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Wouldn't Wish This On My Worst Enemy
Mushrooms
by Will
Citation:   Will. "Wouldn't Wish This On My Worst Enemy: An Experience with Mushrooms (exp113195)". Erowid.org. May 30, 2019. erowid.org/exp/113195

 
DOSE:
2.5 - 3.0 g oral Mushrooms (dried)
BODY WEIGHT: 160 lb
This is my first ever trip report and I’m not much of a writer, so bear with me on this one. :) I would say I’m a moderately experienced psychonaut. I’ve probably tripped about 25-30 times, but usually I don’t take huge doses because I never really have the time or energy, however when I graduate college I would like to try the Terence McKenna method with mushrooms or even do DMT.

This trip was one of my first trips and the first one that really opened my eyes (and third eye) to what psychedelics really have to offer. I bought just under 3 grams from my friend. I had just finished my classes on a Friday afternoon and my friend T and I decided we should go ahead and take them in my dorm room. (What a great place to lose one's sanity!) I took the three grams and he took some LSD.

I knew something wasn’t right almost immediately because I started feeling different within ten minutes, whereas my previous trips would take about 40 minutes. I decided I would lay on my bed to get myself more comfortable and T and I distracted each other by talking about pledgeship and other random shit. After about ten minutes of talking, I suddenly cut T off mid sentence with “Okayyyy I think this trip is headed south.” He reassured me that I would be okay and that it’s just a drug, which made me feel better. This didn’t last long because out of nowhere I got hit with something that I had never heard of out of the all the trip reports I’ve ever seen (which was a lot even then). ALIEN HAND SYNDROME. Yes you heard me right. My right hand started twitching and moving around without my control.
My right hand started twitching and moving around without my control.
But this only got worse, this shaking travelled up my arm and into my body. At this point I was having a full blown seizure.

After about 30 seconds the seizure stopped in my body and exited out my left arm and hand. I was very relieved when this over, being glad that I wasn’t seizing anymore. Ohh.... I was wrong. Very very wrong. This didn’t happen just once, oh no. This happened roughly 25 times throughout the trip, each time starting in my right hand, going through my body, and exiting from my left. At first, every time I would stop seizing the room would look completely different than before as if I was in a different place. Then after the first 5 seizures the room would change every time I would blink. One blink to the next I would travel to different dimensions, each with an evil carnival/alien vibe. My concept of time was just gone at this point. I was even trying to guess the lengths of intervals of time. I’d wait what I thought was 5 minutes and T would say it was 50 minutes, and vice versa.

I got out of my bed and sat on the ground hoping even a small change in location would help. Nope! As soon as I got on the floor I went into what I surmise to be psychosis. Time went to a stand still and I was convinced that the only way to end the trip was to die. I started begging T to somehow find a gun or a knife so I could kill myself. Of course he was terrified and tried his best to calm me down. But for some reason that just agitated me even more. I started screaming very loud (thank god no one in the dorm heard me) and I even got up and tried to jump out of the window, which would have quite possibly done the job as we were four stories high. T had to hold me down and I stayed put, but my psychosis got worse. I would sit up really fast and laugh my ass off like a maniac then lay down really fast and cry buckets. I did this over... and over.. and over with the seizures still continuing. Fortunately I snapped out of it eventually and could tell the peak was starting to subside slowly, but I wasn’t out of the woods yet.

At this point I was able to remember who I was and basic aspects of myself. I looked in the mirror and felt like I was seeing myself for the first time. This was the first of few blissful parts of the trip. I saw my true self, or what I believe to be how other people see me and I just said “I’m okay with this.” For once I was proud to be myself and to this day my self confidence has drastically improved. T realized how recognizing myself made my trip better, so he started quizzing me on basic things about myself, my friends, etc. Every time I would answer a question correctly, I would be hit with a huge wave of euphoria, but when I would get something wrong, I would freak out and either start saying a word over and over on repeat or just start seizing again. We did this until I came down enough to compose myself. For the rest of the trip I pretty much just chilled and didn’t try to strain my brain too much. I’m honestly glad I had this experience and I learned a lot about myself, though I still cannot explain the seizures and would not wish the experience on my worst enemy.

I love sharing this story, not only because it was the most life changing/extreme event in my life, but because I like stressing the safety of drug use and I believe psychedelic safely is very undermined.

Exp Year: 2017ExpID: 113195
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: May 30, 2019Views: 1,234
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Mushrooms (39) : Difficult Experiences (5), First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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