DOSE: T+ 0:00	1	oral	Mushrooms	(edible / food)
T+ 0:35		smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

142 lb

Avoiding Bad Trips

My intentions in writing this report is to offer some information about badtrips, and how to turn them around into good trips and how to avoid them all together. I would never want anybody to undergo an experience similar to my badtrip; but have managed to learn a great deal from this badtrip as opposed to letting it deter me from further hallucinagen use. I have used strong hallucinagens about thirty times since and have never had a bad experience because I identified the problems in my one bad trip.

Undergoing a hallucinagen trip is a serious experience, it is intense, it makes me more emotional, it does put me in a position where a negative experience could trigger many emotions. Thus the first step to having a good trip is planning, and to plan correctly knowing my substance.

Most of my mistakes were made in planning; I had done mushrooms before but didn't know enough about them to make a wise decision on what to do during my mushroom trip. My mistake in the planning was that I planned everything, expecting that whatever I wanted to happen would happen: I wanted to go to a cliff over some water with two friends, eat mushrooms, smoke joints, go diving into water, and then return to my friends house and see his parents three hours later.

Well in my past experience with mushrooms the intensity had ended after three hours so I figured that I'd feel fine and normal after three hours... BIG MISTAKE.... This just put pressure on me to comedown... And once I've started tripping, the mushrooms don't let me comedown until I want to.

My second mistake was in mindset, I was only fourteen years old at the time and was undergoing some emotional problems. I had recently had bad news about my family and was not yet diagnosed with a medium level depression. I also was using drugs and alcohol very dangerously at the time, and was in a depressed haze most of the time.

My third mistake was setting; this could be part of my first section of planning, but I mean, taking magic mushrooms on the ledge of a cliff that is seven metres high was plain stupid.

My fourth mistake wasn't that serious, I chose to trip with two friends who I wasn't very close with, but would call them friends. I think it would've been better to trip with someone I trusted and knew better.

So without further ado this is what happened to me on the day when I used magic mushrooms carelessly:

It was early afternoon, right after lunch. I skipped lunch because I knew the magic mushrooms would work better... So I'd estimate at about 1:00 I dosed on a chocolate shroom.

1:00- reflection, taking shrooms in chocolate isn't a very good idea. Firstly, you never know who's been touching the chocolate and handling it with dirty fingers, secondly you never know how old the chocolate is, and thirdly you don't know how many shrooms you've just eaten... In this case I'd guess this chocolate contained 3grams, which is a bit much for an inexperienced shroomer. So, another lesson can be learned here; know your dose, estimate your tolerance, and know or trust where you're getting your drugs from.

1:05- I ate the chocolate right around my parents, thus I'd stressed myself out, I'd given myself a time limit, I had to get away from them and to my destination in twenty-forty minutes before my shrooms started working. It's always best to take your mushrooms in the place you plan to trip so you have time to relax and get comfortable, yet another mistake I made.

1:15- feeling excited, waiting for the mushrooms to kick in, a little bit nervous about them working before getting away from parents, but all is good.

1:25- my two friends and I pile into a small motor boat and head to the cliff where we intended to dive off of. I might add at this point that only one of my other friends had taken mushrooms, so we had a spotter. That was a VERY GOOD idea.

1:35- we get to the cliff, I'm in a nervous mood, impatiently waiting for the shrooms to work, but I'm willing them on, I'm trying to force them to work concentrating all of my efforts into feeling high. I smoked a few joints with my friends; this was probably a bad idea because at that point in my life pot would make me paranoid and nervous usually.

1:40- BAM! The shrooms kick in like a ton of bricks... Never have I come up on any drug faster and more powerfully than this. I initially enjoyed the feeling.

1:50- This was the best part of the trip, if my trip had stayed like this I would have had the most intense and fun trip of my life. I had immense open eye visuals. I looked at the ocean before me and it all froze, nothing moved... Like I had taken a photo of the scene in front of me... Then like the picture had been cut into a chess board, square by square pieces of the picture flew towards me. I moved my hand in front of me, the trail didn't fade for about ten seconds. I looked at the spotter and told him I was having a great time. He smiled at me and said, 'your eyes are huge'. That's when things began to go bad.

