Citation: Anatoli Smorin. "Remembering How True Positivity Feels: An Experience with 6-APB, Cannabis & Alcohol (exp112051)". Erowid.org. Jul 17, 2018. erowid.org/exp/112051
This report is part of a seven-report collection. The collection consists of a summary report that is retrospective and generalized in nature as well as six [of which this is one] more detailed chronicles of my experience with 6-APB. If desired, please see the summary report
, where one can find links to each of the other experience reports.
All dosages were prepared on a freshly calibrated milligram (.000 g) scale. The chemical was sourced through a highly vetted chemist and this batch was tested at a > 98% purity. An NMR analysis was completed and analyzed by a third party chemist to verify the chemical was indeed 6-APB. All dosages were from the same batch of chemical. The substance was a medium-light tan color and a very fine powder.
A little background: I consider myself to be well versed in the realm of substance use. Previous experiences include opiates, stimulants and psychedelics. A fair amount of my substance usage history includes novel research chemicals often in less than common combinations.
This report was written using extensive notes as well as audio recordings taken during the experience.
Take 6: Remembering How True Positivity Feels
It has been twenty days since my last usage of any stimulant. I have set up my schedule to allow myself a full day of recovery tomorrow, setting the stage for some experimentation with higher dosages of 6-APB. I have experienced some urges to re-dose and reach higher levels of effects during previous experiences with this substance. Tonight is the night I will indulge those urges. I am feeling confident and excited to be branching away from the slightly cautious dosing strategies I have been adhering to as of late. I have eaten a normal breakfast [eggs, bacon and greens] and a light lunch [various sliced fruits]. I have also been consciously hydrating with water more than average. I am alone for this experience beyond the companionship of my dog Gee.
T + 00:00 [4:30 PM]
I weigh out 139 mg on the trusty and freshly calibrated .000 gram scale. Knowing full well how unpleasant the insufflation will be, I crush up the already finely textured powder under a library card as much as possible. I cut the powder into a skinny line and am surprised at how long it is. Staring down the barrel of the gun, I put the straw to one end of the line, take deep breath, and power through the entirety of the dosage. Even with the larger amount of powder, I feel that there is minimal nasal passage clogging occurring. The familiar and immediate sting rings through my right nostril and I shimmy and shake to try and rid myself of the sensation. Looking to get things moving quickly, I insufflate a small amount of water.
T + 00:04 [4:34 PM]
The burning caused by the drip is nasty, but I’m already feeling some slight rushes of euphoric energy in my forearms. I’m not surprised, I typically depart true baseline quickly on this substance and this is the largest single [at one time] dosage to date.
T + 00:11 [4:41 PM]
Pain is much more manageable than expected. My eyes are wide, darting around the room, and I catch myself rocking back and forth a bit. I tell myself to take a deep breath and slow down. The breathing feels good; just simple in and out breathing feels phenomenal. I check my hands, and to my surprise they are steady. I would have sworn they, along with the rest of my body, was physically vibrating. I feel flushed, like I had just walked into a warm house after spending time outside in cold winter weather.
T + 00:25 [4:55 PM]
The effects that initially rushed me following insufflation have retreated slightly. I am settling nicely into a very good mood, in a body that couldn’t feel much better. Soreness and tension is melting away from my muscles.
T + 00:31 [5:01 PM]
Keeping in line with my goals of exploring some outer reaches of the substance, I prepare and vaporize 99 mg of sativa dominant cannabis. This provides a trampoline effect that really hits my visual field. My old friend “the static” is just becoming visible on the walls, ceilings and other wide and flat spaces. This is an opaque black and white vibrating texture that overlays surfaces. It resembles the constantly morphing static from a television and is an effect I experience often when high on variety of substances including stimulants, psychedelics and even high dosages of cannabis. All the colors in the room have saturated noticeably as well.
