DOSE: T+ 0:00	16 seeds	oral	Cacao	(ground / crushed)
T+ 2:00	20 mg	insufflated	MDMA	(powder / crystals)
T+ 2:00	20 mg	oral	MDMA	(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

155 lb

This is the one and only time I will ever try this experience. Two hours before consuming the MDMA, I crushed 16 cacao beans, placed them in water, boiled the soup, and added raw honey, ginger and cinnamon to flavor and drank it down. Feels nice:-)

Approximately two hours after ingestion of all the liquid containing bits of cacao, I insufflated 20 mg MDMA and ate the other 20 mg. I am very familiar with both tools, and use cacao three times a week, and MDMA about twice a year. I trust the source of the MDMA, it was white crystalline and this batch reminded me of the feeling when it was still legal.

I had the intention of making music to score a short film and wanted an extra bit of empathic energy to influence the music. Within 15 minutes of having consumed the MDMA, I noticed that the normally racy thoughts associated with the MDMA climb was accompanied with a general shakiness throughout the constitution of my body accompanied with some anxiety. The anxiety increased over a 20-25 minutes and climaxed with a serious fear as the shakiness of my frame was noticed by others. I felt weak, and felt as if I had a flu and was shaky as if I had the flu for days at this point. I felt the serotonin flood into my brain and the shakiness remained.

As the anxiety waned, I was reading frantically on the internet to see if in fact cacao is an MAOI (well knowing the grizzly details of MAOIs mixed with MDMA). As I am normally very sensitive to caffeine, yet can drink cacao right before bed without a problem, I related the shakiness being akin to a high-dose psilocybe trip (> 5 grams) or having three cups of coffee (which is two cups too many for a non-drinker like me). I was able to concentrate, had not lost my ability to walk or talk, but I was definitely not 100%.

At roughly the 50 minute mark, I could definitely identify the feeling with MDMA, but an anxious shake remained in my mind and body which lasted for well over three and a half hours. I felt flush in my face and arms , similar to 50 mg of niacin but not as burning as niacin. At this point I started wondering if I had any cannabis around the house to use for controlling this anxiety. As I was looking for cannabis, I noticed that my lips were slightly numb, something which I only felt once before after having accidentally consumed trace amounts of tetrodotoxin (another long story there). So I knew that there was some toxin produced by the combination of cacao and MDMA, maybe a metabolite? I thought that the shakiness and flush would remain long after the MDMA should have lasted, it did not. Keep in mind, I had barely a mere threshold dose of MDMA. Had I eaten 125 mg, or a more therapeutic dose, I realize now that would have been a very bad scenario. The flush moved into my chest at around 1.5 hours past the MDMA ingestion, and at that point it began to feel like the ingestion of a few inches of San Pedro cactus. This made me wonder if there wasn't something in the cacao which made the MDMA sway more onto the side of a phenethylamine rather than an amphetamine.

At the 2 hour point, past the MDMA ingestion, the shakiness remained but was very low in the sensorium, and I felt like I should be feeling less of the MDMA since I only took a threshold dose. Nonetheless I was definitely on a slow roll with the MDMA and still had a slight anxiety akin to when I am wondering when the caffeine will wear off when I have had too much. Strangely, my movements slowed down, and I exhibited more trepidation with every movement. This was entirely a mental phenomena, as nobody else seemed to notice, however I did seem to be consciously moving slower than everyone around me. It isn't like I thought I would bang my head or stub my toe, it is just like it took longer to set into motion each action which I decided upon. I decided that I was down around the 4 hour point, but couldn't shake the fact that I felt a little displaced from my body. Still not 100 % within my constitution and my lips felt warm and swollen from the inside but looked no different.

In conclusion, cacao is definitely a drug. Although I have not found myself addicted to it (and I have assayed that potential over the past 5 years since I first found the beans) I do know that when I drink it for an entire week, by the end of the week I no longer get that warm, sense of well being normally associated with cacao. I never feel well being with chocolate, only cacao. Having never used it before a DMT journey, I really cannot say if it is in fact an MAOI. I can't even find literature which definitely identifies cacao as an MAOI. Jonathan Ott at one point believed cacao might be a mild MAOI, but again the jury is still deliberating. However, when combined with MDMA, I am assuming that the methylxanthene molecules contained within cacao are incompatible with the action potential of MDMA. I did receive a few leg fasciculations the next morning, which I have noticed follow days when too much caffeine is consumed, or amphetamines were taken. And no, the cannabis did not reduce the anxiety when I did find some.

I did not like the feeling of this combination for at least 3 and a half hours after consuming the MDMA, and the last half-hour or so I at least came to terms with the fact that I was not going to die right then and there. I would not even suggest this combination for thrill seeking, as one would be too weak to want to do anything, and I don't know anyone who enjoys feeling anxious. I never had those epic psychedelic moments of re-birth when I did eventually try and relax into and surrender to the feeling of the combination, as there was no life assessment or viewing priorities from a different perspective. So, I don't think this combination would work for psychotherapy. I think this combination is not useful at all.

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 95891
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 40
Published: Dec 4, 2018	Views: 2,925
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MDMA (3), Cacao (638) : Difficult Experiences (5), Music Discussion (22), Performance Enhancement (50), Combinations (3), Alone (16)