Citation: entropy. "I Made a Complete Fool of Myself: An Experience with Zolpidem (exp87479)". Erowid.org. Apr 19, 2021. erowid.org/exp/87479
Since overcoming opiate addiction I have had trouble falling asleep. I have restless leg syndrome as well as an overactive mind at night which makes falling asleep difficult. I phoned my doctor, who is aware of my past addiction, and told him I was unable to fall asleep. I had been prescribed Ambien (10mg) while in the hospital in the past while under his supervision, so he wrote me a prescription for thirty 10mg tablets.
Two days ago I filled the prescription. Interested in what effect it would have on me, I immediately took one. It was still light out; I was going to try to stay awake so I'd know if it had any recreational value. It made me feel uninhibited, my gait was affected, and gave me a mild euphoria. More so, it made me drowsy to the point where I was nodding off in front of people. Later that night after the effects of the first pill wore off, I took two more. This time there was a mild psychedelic, disassociative edge. I was very uninhibited, acting so strangely that the people I was with told me I was acting fucked up and asked me what I had took, which led into a lecture that I can barely remember. I remember saying I had a prescription for Ambien, and remember them saying 'well if a doctor gave you a prescription for it I guess it's alright, but you're still acting like an idiot.'
Later that night, I took two more pills which came out to 5 pills in about 5 hours. I don't remember anything of that night except for making the STUPID decision to inject a pill of ambien. It didn't do anything to increase the 'high.' The solution was a murky milky white color which I know was terribly unhealthy to put directly into a vein... I definitely regret doing it. For a reason unknown to me now, I kept the syringe I used which would come back to bite me in the ass.
The next night, I took two pills at bedtime. I don't remember anything from that night. What follows is what I was told transpired. At around 1 in the morning I was blasting music while people were trying to sleep. The people who live with me repeatedly told me to turn it down, which I didn't. I then went to bed, music still blaring. One of my roommates came in and tried to rouse me to no avail for about 10 minutes. They said my breathing was shallow and rapid. They finally managed to partially rouse me by shaking me and started to ask me questions like 'what are you on,' etc. I did respond but it was unintelligible nonsense. My roommates debated on whether or not to take me to the hospital, which thankfully they decided against. They proceeded to search my belongings, looking for drugs. They found the syringe I'd used the day before. Being an ex-junkie this was a very bad thing for my roommates to find.
I woke up the next morning thinking 'Ah, what a refreshing sleep.' I went to the bathroom to piss and my roommate walked up the stairs to confront me. 'What the fuck were you on last night?' 'What do you mean?' 'You don't remember what happened? We were in your room trying to wake you up for 15 minutes. You were hardly breathing, and when we did finally wake you up you could hardly talk. We were about to take you to the hospital.' '... I don't remember...' He then went into his room and brought back the syringe. 'What's this? What, are you shooting up again?' 'No.' 'Then what the fuck do you need this for?' 'I don't know, I don't remember.' He then rolled his eyes and walked away. I asked 'What happened?' He said nothing and walked downstairs. I followed him down and after a while of awkward silence amongst me and my roommates, they told me what happened.
I didn't injure myself or anyone else, but I've fucked up the trust I had just started to get back with my roommates by taking that syringe and getting extremely fucked up in front of them. Now my family is worried that I'm an addict again and they're pressuring me to go into rehab. If I wouldn't have shown them my prescription bottle I would have been kicked out of the house. Things were going so well lately, and now it's all fucked up again. I made a complete fool of myself, scared the shit out of my family, and undid months worth of work to get their trust back in one night. I also made an e-fool out of myself by posting embarrassing things on myspace, facebook, and chatrooms.
This morning I looked in the bottle to see how many pills were left. I was shocked to see there was only 9. I had 25 last night.
This stuff isn't worth the trouble. I've done many, many drugs including very high doses of benzos and alcohol and never had a reaction like this.
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