Citation: Mr.Writer. "Tryptamine Teachings: An Experience with 4-AcO-DMT & Various (exp85762)". Erowid.org. Sep 14, 2010. erowid.org/exp/85762
[Erowid Note: '4ace' is more commonly used to describe 4-AcO-DiPT, which leads to some confusion about the identity of the substance described in this report.]
set: party mode
setting: hanging with 3 friends indoors and then outdoors for a bit
I dose out 4 x 45mg parachutes of 4aces. Two of my friends back out and decline, so it's just me and a friend tripping. We swallow the ball of tissue down with a beer and begin smoking a blunt.
10 minutes later I'm starting to feel very, very relaxed, in that unmistakable serotonergic way that these psychedelics work through. I'm starting to feel my mindspace becoming larger every second, that space where my thoughts are . . . expanding, a vast auditorium now echoing with my inner chatter and sensations. The expansion comes with a physical sensation of warmth, vibration, and a kind of subtle poisoning effect; some medicines work this way.
I begin to feel a discomfort in my stomach, which rapidly escalates to a pain and nausea, and I run to the bathroom and in one or two heaves empty my stomach. I had previously eaten some shady lebanese food that was a little weird for my stomach, it came up. I felt much better right away and the vomiting was quick and painless. I'm glad I didn't fight it and let it happen.
I come back and my friend takes one look at me and says 'you are SO HIGH!'. He says it as though he's afraid for me, which makes me giggle inside . . . degree does not imply quality, and in my experience, if it does, then in psychedelics greater degree of effects implies more positive degree of effects, if only in hindsight. The medicine always, always heals, and more of it will heal more, though individual chemical nuances must be taken into account when increasing dose.
The two sober friends leave for a while to go grab some K, leaving me and my friend M alone. M is not feeling so hot . . . this is very intense for her, and she feels a bit queasy too but doesn't vomit. The stomach ailments only last for about 30 minutes, during the come up, invariably the most uncomfortable part of a psychedelic journey.
We lay on the bed, staring at that which eyes cannot see, looking at each other with understanding and warmth. She searches for a cigarette to help with the jitters of being blasted to a +++/++++ within 15 minutes, but alas one of the departed sober friends took them. She sits on the ground and stares at her dog who is running in his sleep, kicking her kitten who is trying to snuggle with him. The scene is far too precious even in a sober state, and it causes us to absolutely fall apart with giggles and happiness . . we laugh, and laugh, and she starts crying from the laughter . . . I can see she is emotionally overwhelmed by this medicine.
This was not a good time for her to trip, and I am worried that I have brought her on a journey she should not be taking. I only gave her this dose because she'd done it once before and wasn't too blown away. But every trip is different, even with the same substance and same dosage . . . and course when you're dealing with an accuracy of +/- 3mg, that can make a huge difference. 40mg might be a great fun light trip, 43mg might be a horribly difficult excursion into the depths of your deepest darkest self.
I look at her a while and ask her gently if she's ok, and she nods her head, and I can tell they are tears of emotional release, she's been needing to cry them for a while. She cries and laughs some more and then fixes her makeup, which is not easy to do at this point.
The friends return, we do some K, go out and do fireworks, and come back to do more k and drink and smoke pot. Me and M are so high this time that the two other friends I feel are getting annoyed, we are just lost in the process. I am accosted several times in the night by them for sitting cross legged staring at a wall motionless . . . it's unfortunate that we took something that is best used for individual use or in a setting where everyone is on the same page. You know it's awful to do psychedelics around sober people as a general rule, but it can be even worse to do them around people who are on other substances than I am (like booze pot and k). Not being on the same page mentally in a social situation can lead to some friction and baseless drama and such, but in my state I could see the causes and effects of these things happening and was not worried, I knew there wouldn't be any lasting nastiness.
Eventually it's time to go home and I walk home, very shakingly, make it home, tire myself out some more, smoke some more, and sleep.
There was virtually no visual aspect of the trip to speak of . . . very very light on that end, as 4aces can be. It was all to do with thought processes, introspection, revealing inner drives and wants and truths. I think I bonded very well with M and we were very close to begin with. I think she found herself in a scary vulnerable spot and me just being there with her, in that same spot, calm and understanding, allowed her to breathe and not drown.
Overall a poor choice of substance and dose. I will be saving all my 4-aco-dmt for only the most serious of sessions. It is far too heavy, extremely heavy. Heavier than LSD imo. LSD can be light and frolicky, 4aces has invariably taken me to a place of austere reflection, and even if its full of warmth and laughter, it is a truly powerful reckoning of the self, a stripping of defenses and pretenses. It pushes my face into the most unfaltering and honest exposure of the minutiae of what I am . . . to be forced to perceive the normally invisible machinations of my mind is always shocking, both in what it is I see and in the knowledge that this is nothing new; I am only being shown what was always there, hidden from my attention, below and above my magnification and normal conscious context, unavailable in standard resolution.
This one sometimes makes me think 'psychological', not 'psychedelic'. Handle with care :)
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