T + 00:58 [5:28 PM]
I haven’t been moving around much, mostly taking notes for the report and arranging electronics in order to be able to play music through the better set of speakers in the house. I make my way to the kitchen to retrieve a glass of ice water. During the process I find my motor skills unaffected. I am bobbing and weaving, moving with goofy low intensity dance moves rather than walking to and fro.
I have some previous experience with re-dosing 6-APB and generally I find myself underdoing the supporting dosages [either waiting too long or backing down from larger secondary dosages]. I feel no need to be cautious now; this is after all, the night to swim in the deep end.
I begin to weigh out the booster dose. A few large clumps of powder accidentally transfer from the storage vessel to the scale’s tray. The digits read 212 mg. I think about it…and decide to back things down. Even in my synthetically optimistic state I am wary of jumping in too deep, too quickly. 65 mg seems more appropriate as a booster. I reserve the “moon shot” re-dosage for later on.
T + 01:04 [5:34 PM]
The insufflation of the 65 mg is administered through the same nostril as the original dose. Water follows the powder, but extreme pain and discomfort do not. I am high enough that the nasal sting and burning drip are barely noticeable. This makes taking more infinitely more appealing.
T + 01:18 [5:48 PM]
It is hard to discern whether the first dosage is still ramping up, the booster is starting to take hold, or some of both. If I were a betting man, I’d guess both.
T + 01:33 [6:03 PM]
I have some slight shaking in my fingertips and I feel physically warm. My mood is swelling rapidly; the smile on my face grows larger and more constant with every passing second. I am enjoying this come-up so much that I can’t decide what to do. I debate a music and dance session, calling friends on the telephone, meditation, or a number of other activities. I end up sitting on the floor poised for meditation, but never committing to the practice. My happiness and energy continue to gain speed making it too difficult to settle my thoughts.
T + 01:45 [6:15 PM]
I am sweating lightly and decide to get some ice water from the kitchen. On my trip to the refrigerator I slide my feet along the wood floors without really thinking about it. I feel childish and fresh, loving all things fun. I toss back a glass of water in a few gulps and open a light beer [4.2% ABV]. The taste combined with the cold temperature is divine.
T + 02:01 [6:31 PM]
The intensity of the effects is starting to plateau. Often this point in an experience brings me some relief, as I know I have not overwhelmed myself. Tonight however, I feel a twinge of sadness. The sensation of growing intensity has been fun, new and exploratory. I remember I have more powder and a scale and having given myself the evening to indulge, decide to do so.
T + 02:12 [6:42 PM]
I am looking at a weighed and crushed line of 54 mg of 6-APB. I have put some thought into my timeline and dosage and decide this is a safe but properly aggressive dosage to take things up a notch. I make a mental note to not re-dose again for at least a few hours, as this will put me towards the outer limits of my personal experience with the substance and in a shorter time frame than previous trials.
The insufflation is nearly pain free and a slight chemical drip is detected along with a mild numbing / irritation towards the back of my throat. I follow the powder with some insufflated water [this time I have elected to use the “fresh” nostril].
T + 02:38 [7:08 PM]
I am lying on the floor of my living room. Complete and utter bliss envelop me. I have selected some low tempo electronic music as a backdrop. My mind melds with the music as it flows out of the speakers. Each note and tone seems to be processed individually, as if my brain is processing at a faster speed than normally and can assign meaning to each snippet of the track. On a macro level, I feel connections to the music, synching emotions to the instrumental compositions.
With my eyes closed for the majority of this listening session, I am treated to series of visions that begin as a simple circular spinning form: a shoddily drawn mandala of sorts. The designs begin to gain intricacy and vibrancy every few rotations. The end state is a spinning psychedelic wheel of rainbow colors that stretches into a third dimension, allowing the vaguely Aztec designs to exponentially increase their intricacy.
