvia doesn't need me to have a part of my body (my hands) getting frostbite while changing cylinders that are FUCKING FROZEN! The experience is almost exactly the same. Thus:

The world that we live in is a joke. Almost like those facades that they use in western movies. I can see behind it and see the vortex. The vortex sometimes has TV screens on it showing me things. Sometimes there are females or a female there talking to me. I understand that I can easily leave this life if I wish to. But usually I just don't have the balls to make the move. I make excuses. Then the beings show me what it's all about. The chaos that is behind everything. Everything that I think is real is a speck in the vortex. The vortex is real, the specks are for me to see. I will be forever in the vortex.

Sometimes it makes me feel relaxed. Sometimes it makes me so sad that I want to die. But there is nothing but consciousness in the vortex. Forever.

The vortex and the choice. That's it.

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 82211
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 50
Published: Jan 6, 2018	Views: 1,209
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Salvia divinorum (44), Nitrous Oxide (40), Various (136) : Entities / Beings (37), Retrospective / Summary (11), Not Applicable (38)