DOSE:	5 g	oral	Mushrooms	(dried)
	0.5 joints/cigs	smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

80 kg

First Trip, Heroic Dose Shrooms

Been waiting a long time to get my hands on some. Finally got em, got home @ 21:20, almost time to bed, as I've been working the whole day. Fasted for 7 hours. Alone, in darkness at first.

Ate the whole 5g dried simple without anything. Then drank water. And waited, and waited, while smoking some. Put on some shamanic music and arranged the bed so I'm comfortable, with water nearby.

~30-40 minutes in, closing my eyes I was seeing casino-like symbols and colors, and shit like $$WINNER$$. Cannot stand on my foot anymore, as walls are coming in, and head unstable.

~50 minutes in, yawning, clenched jaw, some fuzzy warm in my chest. Closed my eyes, and saw near the window a green fat entity that was made of green pixels, inviting me to go with "them". Refused, and tried calling my friend, to ask if this could be auto-suggestion. He didn't pick up. I started staring at the phone and the minutes wouldn't pass, and he wasn't calling back.
Went back, another entity, less fat than the previous, was calling me to go with them. Again I opened my eyes and turned on the light.

Then hell began. Felt like being stuck in a loop for tens of hours, awaking in different sides of the bed. Went peeing, left the water in the bathroom, and could not remember where my water was. I was thirstier than ever. Breathing became difficult, as I felt gasping for air sometimes. Breaths felt like they lasted minutes.

Wanted to escape the loop, to get out. But there was no one to help. Friend finally called, and stayed with me for an hour and a half he said. To me it felt like I spent tens of hours with him. I remember begging him to come help me, and get me out, but I couldn't give him the address. It wasn't possible to locate myself at all, but oh I was trying soo much.

I kept asking him if he knows how I feel, and if he sees and hears the stuff I hear. ( Couldn't describe what, but kept asking him anyway). I felt that he was with me there, and suddenly when I truly felt that he understands me, I saw ourselves combining into one being, that spiraled forever until it became a single cloud, that slowly vaporized into nothingness. Then I felt more relaxed, and I realized he wasn't even on the phone anymore.

4 hours have passed...

Saw my TV Timer going "280 seconds left before shutting down due to no activity". That was my sign: I suddenly started giving myself commands: Put the cigarette away, go get the water, arrange the bed, prepare for sleep. I ordered everything, and when the countdown was ~9 seconds left, I started slowly falling on the bed, and slept for 2 hours, after which I went to work.

Jesus christ!

Overall I think this was a 60-80% hellish experience, and I don't think I'll do it alone again.

I drew something on a paper, some waves, and "time, reality". That's all I can decipher anyways. I did have questions written down, ready to ask myself on the other side, or something, but didn't have the chance.

I think next time I won't pair it with smoke, as that may have numbed me too much. And I went in thinking I was somewhat prepared. I was NOT. I don't think one ever is prepared for something like this, even after some experience.

Next up: 15g Atlantis truffles.

Exp Year: 2019	ExpID: 113338
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 26
Published: Dec 11, 2019	Views: 714
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Mushrooms (39) : Alone (16), Entities / Beings (37), Difficult Experiences (5), Combinations (3)