There is an interesting balance of sedation and rolling sensations. These seemingly opposite effects are pairing nicely. The experience and substance has a natural and comfortable air to it. I don’t feel synthetically overrun by any means. My resting heart rate measures at 94 BPM, which is increased from my sober 55-60 BPM.
I have no classic “shaking” nystagmus, but my eyes seem to roll back as I flop my head front to back and side-to-side, alternating between open and closed eyes. I am sure I would appear heavily intoxicated to a third party at this point in time.
T + 03:06 [7:36 PM]
I have been in a zone of complete pleasure for the past half hour. Taking notes is difficult at this point in the experience. I begin to write and immediately tangent into extremely positive thought patterns.
Taking notes is difficult at this point in the experience. I begin to write and immediately tangent into extremely positive thought patterns.
I describe how wonderful the positive aspects of my life are and how the negative aspects will eventually become opportunities for growth and learning. I find that I cannot write as fast as my thoughts and this frustrates me. Knowing a sound recorder is present and active, I decide to talk to myself to capture beta on my condition and experience rather than attempt to write in an articulate and legible manner.
T + 03:19 [7:49 PM]
I am at a solid +++, a heavy roll without a doubt. While visuals are still active with my eyes closed, I don’t feel particularly “trippy”, much less so than previous experiments with MDA. My headspace and thoughts are operating in a ‘normal’ manner, without any thought loops or other unusual functionality. An overwhelming sense of positivity is the most noticeable mental effect. On the physical side of things: I have settled and do not feel an excessive need to move around. My tactile sensations are extremely sensitive. When a light breeze comes through the window, I am immediately aware of it and seem to be able to feel the air curve around every inch of my exposed skin and even flow underneath my clothes. I consider an extra layer of clothing as the contrast in temperature on my skin’s surface warns me I am getting cold much faster than when sober [potentially some vasoconstriction in play at this point].
T + 03:31 [8:01 PM]
I prepare and vaporize 131 mg of sativa dominant cannabis. I also open another light beer [4.2% ABV]. I notice I am smoking at a rapid pace and the beer can surprises me when I lift it to a sip and find it empty.
I feel level-headed enough now to contemplate my evening. I am still ripping along in a wonderful stimulated condition. I knew coming into the evening that my plan was to test the upper limits of this substance, and that I would battle my natural instinct to cautiously re-dose. I would have been plenty content riding this plateau to its completion and transitioning to a come-down. There is no fiendish desire to take more at this point, although I do wonder if this is because I am not yet coming down.
Knowing that trailing doses often fail to raise intensity [and only extend my experience], I decide to weight out another dosage and prepare for another level.
T + 03:59 [8:29 PM]
Uncharted waters have me slightly nervous. I have fulfilled my desire to wait several hours since the last dosage, and I have not experienced worrying effects such as rapidly increased heart rate or nausea. “For science” – I tell myself, and settle on a dosage of 142 mg. I plan for this to be my last ingestion of 6-APB for the evening and elected a dosage slightly higher than my original dosage [now roughly four hours ago] in hopes of not extending the experience but really testing the higher intensity effects this substance has to offer.
I split the dosage into four lines and psych myself up before putting the straw to the first line.
T + 04:08 [8:38 PM]
I have made my way through the entire dosage, using a mix of both nostrils. As per usual, water insufflation follows. I know things are about to escalate in a major way, and decide to take Gee outside to use the bathroom and also allow myself some cool fresh air as this come-up begins.
T + 04:12 [8:42 PM]
The hair on my arms is uncomfortably sensitive to the cooler air and slight breeze. Gee and I only make it a few hundred feet from the door before I begin to feel a little confused. I know why I came outside [let the dog use the bathroom], but I seem to have momentarily forgotten. I notice I am slightly uncoordinated, my strides faster than normal and not delicate by any stretch of the imagination. I briefly internally debate if I should sit outside and allow this latest dosage to settle, but I decide the mental comfort / safe space of the house is more appealing.
