Support accurate info and harm reduction.
Donate $50+ and get a Know Your DrugsData tee
Changed My Life
Mushrooms - P. cubensis
by Anonymous
Citation:   Anonymous. "Changed My Life: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. cubensis (exp105323)". Erowid.org. May 20, 2020. erowid.org/exp/105323

 
DOSE:
7 g oral Mushrooms - P. cubensis (dried)

BODY WEIGHT: 135 lb


Just over 10 years ago, I had my first encounter with mushrooms. This was my first encounter with any of these special plants, and I had previously only been exposed to pot.

Back then, I was in a shitty situation, living with my parents and having no job, and no hope of anything positive in the future. I was heading to be a burden on the tax system. There was simply no hope of ever having a normal life, as I was stricken by a major depression that had lasted years, and lost social contact with almost everyone. I had zero self esteem, and had been hospitalized for suicide attempts, and put on anti-depressants and tranqs, though only for a short time.

One day, one of my only friends informed me that he had a half ounce of mushrooms. I was always interested in seeing the colours they had to offer, so I said sure, I'll try them. We ate them and took a walk in the woods at night.

To make a long story short, I had the full mushroom experience. Visionary sequences, kaleidoscopes, communication with alien beings, total loss of self, total loss of contact with sanity, shapes that make sounds as they grow. Visions of mushrooms spreading spores everywhere. Metallic grids in outer space I was sure I was schizophrenic for life. It wasn't really a pleasant experience, and it was mostly difficult and dark.

The most important thing the mushrooms did for me was to show me the ugly truth. They let me see who I really was, and how everyone else saw me. They made me realize I was a loser, heading nowhere good, and that if I didn't change I was absolutely screwed.
They made me realize I was a loser, heading nowhere good, and that if I didn't change I was absolutely screwed.
Shortly after this experience, I got a job, and moved out on my own. Eventually I would go on to college, and find a girlfriend, as well as start a successful career. I have travelled, and I have experienced many amazing things, even some other special plants in their native setting.

I can say wholeheartedly that I would not be where I am today without mushrooms. I would never have realized what kind of situation I was in, and I never would have had the fear put in me to change.

Exp Year: 2004ExpID: 105323
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 20 
Published: May 20, 2020Views: 468
[ View as PDF (for printing) ] [ View as LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Switch Colors ]
Mushrooms - P. cubensis (66) : Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Depression (15), First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17)

COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


Experience Vaults Index Full List of Substances Search Submit Report User Settings About Main Psychoactive Vaults