So This Is What The Shaman Sees...
Citation: DK. "So This Is What The Shaman Sees...: An Experience with DXM, Cannabis, Opium & Alcohol (exp839)". Erowid.org. Nov 4, 2000. erowid.org/exp/839
I had quite a bit of experience with DXM in the past. I had grown used to the effects of a second and third plateau trip, but what I was about to get myself into I could have never imagined outside of a dream. LSD had taken me far in the past, showing me things I thought impossible, but this trip on DXM... Well, I still don't know what to think of it.
It all started earlier that night at the grocery store. While picking up my weekly supply of mac & cheese and ramen noodles, I ran across the pharmaceutical section. Robotussin Maximum Strength Cough syrup caught my eye and I thought, 'What the heck. Its been awhile since I gave this stuff a try.' I grabbed three 6oz. bottles, made my purchases and headed back to my apartment.
I decided that since I was going to take such a large dose, it would be best to do it late at night when no one would disturb me. No dinner for me that night, I knew from experience that it was easier to drink robo on an empty stomach to avoid nausea. I set all three of my alarm clocks ahead of schedule so that I'd be sure to be up in time for class the next day at 5:00 PM. After taking the phone off the hook, I poured all three bottles of cough syrup into a large mug. Because I had had previous bad experiences with Vicks 44, I can't just chug the stuff and get it over with. If I do, I get sick. So I decided to turn on the television, smoke a cigarette and take my time.
Beginning at about 9:00 PM., the effects started to set in roughly forty-five minutes later. All but about an inch and a half of cough syrup was left in the glass. Forcing myself to take another gulp, I realized that I couldn't finish it all off without something to cut the nausea. Around 10:30, I shuffled into my kitchen and pulled out my stash box from the closet. A warm, fuzzy feeling started to overtake me and then the infamous robo itch set in. In between breaking up the weed and loading the pipe, I would stop to scratch my arms and head which were itching like hell. I noticed my motor coordination beginning to fade when I took a small hunk of raw opium from its bag and added it to the bowl as a finishing touch.
Standing wasn't an option anymore. My legs began to feel numb so I took a seat back in front of the TV and sparked up the bowl. After awhile, the bowl needed a stir, which had become a real effort since I was having trouble keeping in touch with my own body. Somehow, I managed to finish it, drank a little more cough syrup and gagged again. I was able to struggle out of my chair, make it to the kitchen sink and pour what was left of the cough syrup down the drain. My stomach felt queasy again and, overall, I felt like shit. The horrid cough syrup taste wouldn't leave my mouth, which also felt numb, so (and I don't know why I did this, but I remember doing it) I stumbled over to the refrigerator, took out the Jagermeister, and had myself three shots. Remarkably, I didn't throw up.
I was feeling a little better after that, so, robo walking all the way, I plopped back down in my big comfy chair and had me a cigarette even though all desire to smoke had left me. The consequences of my Robo drinking were really starting to come on strong now. There was so much delay between the strobing visual effects that it felt like I was in complete blurry darkness for seconds at a time. The ceiling fan, which was on, was starting to bother me, being just out of my range of vision, so I reached over and turned it off by the switch on the wall. This is when things began to get interesting.
While smoking my cigarette, I passed out momentarily, dropping the lit cancer stick on the floor. Not a good thing. Realizing I had done this, I grabbed it up quickly, burning myself (I think), and haphazardly put it out in the ashtray. Moments after doing that, I passed out again. I felt myself fall through the floor and then there was this strange feeling that my eyes had been opened up by some unknown force. I couldn't hear anything, even the TV that was still on. I was in a jungle, somewhere in Peru, and after walking through the thick underbrush for some time, I came upon what looked like a large temple. There was this old Native American guy chanting in front of it and he stopped when he saw me and asked me why I had come. I don't know why I replied like this (even though I'm a big mythology buff), but I said to him, 'I'm looking for Coyote. Do you know where I can find him?' The old man laughed and cast a warm-hearted grin in my direction, 'Oh, that Old Man Coyote. He's a tricky one. To find him, you must catch him.'
I snapped back into my body like a broken rubber band. I was panting like I had just ran a marathon and I was almost positive that I was going to die. I half stumbled/crawled over to my cordless phone and picked it up. Then I remembered that it was unplugged and would do me no good. Out of disappointment, I tossed the phone over my shoulder and hobbled over to my bed where I crashed face down. Next to my bed, I had a notebook and a pen. I managed to open to a blank page and scribble nearly illegibly into it, 'Note to self: Dissociatives are called dissociatives for a REASON!'
Once again, I went under. The desert was vast and hot. I could feel, smell, hear, and taste everything around me. In the expanse of the sand, I heard a coyote howl at the full moon in the sky (the sun was also present). I turned around to see a set of glowing green eyes in the distance followed by the laugh of a jester. Drawing up tangible power from around me, I darted after the distant coyote that was on now on the run. It felt like I was going at light speed. Jumping over one of the dunes, all which lay before me melted away into a black void. Desperately trying to stop myself from falling, I screamed at the top of my lungs and then the oddest thing happened to me. I was awake again for a split second from the shout, but my mind was still falling and I felt the little consciousness which had been lent to my body for that brief moment slip back down into the void to rejoin the rest of me like the last few grains of sand through an hourglass. After what seemed like an eternity, I hit the bottom of the void, landing on my back. It was an incredibly soft landing, as if I had fallen on a billion feathers. A great white light enveloped all around me and I opened my eyes. Sitting above me was the coyote looking down. It put one of its paws on my chest and then backed up for me while I tried to regain my footing. It sat and stared at me and for a brief moment, I understood everything the coyote was about. It was as if I had become the coyote.
I woke up again, feeling as sober as a priest, around 4:30 in the morning. I got up, had myself a glass of water and returned to bed, completely bewildered by what had just happened. At least it felt like it had just happened.
I now consider the coyote one of my Spirit animals. But beyond that, I gained instant respect for DXM. It's extremely powerful and can be used for creative and destructive purposes. I had talked to modern Shaman who had used DXM before. Usually I would just laugh and brush off their warnings. Unlike LSD, DMT, shrooms, etc., DXM grabs you by the ear and drags you along for the ride. If you're looking for a drug for religious workings, Shamanistic work, or out-of-body experiences, then by all means try a large dose of DXM. You may find it very useful. However, as for the upper plateaus as a recreational dosage, I'd advise you to think again. You may not know what you're getting yourself into.
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