T + 04:40 [9:10 PM]
I am inside again, sitting on the couch with not one, but two large glasses of water in front of me. I feel like I have a bit of a fever, my breath is a little shallow, and I am concerned I have slightly overdone it. The glowing positivity has been challenged by my logical thought process that is now telling me that I have perhaps surpassed the enjoyable level of 6-APB
The glowing positivity has been challenged by my logical thought process that is now telling me that I have perhaps surpassed the enjoyable level of 6-APB
, given my lack of tolerance.
I am sitting on my couch, staring at whatever is in front of me [some art and a window] although I am not really registering or caring about my field of sight. I attempt some deep breaths, but the calming effect of them seems to be drowned out by the fact that I feel myself becoming higher and higher. Some nausea has presented itself, but it seems to stem from my psychological worry, rather than the chemical itself.
My vision is hard to shift around. When I move my point of focus everything gets blurry for a second until things can refocus. There is a physical sensation that accompanies the out of focus vision. My eyes feel like I am trying to bulge them out and instead of smooth liquid movement, they seem to shift in jagged adjustments. Looking from my right peripheral to the left I can count five or six of these distinct points where my physical eyes seem to pause briefly before continuing to their final destination [where my focus regains itself].
I am thinking about taking a small dose of etizolam with the goal of dialing things back a little. Amidst my concern and worry I manage to rationalize that this could be an unpleasant come-up, and at the end of this ramp lies a beautiful experience. I decide to allow a bit more time to pass before reaching for a benzodiazepine parachute.
T + 05:06 [9:36 PM]
I feel as though I have passed through some sort of threshold. My concern about my safety is dropping away. My resting heart rate is 131 BPM, which is nearly double a sober measurement, but still well below an alarming rate. I have managed to drink several glasses of water since my last insufflation. While I do not know if I have reached a peak, I feel more at ease, which is a massive shift in my mental dynamic.
Suddenly I am realizing that I have separated from the ‘real world’. I feel a physical vibration centering in my core and it slowly radiates throughout my body. My eyes are wide, and pupils are extremely dilated. The racing energy of the “roll” has subsided to a starkly contrasting stillness. I have not moved from my seat on the couch and I feel a blankness enter my mind, replacing the worries and concerns that have been dominating my thoughts.
I finally feel calm enough to shift my gaze around the room and even stand up to explore some different rooms within the house. There is a definite psychedelic headspace present now. I feel more comfortable with lights on, and quickly flick light switches the instance I enter a new space in the house. I feel like I am seeing the rooms for the first time, scanning each visually and sonically with great intent, although I am not sure what I am looking for.
T + 05:32 [10:02 PM]
I make my way back into the kitchen and living room [open layout] and realize I have been meandering through the house, potentially to kill time and see when this latest dosage might settle. IT HAS. I lean on the kitchen counter and realize that I have not felt this way in a very long time. My body feels like nothing. My aches and pains are gone. A rhythmic swelling of pleasure throbs through every cell in my body. My thoughts are concise but not simplistic. I feel like I am on top of the world, my own world. This is a roll of a different color.
I feel the yearning for human companionship and conversation, but I am not tempted to reach out via phone or computer to friends the way I typically am on other stimulants such as MDMA or 4-FA. Something in my subconscious seems to be overriding these desires and instructing me that tonight, is for me alone. There is a depth to this that I do not often reach on other stimulants. The experience feels more natural and authentic than some other purely ‘stimmy – rolling – FUCK YEAH BUD’ materials.
T + 05:49 [10:19 PM]
I still have little interest in hand-writing notes. I am further than that. I bring a beer to the couch with me, but don’t open it.
Once seated, I am having a lot of reminiscing thoughts about friends, family, and the beauty of life. I struggle to remember how or why I get so anxious and worked up over everyday life situations. Why can I simply not remember how I feel now and realize that nothing is worth stressing over? I write in my notebook: “Remember how true positivity feels – there is literally no reason to stress; stressors will become small and forgotten in time”.