1:55- I realised that I was in a very intoxicated state, I could hardly move, my body felt heavy and syrupy, I panicked... If I ever begin to feel sick or bad during a trippanicking is the worst thing I can do. I managed to move to a different spot on the cliff, it was very high up.

2:10- My visuals were far too intense and begun to get very scary. I told my friends I was having a bad time, they didn't do much to comfort me, they said, 'you're just coming up man, chill out' I told them I was sick, and that I didn't want to be... Well it's not like I had a choice, I should've accepted the fact I felt mellow and that there was nothing I could do. Instead I started getting all angry at myself, how could I feel sick, why did I take mushrooms, what am I doing, what's happening.

2:30- Nausea strong, panicking, my brain has let every fear I've ever had control me. It's always a good idea to have a plan of things to think about when you are on shrooms, spirituality, love, friendship, future, anything is better than nothing. With nothing to think about, the shrooms will give me something to think about, and sometimes, will make it seem real.

2:45- I must have an underlying fear of drowning, because my trip seemed to focus on that, I had hallucinations that walls of water, over a hundred feet high were crashing over me. I had hallucinations of myself drowning in vomit, I continuously asked my friends, 'Am I throwing up?' I wasn't, but it felt like it.

3:40- My friends were concerned, they said, 'Don't worry man, you've gotta be through the worst of it, it's almost done now.' They were right, it was almost done, but my situation changed, and it was very frightning because I didn't want to move. I felt like everything hated me, everybody hated me, I felt like the entire world was evil, I was convinced I was a lizard, my vision flipped upside down, all of these things and more that I can't remember happened in the next twenty minutes.

4:00- We piled into my friend's motor boat with his sister and his friend... (I'd had a crush on his older sister since I was about 7yrs old and didn't want her to see me in this state)... Well everybody but me was having a great time, I felt like I was at the point of being drunk right before you throw up. I had the spins, noises were loud and blaring, everything had an ominous tone, I felt very sick.

4:10- my friends went waterskiing while I cried and pawed at my face.
4:30- finally I took some very deep breaths and my vision breathed with me. However, it felt really good, like I was in control of the entire world. I started to get my head around the idea that I'd taken magic mushrooms and that they were affecting my perception of everything, I spent about 10 minutes getting my head around that idea and in a slight stupor. However, every breath brought me closer to the end of the paranoia, confusion, fear and hatred that the last two hours had held .

4:50- I had a difficult time coming to terms with what had happened. I met up with my friend's parents, talked to them, they gave me and my other friend a ride downtown. I managed to get a grip of myself and act somewhat normal, I just looked and seemed very tired and downcast.

5:00- As me and my other friend hopped out of the car and thanked them for the ride I had trouble not breaking out with laughter, my trip had turned right around into a very good feeling. The visuals were gone, my head was fairly clear. I just had the most intense body high that felt wonderful and lasted for about three hours... And that was the end of the trip...

I learnt a lot from that trip; I learned about my fears. I learned about mushrooms, I learned about myself. I wasn't scarred by that trip, I didn't let it damage me, though for a few weeks everything seemed surreal. Now about a year and a half later I've done mushrooms almost twenty more times and each time has been better than the last. I can look back at that time of my life and put the depression behind me. In a way that trip was the paramount of my depressive period of my life. It was the worst day of my life, but since that day everything was uphill. Almost like I had a certain amount of anger, fear, hatred etc. to get rid of and by having a bad trip I got rid of it all in hours.

Exp Year: 2000	ExpID: 10855
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 14
Published: Oct 22, 2019	Views: 747
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Mushrooms (39) : Public Space (Museum, Park, etc) (53), Depression (15), Nature / Outdoors (23), Bad Trips (6), Combinations (3), General (1)