Citation: Karcinogenious. "The God Inside: An Experience with 25C-NBOMe & 4-AcO-DMT (exp94762)". Erowid.org. Feb 6, 2012. erowid.org/exp/94762
I poured 32mg of 4-Aco-DMT into a glass of Sprite and prepped 600mcg of 25C-NBOMe for nasal administration while the 4AcO dissolved. I sprayed the liquid NBOMe solution into my nose and chased it with the now dissolved psychedelic Sprite cocktail. My intent was to experience a strong tryptamine phenethylamine combo and see how far I could push it. Also I was trying to gain some confidence on a few issues and work a few things out. I accomplished all these goals and then some.
For me NBOMe is the quickest psychedelic come up I've experienced (with the exception of DMT), and the method of administration (nasally) obviously helps quite a bit too, this time was no exception. Within 10 minutes the NBOMe is coming on strong, everything is breathing and wiggling and my mind and body feel like how a rocket might feel before take off. In the next 25 or 30 minutes the 4AcO made its effects known, and there was no denying the tryptamine-induced, jewel-encrusted world I was now in. Time essentially creeped to a halt at around this point and I knew I needed to go lay down. I laid down in my bedroom with my dog sprawled out on my lap. I laid there for at least 2 hours as I was ushered through one of the most perfect and happy psychedelic states I have ever experienced.
At the hour and a half mark things were definitely at their peak. I was consumed, and looking out the bedroom door and into the living room, the world seemed like an explosion of color. Some colors I struggled to put a name on, the things I saw were not of this world, they were nonphysical. More powerful and more important than visual manifestations in my opinion was the wonderful mind state I was now settled into.
I swear I have never been happier in my entire life, I smiled so big and for so long that my face hurt all day afterwards. I had some serious pressure from my college schedule at the moment and was seriously doubting my intelligence and ability to get through this semester. I went into the trip with the intent to eliminate those doubtful and anxiety ridden thoughts I couldn't shake any other way, and thankfully it did the trick and then some. I don't want to attribute anxiety relief completely to the drugs though, I find that psychedelics make it easier to do work on yourself, probably how meditation allows others to work on themselves in such a way. I feel like it does this by letting the person look at himself or herself in a new perspective.
I felt like this was the most essential psychedelic breakthrough experience and I felt integrated with the whole. At this point, I understood something I have always failed to grasp. I suddenly realized the purpose of life since there seems to be no real practical purpose. The god that is in all of us and the god that created all of this is one and the same. God created life simply to let itself experience an infinite possibility of life. By dispersing god's own conciousness into billions upon billions of souls, god can experience all facets of reality and take in the brevity of possible experience, and especially love. At this point I closed my eyes and covered my face up with the blanket, turning the already dim room to pitch black. I had the sensation of flying or floating, I felt weightless.
I looked around and was surrounded on all sides by semitransparent black glass-like interwoven tubes flowing with some sort of bright grey liquid substance. I felt as if I was supported by these structures, it felt very inviting and safe there. I continually had the suspicion that someone or something was there, and I felt like I was being watched. My suspicions were confirmed as two entities, exactly identical to ones I have seen in previous DMT trips, made themselves visible in front of me. Continuously rotating diamond-like objects made up their bodies, it was clearly of a texture nonphysical, it was breathtaking.
Another entity appeared from in between them and I felt a message, not telepathically really, I just knew, this was god, the everything. It turned its head towards me and I was in total shock and disbelief. It looked exactly like me, same height, same face, the only difference was the body was made of the same light-like material the other entities were composed of. Shocked, I opened my eyes and was back in my bed surrounded by furniture and walls layered with light and colors of every possible formulation. I realized right then god is nothing more than each of us, without our brain to filter out the reality that exists beyond the physical realm, and then I instantly felt comfortable with death. Knowing that all death will be is freedom from the body, and reintegration with the whole, to be immortal, and maybe possibly go onto live another life in another world. Or who knows what will really happen, no one knows until they're there, and it really is the most exciting and beautiful mystery of life.
I tripped for a total of 7 or 8 hours maybe, and I had possibly the best trip I have ever experienced. I never once lost control and was in total ecstasy the entire time. I had many revelations during this trip, the spiritual one was quite beautiful and made me smile bigger than I have in years. Another idea I had though, as simple as this may be, was about the meaning of life. I realized life is simple, you just find that person who loves you back, learn how to relax, then die. I felt this idea was so profound I had to write it down, I knew it was simple but the thought of my perfect girlfriend and my perfect life, to be followed by eternal peace as a DMT-light-being after death, it all was so beautiful, I had figured it all out.
But like all trip-induced revelations, the following day reading the words they seem simple and don't mean as much. I was happy yes, but there is no way during normal brain function to feel as happy as I was in that state. It is acceptance of life and death, it is instant peace and total understanding of the universe and of the soul.
It waits for each of us after death.
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