T + 06:16 [10:46 PM]
Wham. I am hit by a wave of energy. In seconds, I select upbeat electronic music and turn up the volume. The deep thoughts drop from my mind and I slip into a classic euphoric stimulant roll. I dance, dance & dance some more. Movements are fast paced and I am semi-aware of my aesthetic, attempting to make my movements look good, but then slipping out of my first person mind and synching into the music. I find no extra mental or emotional attachment to the sounds from the speakers, but I am enjoying the music to an extreme degree.
T + 06:49 [11:19 PM]
I am sweating heavily now. I drink a large glass of water as I take off my shirt, feeling very overheated. I lay on the floor, as this is cooler than the couch. My view of the ceiling is far from sober. The wooden ceiling is breathing; a contracting and retraction where dimensions do not seem to change, but at the same time the ceiling seems to occupy more and less space. I redirect my focus to other items in the room. The air is buzzing with the visual static that was previously limited to walls and other surfaces. The air is now populated by the vibrating dots, allowing me to see the air itself. This is only visible when I sit still for a minute or so. As I walk around, the dots seem to disappear and I do not have any sensation of moving through them. Different patterns seem to highlight and then de-highlight themselves while also slowly shrinking and expanding. I’d describe this as subtle, smooth drifting visual.
I think to myself; wow, I am in a truly psychedelic state now. The continuing stimulation balances nicely with these more visual sensations. I have felt in the past that overdoing stimulants can become unpleasant both physically and mentally. This evening seems to be much more manageable, although toeing the line at times. I find getting this comfort from 6-APB particularly interesting, as MDA in particular has not typically offered me this controllability in higher dosages.
T + 07:15 [11:45 PM]
Sexual thoughts are definitely present at this point. They have been non-existent since my initial come-up, but as the psychedelic effects taper off, they begin to surface. Beyond the desire for this type of interaction, I find myself delving into the topic of sexuality, and the role it plays in a long-term committed relationship. I feel open, free, and more comfortable discussing this topic with Kai [currently chatting via a messenger application] than I normally would be.
T + 07:32 [12:02 AM]
I finally open and drink the beer [4.2 % ABV] that I retrieved from the refrigerator about an hour ago but completely forgot about. I feel like I am coming back down into orbit at this point. I have been struggling to document and even comprehend the strength of the effects for the past several hours. I am feeling drastically more sober suddenly, as I often find is the case with intense experiences once the comedown begins. I am still at a solid +++, but I am, for the first time in hours, able to really grasp the sense of time and think about the near future [the rest of my evening] in a practical manner.
A sense of disconnect between myself and the ‘normal world’ is still very obvious. I’m serene, blissful, and in an unbelievably good mood. Also high, very high . . . but I feel less out of control and far out than the past few hours – I’m now once again living beyond the current moment.
T + 08:04 [12:34 PM]
145 mg of indica dominant sativa is prepared and vaporized. I am aware that the experience is on a downtrend, and I am now mentally capable of logically deciding how I want it to feel. Benzos, alcohol, cannabis and opioids are all available and potentially appealing options. I decide to begin with cannabis and alcohol with the intent of boosting the stimulant effects for a bit longer while also transitioning towards sleep.
T + 08:19 [12:49 PM]
I take a shot of whiskey [40% ABV] and also open another beer [4.2% ABV].
T + 08:41 [1:11 AM +1]
The booze feels nice; it seems to synergize with the sedation, relaxation and positive feelings of the 6-APB rather than the energy and stimulation. I find this ideal for the comedown section of the evening.
My breaths are growing naturally deeper and I find myself slowly rolling my neck and head from side to side. The music has by chance aligned with my mood and the slower pace & gentle tones coming through the speakers are perfection to my ears. I am particularly admiring the raindrops / pitter-patter sound that is the backdrop to this mellow piano etude. It sounds so realistic, so diverse in its sound pallet I am mesmerized. When I see Gee circle and then settle herself into a tighter ball-like position due to her dislike of thunder I realize the rain is real, not a part of the music.
