Amanitas - A. pantherina, Passion Flower & Cannabis
Citation: NorCon. "I Was Not in a Body: An Experience with Amanitas - A. pantherina, Passion Flower & Cannabis (exp91078)". Erowid.org. Jun 25, 2018. erowid.org/exp/91078
My cousin and I had purchased the grade A Washington Amanita Muscaria off a recommended website and split the bounty in half, so we may both ideally be on the same level. But to no avail, we had a slight change in consciousness and perhaps a loss of equilibrium. So at this loss, we decided to move up a notch, and try the Amanita Pantherina, reading that they were a stronger trip, that being what we were after.
When they came, we were more than a little excited. I had also been drinking Passion Flower tea, not regularly, but often. The backyard is almost overwhelmed with the vines, so about once a week I cook up a batch of leaves so I may have some tea for the week. It is a great tasting, and very curious tea. It helps a lot with my constant anxiety where cannabis will not, also it helps with my back pain and even helps me sleep through the night.
Well I was preparing for a road trip from San Diego after playing a show with my band at the local venue there on the way back home to Los Angeles. It was a bright idea of mine to eat these mushrooms and trip on the way as my friend/guitarist drove me back. What a trip I was in for.
First it began as an extreme body 'high'. A buzzing feeling in my entire body, and a sense of power, that I could set my mind to something and do it, not extraordinary things, but physically demanding things. I smoked two bowls from an apple, and finished my second cup of Passion Flower tea, and it was time to go.
It started out as very sleepy, probably from the tea and the weed, but I wasn't falling asleep per say, I was more in a dreamy state.
I wasn't falling asleep per say, I was more in a dreamy state.
This is when it started getting weird. We were listening to some metal, which is typical for me so it didn't throw me off. Actually it was the band meshuggah, which I am not exactly a fan of, though I am familiar with the poly metered timing and rhythms they use. But this time as I was listening to them, I was getting lost in the multiple rhythms they are known for. 3 different beats playing, one drums, one lead guitar and bass, the third the rhythm guitar were completely inducing the trip. I soon began fading in and out of multiple consciousnesses. One in the normal world, one in my mind, and one in the multiple rhythms happening. That is when I noticed my body was cold, It was freezing from how much I was unknowingly sweating. So I reached in back and grabbed a piece of clothing to wipe sweat off so I wouldn't receive the cold flashes from the windows being open. This almost forced me to leave one consciousness behind so I may tend to reality and make body comfortable. This caused me to notice my eyesight (or lack thereof). It was like the entire world became a cartoon, not those bright and happy colored cartoons you see people tripping about on T.V. It was more like real life cartoons. Everything had its same colors and principles but it was all softer, no fine lines to define anything. This responsibility of keeping myself sweatless became almost overbearing. I couldn't keep my mind comfortable while trying to keep my body comfortable and likewise, could not keep my body comfortable while tending to the needs of my cycle forming consciousnesses.
Then I became lost. I could no longer control my thought. I was not in a body, I did not have a body. I was only a suspension of thought, but this thought was only pictures, constantly flashing in wherever or whatever I was. It was no longer a mind even, I just was. It was not alarming until I realized I could not control it. Then I tried to stop it and I couldn't. Flashing from thought to thought, I was not only seeing things I knew, but things the world, universe, galaxies knew. I became aware that I was stuck in forever. The idea of forever became the only solidified thing I could comprehend. This idea that no human could comprehend without becoming lost. I started thinking, 'what if someone told you to think of forever?' and that notion would kick off this cycle of thought that would seem endless until something else kicked off another. But all of it ended up being the same thought, FOREVER. Because there was no body, no bodily features, not even a mind. I was simply (or not simply) a consciousness of all. Forever became reality, I was never going to stop seeing what it was because that is what I was, a thought, an idea. This went on for I'm guess about 3 hours, the entire drive from San Diego to L.A.
Once we arrived home, I finally returned to my body.
Once we arrived home, I finally returned to my body.
I immediately left the car, and went into the house, soaked in sweat. I decided I would take a shower to get the grime off, and hopefully come down a little. Well I got clean, but coming down did not happen. The same things kept going, cycles of bodiless thought and a complete lack of sight (everything was a blur, no matter how far away or close, I could not make any lines out). So I took another shower, attempted to get everything I needed, and went to sleep.
Though it was miserable at the time, reflecting on this trip (or mind fuck) I am extremely satisfied with the opening of new consciousness. I remember thinking at the time, I wish this on no one. I would never ask anyone to think of forever. But now looking back, it was quite a thing to be able to comprehend. I never realized that I knew nothing of what forever could be, and I know I have not done a great job of painting the picture of what it was, but maybe that is the trick of it.
These are nothing like Psilocybin mushrooms. Completely different active chemicals, and completely different trips, but thought-provoking, or inducing nonetheless. But have a babysitter.
Thanks for reading, and enjoy
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