Citation: Riza. "Complete Ego Death - Heaven Hell and the Matrix: An Experience with 2C-I & Methoxetamine (exp99444)". Erowid.org. Nov 20, 2016. erowid.org/exp/99444
I preloaded with 5 HTP and Vitamin C, and postloaded with 5 HTP, Vitamin C, and L-Tyrosine.
My first experience was really great at 10 mg 2c-I insufflated and 20 mg MXE oral with 10 mg bump every hour to 2 hours for a total of 70 mg lasting 12 hours. The 2c-I was not very profound during this trip apart from the beginning before the MXE kicked in. I feel like the MXE mellowed the 2c-I out and I had a really great, relaxed, controlled trip. It was very enjoyable, and I just had a great feeling of content and peace. There was a long lasting feeling of well-being for over a week after this trip...although nothing too crazy or profound happened during this trip.
Now with only a slight tweak in dosage (and I believe more potent MXE) I experienced COMPLETE EGO DEATH. I did 10 mg 2c-I rectally (I know, but I really hate snorting it!), 5 mg 2c-I snorted (I could tolerate this small amount), and 30 mg MXE (with no redose!). I remember lying down and when I woke up after a while I really thought I had died...I accepted the fact, and begin to ascend through these levels like a video game which got more and more intense and more and more psychedelic...I feel like I experienced everything and had the most beautiful visions/visuals I have ever encountered (similar to amazing fractals and heavenly vision art I have seen on the internet)-and they were very real. At points I was a god, a ball of light, some strange electrical entity, electricity--there were points where I had fully discovered the matrix, and traveled through it.
Eventually (after about 4-5 hours) I woke up, but was still very much tripping-I thought I was one of the few human survivors left behind after a massive escape from the matrix - like I was a martyr left to distract all that was to destroy mankind and somehow make it back to the rest of the human species. I experienced heaven, hell, death, birth, robotic states, animal states. At one point I spoke to a friend on skype, and I swear he was an artificially intelligent program that was glitching and playing recorded responses...
At one point I went outside and could see the framework of the universe as well as the physical environment reacting to my thoughts-like I was controlling rain, wind, and animals. I seriously think I was in my own controlled universe--but this was my real body walking around. I would NOT have been able to handle this had I not had a lot of experience in the past with strong doses of psychedelics (LSD-trips ranging from 2-8 hits, DMT, 5-Meo-DMT - ego death but not as long or profound as the MXE/2c-I, psilocybin-doses from half-eight to a quarter, 2c-I alone with largest dose being 30 mg oral, MXE alone-10-20 mg doses with redosing every 1-2 hours, salvia 50x). The reason I list all of these is because I feel I was able to take every experience I've had, including general life experiences to survive this trip...it really took a strong mindset and took a lot out of me. I felt weak after the trip, and scared like a baby.
The day after I was thankful for all that I have and have a very gentle approach to life. I feel stronger and stronger gradually while maintaining my ego. Maintaining the ego is most important, because a trip will PUNISH me if I don't. Respect all that is holy, the drug the universe, energy, and the reason we are here--to be an ever flowing energy.
I postloaded with 5 HTP, Vitamin C, and L-Tyrosine.
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