DOSE:

3 hits

oral

LSD

(liquid)

BODY WEIGHT:

135 lb

I've been using LSD for many years now .... mostly recreational use up until recent years. By a chance circumstance I found myself tripping home alone one night (something I never would before that night have done purposely). It quickly became clear to me that acid has so much more to show a person than just some fun visuals. But, as far as I thought I went that first night, I felt like I had only just knocked on the door. That night started a journey through that door that over the course of several more trips I did finally achieve. What I'm going to share is the culmination of several trips' experience in a more meditative mindset.

I cleaned my apartment thoroughly the night before and went to bed early. It was a bright and very cold winter morning. After taking care of personal matters and informing the appropriate parties of my intended activities for the day, I ate my acid-laced Oreo. It was around 10 a.m. I showered immediately and by the time I was drying myself off the walls were already breathing ... heavily. Now, although there are plenty noteworthy aspects of this trip pre and post peak, I'm only going to share the peak as this was the moment the door shattered.

My experience with ego death was a truly humbling one ......

As I stood there, my soul stripped of its worldly shackles, head cocked to the sky, and palms open, I was gently ripped open in the most pleasant way from the inside out and exposed completely. Every ounce of my being was laid bare for judgment. I was immediately flooded with the most intensely overwhelming love I had ever felt. Tears of joy streamed down my face. Another entity approached me. It was a ball of light, as was I now as well. 'Me' actually consisted of three or four balls of light, suspended in the ether, and surrounded by even brighter light (this brighter light was also the love I was feeling and the only thing I could see). This other entity then inspected me like the scanner in a copying machine scans a document. This kind of inspection was instinctively terrifying but only for a split second because as my 'self' was exposed all fears melted away. Upon realizing the 'self' was an illusion manufactured by the presence of space/time, all worldly worries, despair, hopes and joys simply melted away. None of it mattered. There was a greater sense of importance, but this was something else that was far less tangible, or speakable.

So as this was happening, the second entity communicated to me 'You're not dead yet, but I'm going to show you something anyway'. It then smeared me across the universe until I had become one with everything. I was able to perceive time as it really is, as a whole. I became momentarily infinite and as I wrote later that day in my journal I experienced ' .... everything. All at once'. Feeling that level of connection revealed to me that the momentary physical object I call me is nothing more than an agent for experience and although this body will eventually decay its experiences will not. Death, like life, is merely an illusion. I'm sure this is the kind of thing some people might call god, but I'm hesitant in labeling it like that. It was a spiritual experience hands down .... an incredibly intense one that changed me profoundly. During moments of clarity throughout this day I was compelled to write in my journal. This was a difficult task because I was also slightly out-of-body making my hand very shaky. I'll end this with the words I managed to write down:

'you realize that the minds physical connection to the world is not the only connection it has.

self is exposed. and gone. ego matters not. love overwhelming ....... Everything. All at once.'

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 95970
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: Sep 9, 2019	Views: 769
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LSD (2) : Alone (16), Entities / Beings (37), Mystical Experiences (9)