Citation: quantagy. "Improved Sexual Performance and Connection: An Experience with Damiana & Cannabis (exp90125)". Erowid.org. Sep 14, 2017. erowid.org/exp/90125
Before I go into the details of this experience, here is some pertinent background information. I am a 34 year old married man with a daughter who just recently turned two. She is the single brightest joy in our universe. She is also a highly energetic and needy toddler, who often leaves my wife and I utterly exhausted at the end of the day. Furthermore, like so many couples we have been weathering difficult and stressful economic times -- this past month in particular has been especially dispiriting and difficult. These factors had resulted in a depressingly diminished sex life.
Recently, it occurred to me that for almost the entire past year sex has been more an occasional choice we’d undergo “because we’re supposed to, right?” as opposed to something to look forward to and get excited about. The bliss of losing our egos together and merging seemed like an old story, no longer a part of our lives.
Another factor impacting this predicament, and a highly personal one, is the fact that I’ve battled an unhealthy obsession with pornography for the better half of my young life. In the past year I’d made great progress in this area by going to therapy, attending a support group, and practicing daily meditation in combination with semi-regular use of mushrooms, DMT, and salvia.
I should mention here that my wife, while understanding of my use of entheogens, does not herself partake.
After doing some research into aphrodisiacs, I came upon Damiana. I purchased an ounce from a trusted online vendor.
I decided to try it alone first, to get a sense of its effect. One evening while I had the house to myself I packed a bowl— ½ damiana and ½ cannabis. After smoking I laid down in bed and put on some chill ambient music. What followed was about thirty minutes of auto-eroticizing that culminated in a substantial climax. What struck me most about this, however, was the content of my fantasizing. Unfortunately, my imagination, when aroused in this way, is prone to defaulting to pornographic imagery. On this occasion, however, there was no “pictorial” element whatsoever. Rather, I felt in communion with myself, and my own sexuality (which due to my struggles with porn has often been tainted with feelings of shame and low worth) blossomed in bed with me. It truly felt like “sex with myself”, and upon climax I felt full, peaceful, and content. There was a strong sense of integration, of permitting myself to be overtly sexual and accepting the raw power of my sexuality, without having to guard against it through the use of trivializing, pornographic imagery.
Fast forward to a few days later. After my wife put our daughter to bed, I prepared a pot of Damiana tea using four tea bags I’d emptied and refilled. I also packed the pipe with the ½ and ½ damiana/cannabis mix. I offered my wife a cup, and we drank.
**Note: I did not tell my wife this was intended as an aphrodisiac, nor did I tell her there was damiana mixed in with the cannabis. I wanted to rule out a placebo effect for her experience, to get a true sense of this plant. The nature of our relationship is such that I knew this would in no way upset her when I told her. I would never otherwise advocate giving anything to anyone without being up front about it.**
After a few cups of tea, I sparked the bowl and offered it to her. Afterwards, we watched about 10 minutes of the daily show, before I suggested to her that I give her a back rub. When we got to our bedroom I played some music, lit an aromatherapy candle, you get the idea.
Rather than get into the lurid details of what happened next (but it was lurid, mind you), I will give an overview of the experience. The literature says damiana increased blood flow to the genitals, and all I can say is you better fucking believe it! There was an intense, wet heat between our hips, and every gyration and thrust seemed to pump the heat throughout our bodies, and even passing between our bodies, thus achieving what soon became total boundary break down. Every touch seemed magnified and electric. Grunts, moans, and a kind of primal tongue quasi language spilled from my wife’s lips as they sucked, kissed, and bit at my own.
I was also pleased to see I had total control over my own climax, allowing my wife to have 4 complete orgasms before I finished off. Afterwards, as we lay on our backs panting, I told her about what was in the tea and mixed with the cannabis. She slapped me (good-naturedly) for “drugging” her, and then told me to order more of the stuff online.
So I did. Good stuff!
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