DOSE:	1 hit	oral	MDMA
		smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

125 lb

I had been planning to go to this concert with one of my roommates from freshman year for about two weeks. The artist was a dubstep DJ named Minnesota, and I had been following his music for quite some time. I am rather new to the live show scene, so I felt I should drag her along with me just to have someone I knew there. She ultimately ended up bailing on me. Lucky for me a high school acquaintance was there so I ended up tagging along with her and her friends at the start of the night. When she called and told me she was in the parking lot, I popped my tab of molly and headed over to her car. As we were mingling in the parking lot, I smoked a roach that my brother had saved for me. I figured this would help me keep my mind off waiting for the pill to kick in.

I had a pretty good buzz by the time we got in the venue. My acquaintance- I will call her Sally- her friends kept moving around the venue- going to the balcony to smoke, the bathroom, talking with her festival friends- and I felt exceedingly awkward following her around. About twenty minutes in I was basically by myself in the middle of the floor jamming to some opening act that I’d never heard of. The venue was rather empty which was expected- it was relatively early and most people just show up late to catch the headliner. About 15 minutes into my solo jam session, my former roommate finally showed up- she was overdressed and brought a posh friend with her.

The molly had kicked in by then- I kept fiddling with my fingers, my foot felt like it was sparkling into the floor (for lack of a better way description), dancing felt amazing and I had a permanent smile plastered to my face. I could not help but bounce and move my head around to the bass- and my roommate and her friend found this quite amusing. I attempted to make conversation with them, but my sentences were not making much since. I gave up conversation and continued dancing solo. Normally I would never go out alone, especially somewhere that involved dancing and a large amount of people. I am very awkward sober. However, I hadn’t a care in the world. I didn’t care if my old roommate and her friend were laughing at me, I didn’t care if I was dancing weird, and I talked to strangers with ease. In fact, there was this beautiful blond boy next to me with the most luscious head of hair, and I felt compelled to tell him how beautiful his hair was. I did and surprisingly he immediately gave me a hug. It felt like my torso was oozing into his. We got into a conversation about a recent music festival that we attended, and after a few minutes, he went to find his friend who had abandoned him. By now, my roommate had left and I was near the front of the stage dancing my ass off. There was a rap duo performing, and I guess I was looking at one of them googly eyed because he started rapping directly at me for a good while. I was smiling bigger than I’ve ever smiled before and dancing with a newfound purpose. However, after I few seconds of eye contact, I’d decided that I could not handle such attention and hid behind someone next to me. I’d realized as I was staring at the performer my eyes were wiggling.

After I moved away from the front of the stage, I felt a wave of heat rush over me. I noticed that my heart was also beating extremely fast. Luckily, there were water canisters on each side of the room. I got a drink of water and wandered alone to the bathroom. My pupils were fully dilated and I took great amusement in this. I decided I’d force myself to pee, just to see if it was really as hard as I’d read. Not at all! By now, my jaws were clenching like crazy, so I decided to chew some gum. I made friends with a girl in the bathroom who talked about how much she liked my hair and my bottle cap earrings. I thought she was the sweetest thing in the world. I had many instances where I’d have short conversations with random people and at the end I’d hug them, tell them how nice they were and how much I liked them. To my surprise when I came out, I saw two familiar faces. They showed up late when it was time for the opening act. Finally, I had people to dance with. We made small talk- I wasn’t really good at holding conversations all night because the music would distract me and I would feel compelled to stop what I was saying and just dance. Someone dropped a glow stick on my head and it was like a gift from god. I picked it off the ground and it was like my magic wand for the entire night. Normally I’d be super aware of myself- wondering if I was dancing properly, wondering if people were looking at me, wondering if I was out of place (I’m typically one of the only black people at shows like these so I stick out like a sore thumb )- but none of that mattered. I danced like a mad woman and forgot that the two girls were even there for the majority of the night.

The whole night was like a solo dance party with random people popping in and out for meaningless conversations and hugs. I was very sad when the show ended- it was literally the happiest time of my life. I arranged for my brother to pick me up in case I didn’t feel okay to drive home, but by now, it had been at least four hours since I took the pill and I definitely was not at my peak anymore. My driving was not affected in the slightest- I actually felt more cautious (Driving on drugs is bad though so don’t do it!). When I got home, I went on and on to my brother about how the show was the most beautiful thing, I’d ever experienced. And 5 days later, I still believe it was. In fact, the next day as I was listening to Minnesota when I was doing my coursework, one of the songs came of that was played the night before- and my eyes welled up. I was literally on the verge of crying out of happiness. I have never felt so filled with love.

This whole report may sound corny, but it does not even explain a fragment of the joy that I felt. I have never felt so free and happy my entire life.

Exp Year: 2012	ExpID: 98335
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 20
Published: Nov 12, 2019	Views: 593
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MDMA (3) : Rave / Dance Event (18), Glowing Experiences (4)