Citation: ShadowsDancing. "Selegiline Awakens the Middle Aged: An Experience with Selegiline, Hydroxyzine (Vistaril) & Tramadol (exp89912)". Erowid.org. Jul 15, 2015. erowid.org/exp/89912
Family history of depression supports a genetic predisposition for bi-polar manifesting depression. I began taking Vistaril 25mg every evening 3hrs prior to going to bed. This modulated the bi-polar tendency and helped induce drowsiness and good sleep patterns. I began this treatment at age 30 and have followed it for 26 years with great success. At age 40, I added melatonin 3mg one half hour before bed time and this produced more REM sleep and many vivid dreams.
During my early 50s I began to notice a recurrent sense of depression and mental confusion including social phobia, prior to this I had been quite outgoing and enjoyed social interaction. I blame at least part of this on a failed attempt at treating migraines with anti-depressants. I had a history of migraine headaches and at my doctors urging I tried low dose anti-depressants to control the headaches. This was a complete failure for the headaches and I found the anti-depressants caused me to overeat and gave me memory problems.
I stopped the anti-depressants (3 varieties were tried - before I realized the futility of this medical regimen) and felt better without the anti-depressants. Still the social phobia and general anxiety increased and made it difficult to accomplish day to day tasks.
At this point I began using 25mg of Tramadol daily which decreased the depression and anxiety. However I found after 7 days of consecutive use I would have muscle cramps and pain in my arms and legs, that would go away if I discontinued the Tramadol. At one point the pain was severe enough to convince me I had carpal tunnel syndrome, which caused me to try several different special keyboards and wrist braces. I was quite relieved to find that it was merely the Tramadol. I later found this problem could be mitigated by taking .25mg of Xanax along with the Tramadol - amazing no muscle pain whatsover even if I used Tramadol daily for a month.
So the depression was controlled via Tramadol which also helped with social phobias, but the memory was a bit sketchy and certainly some was due to aging and I'm certain some was due to the anti-depressants. I had an amazing memory before using them and now I feel like I've lost a very handy talent.
Selegiline enters the picture here, I began taking 1/4 of a 5mg tablet daily, for four days of the week and noticed an immediate increase in energy and a feeling of general well being as well as clearer thinking and better memory, and being male my libido began to influence my thinking too.
I find taking the Selegiline in the morning right after breakfast is very effective and I now refer to it as 'ambition', as after taking it I find myself enjoying the chores I had been dreading and seeking extra things to do. Its quite amazing, like a light switch for the brain. I no longer use the Tramadol on a regular basis, but do use it 3 or 4 times a month.
I find the Vistaril quite effective in moderating the energy level caused by the Selegiline and in combination with the Melatonin, I am able to sleep normally without awakening during the night and usually sleep 8 hours or so.
I hope to be able to use Selegiline for the rest of my days as it does seem to repeal the mist of age from the mind and restore a more youthful mental state.
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