DOSE:

50 mg

smoked

DMT

BODY WEIGHT:

150 lb

I just had my first experience with dmt -dimethyltryptamine. The most powerful entheogen occurring on this earth. I have wanted it for years, and well, finally it is so. I'm going to attempt to write about it -but I know words will fail me.

I really had to build up the nerve. I found myself sitting there, heart racing, tentative -afraid. One can read about and discuss an experience, but idea and experience are..worlds apart. Can one truly prepare to get shot out of a cannon? I just was.

After meditating and asking whatever was out there to show me, that I was ready to see..I finally worked up the courage and loaded 50mg into the oiler-style pipe and then inhaled the sharp smoke, which stabbed into my lungs and before the second inhale had escaped my lips the room around me dissolved, or tore apart. Not in any conventional sense, like a wave takes down a sandcastle or a mirror shattering on a cold tile floor..it was like..minute vibrations grew monumental and took everything.

I was terrified. I have never felt anything so intense and so alien..I had the fear but it was so fast, so intense, there was no real way to rationalize or process it. There was no thought. I was ripped apart. I watched myself, outside of myself. There was no self. I watched myself die. I watched my body decompose as the universe spun rapidly around me and that is when I let go of the fear.

I let go of myself and I let go of everything and that is when I felt the presence of this..energy..this guide of sorts…not quite an entity..but an overwhelmingly positive presence..It showed me the way back..It gave me back my self..my body was an orgasm, a full body, head to toe orgasm..A shower of elation..I had come back with the knowledge, with the key..I had seen and felt and heard and died and risen and I began laughing, with tears in my eyes I laughed aloud in my quiet room and I said “thank you” over and over again and I sat back with my eyes closed and watched the universe at work..overlapping, spinning, blooming layers and fields of energy and I grinned. Not a grin like one would laugh at a joke..a grin that is uncontrollable..a grin that would show one's face has been ripped off and put back together in a different plane of existence.

I feel unshackled. I feel free. This may be the silly afterglow of the drug..but maybe I know the joy of having the key to the universe jangling around in my pocket. I was taken out of myself, turned inside out and re-assembled and here I am now. And my eyes are open.

Exp Year: 2012	ExpID: 98311
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 25
Published: Mar 5, 2018	Views: 940
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DMT (18) : General (1), First Times (2), Hangover / Days After (46), Unknown Context (20)