Citation: Logangus. "'This..isn't...what....I.. woonntedd...': An Experience with Salvia Divinorum (10x Extract) (exp96415)". Erowid.org. Jun 13, 2012. erowid.org/exp/96415
Background: I have been taking no medications or other drugs except cannabis.
I had taken Salvia once before and turned into a piece of plastic that was sideways. It was an interesting experience and I wanted to continue exploring this plant. I bought some 10x from a smoke shop.
Setting: A clearing on the lower part of my property, in the woods. I was feeling pretty neutral and a bit excited to try this (relatively) new drug. I was in general pretty cavalier about the whole thing because I was going to take a low dose and I had done it before. ...Not such a good idea!
I had read that Salvia should be respected and can be quite powerful, so I decided to take a low dose. I had read that .03g was a low level dose. I weighed it out, and then just to be safe I only took half the pile. I lit it and took it in one hit.
Moments later, I started to feel slight effects and was excited.
Suddenly I found myself standing a few feet to the right and I was crippled. Whoa! Something is very wrong! I can only feel half my body! uuuuhhhhh... It felt very REAL. Not dreamy at all but like my Real body had really been crippled and now was only half there.
I felt an immense pressure or weight pulling me dowwnnn... it was hard to resist. I was starting to feel like I had gotten more than I wanted by far! I had only been hoping for some threshold effects.
'Noo... I didn't want this...' I muttered, maybe mentally.
...you wanted this..... came the whispered reply.
'This..isn't...what....I.. woonntedd...' I murmered as I drooped. The word wonted seemed so strange, almost like it had no meaning.
My dog had walked off into the bushes and now I felt her as a presence that was more human than dog. I felt that there were real presences there with me. I felt as if the whole world was telescoping into this world I had been before on acid or mushrooms, where everything is very different. Difficult to explain. Something like: My thoughts can be heard and create the world around me, Everything is a human, the bird is as smart as a human and is watching me, everything seems to be revolving around me. Reaching out to me. Trying to suck me in, though it seems to have good intentions and that I would enjoy this place. Kind of like a really horny girl trying to seduce me. It's very strange and completely different from our world. Every fundamental rule is broken. I.e. things can exist inside of other things, my body is the same as that dog and its thoughts, everything is imaginary, those kinds of rules. Completely out of this reality.
Everything seemed to be a symbol of what it was in my life. I didn't like that because it was SO different from our world, it was blowing my mind. How could this be possible?
I felt like I had been tricked. I thought back: I had been told to respect Salvia, yet I had taken an unknown dose, I had been 'that guy'. I viewed my old life like a dock that had taken me to this place, and how 'that guy''s actions had brought me here. I was so foolish!
I was now leaning over halfway. 'It's a little like melting' I said to myself. The world seemed to have been cut in two or reduced to only the bottom half. I realized the leaf I was looking at had been bitten off... oh no... In desperation I looked at another leaf hoping that what I was thinking wasn't true... but it was bitten off too. Everything was bitten off.
Noo...this can't be true...
I was bitten off.
At this point I managed to remember that something was going on and stood up to figure it out.
Holy crap, this was the Salvia! This stuff was powerful! 'It's ok, you just took Salvia' I muttered to myself. I was glad to have myself as a trip guide and helpful influence. I couldn't believe that this stuff was sold in smoke shops. Anyone could take it! Holy crap... I continued talking to myself as I wandered back to the outdoor table where my pipe was resting.
There are some deep levels here! I thought. Good thing I took a low dose!!
This had been about 5 minutes tops. I still felt pretty profound effects and though my dog had pretty much returned to being a dog, I felt like I was still in this Symbol World. A car drove by and it was a Symbol, of thefear I feel when someone drives by that they will discover my drug use. It was placed there specifically to frighten and mess with me. This world I had (re)discovered was the true world,and showed me how my old regular world was just what I got from my choices. At this point I wanted to go into the woods to help myself recuperate from what was a bit of a mind-rape. I
set my pipe down and was not satisfied that it was hidden well enough so I moved it, all the while aware of the symbolism of this and how it showed that I was scared.
I went into the woods and gradually calmed down and regained baseline after about an hour, though for that time I had a feeling like I just wanted to escape and shut off.
The main things about this experience were the feeling of having too much, the mindfuck of the Symbol World, and the intense and very real physical effects. I want to emphasize that it did not feel like I have some dream body that's being warped in half, but that my real physical body is. It for that reason felt like being crippled because my body thought half of itself was gone and knows that's not something you can survive.
All in all it was a scary experience and a great teaching experience. I felt like I had received a well-deserved slap on the wrist for being careless with this powerful drug.
I knew I would never be so careless again. Since then I have been experimenting with SMALL amounts of Salvia and finding it enjoyable. I plan to chew some and see if that is a gentler and more pleasant experience. Basically, the moral here is:
Don't F*ck with Salvia!
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