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Seeing Myself From Within
Cacti - T. pachanoi & Cannabis
by Rory
Citation:   Rory. "Seeing Myself From Within: An Experience with Cacti - T. pachanoi & Cannabis (exp94030)". Erowid.org. Dec 28, 2022. erowid.org/exp/94030

 
DOSE:
14 in oral Cacti - T. pachanoi (tea)
    repeated smoked Cannabis  
BODY WEIGHT: 120 lb
I've always been really stoked that I live in the place I do. Where I live at, it's pretty much impossible to not find drugs. In this place, there are many drugs at my reach such as speed, meth, weed, PCP, cocaine, and of course mescaline. There are also many free- growing daturas and morning glory plants but those are another story. 

Anyways, I read up on mescaline and decided that it was something that I had to try. Luckily, one of my neighbors had a massive 8ft San Pedro cactus growing in his front yard. I politely asked him if I could take a 14 inch cutting to which he happily said yes. I think he knew what I wanted it for. I took this massive cutting home and began the preparation. I de-spined it and removed the waxy outer layer, the chopped it up into little pieces and blended it. The product was taken and boiled with water until there was only a bit of liquid at the bottom of the pot. 

I poured the liquid into a jug and popped it in the freezer. The next day I thawed out the solution and began to drink it down. This was perhaps the most disgusting thing I have ever tasted. I began to gag after the first gulp and it became extremely hard to keep drinking. With hard work, I managed to get it all down without vomiting. I had planned to spend my trip in my home when my friend (we'll call him L) called me and asked if I wanted to split a few grams of weed and maybe go hang out at the mall. I thought what the hell and said yes. L arrived at my home shortly after with his sister. L was already stoned so his sister drove him over. I smoked some weed too and then we were off to the mall.

By the time we arrived at the mall it had been an hour and thirty minutes since I had consumed the drink. L and I decided to go play computer games until we sobered up. I had begun to feel the mescaline kick in before our smoke session. While I was high, I was enjoying the games, but when the weed wore off was when shit got bad. I soon realized that the gaming atmosphere was not one to trip in. I grew extremely fearful and felt scared of everything around me. I knew for sure that the mescaline had taken a turn for the worse. I never thought that it would make me realize all the freaky shit that it did. I looked deep inside myself and saw all the things about me that I don't like.

The realizations were scary because they were all so true and real and I couldn't deny any of them. They were all too personal to even write down. But trust me, that shit was brutal. I decided that I would stop playing the violent video games and began to walk around the mall. I ended up in a music store and searched for some cool new music. The nausea began so I tried to keep my mind busy by walking around and looking at all the shops. Then I grew weary of my surroundings as my mind screamed for me to go home.
I grew weary of my surroundings as my mind screamed for me to go home.
I was frightened beyond belief and I felt that I had finally fucked my brain with my drug use. Knowing that I couldn't leave until L's sister came to pick us up, I sucked it up and returned to where L was. 

I actually ran into a few friends that I know but I was in no condition to interact so I said hi and went back to my computer. I went to YouTube and searched for soothing songs which actually did help. The nausea wore away and kept my fears at bay. I was giddy at times, I was rude, I was just in another world. I then began to look at L and I was disgusted. For some reason his entire personality was sickening to me and I couldn't believe he was one of my best friends. To this day, I don't quite look at him the same way. We still had a good amount of weed and but we decided not to smoke it. 

It had now been 9 hours since I had taken the drink and I finally felt myself coming down. At this time I was relaxed and calm as I shot zombies. L's sister finally came for us and during the drive, I was the calmest dude in the world. All seemed to be good in my life. I arrived home with a big bag of weed and tired body. I made some tea, reflected on my experience, and went to bed early. I slept well and woke refreshed the next day. 

Overall, I enjoyed the mescaline and was very pleased with the results I got. I realize the atmosphere was not right for this substance and I do plan on doing it again in the future. But, everything will be right next time. This experience was very eye opening and made me see myself just a little differently.  I hope I learn more next time and happy tripping to everyone else. 

Exp Year: 2009ExpID: 94030
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 23
Published: Dec 28, 2022Views: 251
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Cannabis (1), Cacti - T. pachanoi (64) : Combinations (3), First Times (2), Public Space (Museum, Park, etc) (53)

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