T + 08:53 [1:23 AM + 1]
I turn off the music and close my eyes to absorb the beautifully random, but somehow also patterned raindrops that made different tones as they strike different materials of our roof. Sound is amplified but distant at the same time. Each raindrop’s tone finds its own unique pathway to my ears.
T + 09:09 [1:39 AM + 1]
I can sense the plateau of the experience's intensity drawing to an end. The last alcohol and cannabis ingestion have extended the plateau, but I can feel that the 6-APB is beginning to wear off. I decide to make the comedown not only as smooth as possible but also as enjoyable as possible. I elect to begin with a cocktail of benzodiazepines designed to increase in their intensity as time passes by selecting chemicals with varying onsets and durations: .75 mg of Diclazepam, .25 mg of Flubromazolam and 2 mg of Etizolam all sublingually and in blotter form at the same time.
I quickly have a mouthful of lightly chemically flavored saliva. From previous experience I know the metallic taste is a blend of primarily the diclazepam and flubromazolam. The taste of etizolam is a bit overpowered by the other two.
T + 09:28 [1:58 AM + 1]
I can already feel the relaxation of the benzos sinking into my conscious. I have swallowed several times in the past few minutes and flipped each blotter over using my tongue in hopes of absorbing as much of each blotter’s content as possible.
T + 09:33 [2:03 AM + 1]
I am craving a beer, mostly for the thirst quenching quality and the refreshment that will be brought on by the cold temperature. I swallow all the tabs on the first large swig of beer [4.2% ABV].
I get a large bottle of ice water and a glass of quality scotch crafted in Craigellachie, Moray. This is a treat for me, a bottle I pour from only a few times a year. I don’t note any specific changes in the flavor profile of the drink. It’s delightful, but the iced water is more enjoyable to gulp down.
The stimulant is melting together with the familiar glow of etizolam. I almost feel some of the hypnotic notes from the diclazepam seeping into my mind, slowing thoughts down and cutting the edge off my stimulant high. This surprises me, as generally this substance takes significantly longer to become noticeable.
T + 09:57 [2:27 AM + 1]
I feel wicked good. This might be the best comedown my world has ever seen. The 6-APB is a strong base, keeping my body loose and buzzing with a true natural energy. The alcohol and benzodiazepines are enhancing the sedation and relaxation already present from the 6-APB. My overall mood is cheerful, and I remain able to do some creative problem solving and life planning in my journal in this condition.
T + 10:23 [2:49 AM + 1]
I practice some basic yoga, which quickly turns into more of a meditative breathing exercise. I am not particularly spiritual and I don’t practice mindfulness techniques as much as I would like to, but when I stand up, I have the sensation of possessing a glowing aura around my body while my mind mellows. This is similar to how I feel after a long massage and finally stand up again. I feel a little “out of my own body” and my pace of walking is much slower. Don’t get me wrong, I am no Buddhist monk, I was walking to the kitchen for a shot of whiskey.
T + 10:35 [3:01 AM + 1]
Libation [40% ABV] consumed.
I do not experience the “warming from the inside” sensation that alcohol often provides me. I really don’t feel much immediate effect at all.
T + 10:51 [3:17 AM + 1]
I now feel the alcohol’s effects. It is potentially the ever-progressing mental and physical relaxation from the benzos. I am thinking fewer thoughts per minute than I was even thirty minutes ago. My arms and legs feel as though gravity’s pull on them is gradually increasing.
T + 11:05 [3:31 AM + 1]
I am beginning to feel drowsy and I catch myself nodding out twice, waking up as my chin hit my chest as I sit upright on the couch.
At a sloth’s pace, I stretch out on the couch, nestling my feet under Gee and covering myself with a soft blanket. I realize I have been chilly for a while now, but never really registered that fact until I felt the extreme comfort and warmth the blanket and Gee provide. My mind has simplified to a slowly swirling sea of contentedness.
T + 14:52 [7:18 AM + 1]
I wake up. I don’t recall the exact moment I fell asleep. Gee is rambunctious and asking to go outside and be fed. I very badly want to turn back over and return to a deep sleep. I know Gee will not stand for this and with Kai gone I am the only option; I rally. I’m in a bit of a fog as I find shoes and a jacket to accompany Gee outside.
The crisp air feels stupendous but I feel a little stale physically, like I need a shower. My stream of thoughts is paced normally, but the content is gentle, simple and happy.
T + 15:10 [7:36 AM + 1]
With the dog fed, I lay back down on the couch. I don’t feel truly sleepy anymore; I don’t think I will be able to fall asleep again. This doesn’t bother me much. I don’t think anything could bother me right now. I’m at a solid ++ right now, but 97% of the distance between baseline and myself is a result of the benzodiazepines with perhaps 3% a lingering twinkle of the 6-APB. I review some of the written notes from the experience and do not find any major surprises. I have solid memory recall up until the minutes before falling asleep.
Conclusion / Additional Notes:
Holy Buckets! This was a fun one. A smattering of concern about physical health, potential nausea and some typical stimulant ‘negative / neutral’ side effects [vasoconstriction and mandible grinding] are my only lowlights of the experience. I was extremely pleased to find the substance relatively pliable even in higher dosages. While the deep, raw power of the substance was certainly felt, I never felt like I was at risk of getting run over by the substance as might happen to me on high dosages of other stimulants. The more psychedelic effects [visuals and change in mental functionality] balanced nicely, but seemed to play a background role despite their legitimacy. Music enhancement, extremely improved tactile sensations and a ripper good mood were the forefront effects. The more introspective side of 6-APB played hide and seek with me throughout the night. Much of the come-up was too exciting and overwhelmingly strong to do much critical thinking or planning. Some of the strongest peaks of the experience led my mind into a beautiful void that had therapeutic qualities, but no creative problem solving was occurring here. It was during the comedown that I felt the most creative and introspective.
I would like to comment briefly on the combination of depressants I ingested during this experience. This combination, particularly with the stacked [continuous] dosages of alcohol, has risks. Memory loss [read: blacking out] is certainly a potential effect from this combination that in itself carries the risk of unpredictable actions such as unplanned and unnecessary re-dosing, which in turn could lead to other problematic situations. Falling asleep face down in a soft pillow or vomiting and not waking up, could be fatal in a worst-case scenario. I felt comfortable with these dosages due to past personal experiences combining these particular benzodiazepines with alcohol as well as some tolerance to alcohol at the time of this experience. I also employed my “make re-dosing a process” protocol. This is a precautionary measure I often take where I make sure any re-dosing materials are locked up and out of sight, typically in a different room than the one I am in.
I make sure any re-dosing materials are locked up and out of sight, typically in a different room than the one I am in.
This is by no means a guarantee of safety but it is designed to make me think [even in an inebriated state] about the act of re-dosing and the potential consequences, since retrieving the substance[s] is notably more involved than if it were sitting out in front of me.
The day following the experience [after the last timestamp] was spent in a gradually dwindling glow from the long half-life of the Diclazepam and Flubromazolam. I did not have immediate appetite upon waking up, but I did have a normal desire for lunch around noon. The day was spent tidying up the house and enjoying my own company with some soft background music. I did feel slightly lazy and solo retrospective time was much more appealing than making any social plans. I did not notice any bounce-back anxiety or sadness from the extreme pleasure of the 6-APB nor the heavy relaxation from the benzo dosages that day nor on the few days following the experience. I did not take away any life-changing realizations from the experience, but there was a sense of magic to the mental space I accessed during the peak of the 6-APB’s effects.
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