DOSE:	repeated	smoked	Cannabis
	2 - 3 g	oral	Mushrooms	(tea)

BODY WEIGHT:

41 kg

(sorry for my bad english)

My day was just fine, I got alot of work done in the office. Good overall feeling, the sun was shining though it was really cold (21st December), Christmas just a few days ahead. Going to a friend, cause we planned to trip on shrooms some time ago.

The setting couldnt be better - we listen to goa with another guy and a girl. Almost constantly smoking joints. The room isnt too big, very comfortable. Colorful lights around the turntables - Christmas tree wire. I'll call the main dj Shiva, the girl Kali and the other friend Raiden (cause he looked like this god later). Experienced shroomers, except me.

I came up with the idea to make shroom-tea, 2 grams for everyone. So thats 8-9 grams dried shrooms in a little bowl. We cut the shrooms into small pieces and cooked it for 15 minutes, then mixing it with herbal tea. We didnt cook separately... Tasted nice. Goes down like a fine tea. Shiva and Kali enjoyed it with honey. The bottom of my cup was tasting really shroomy.

About 20 minutes later everything seemed fine. It was just the next minute that came at a pulsing shocking speed. I tripped about 8 times before but this time it was COMPLETELY different. My body felt good but my brain was glowing with a fluorescing light. I closed my eyes - nothing special. I opened them again - my friends were not sitting in the order they sat before. Ok...

I realized that the room was VERY small right now. Everything was in the wrong place. It morphed and shifted into a big room, a long room and a deep room. Looking at my friends. Oh my God! Whats going on? Shiva had 6 eyes, sometimes a completely deformed head small and big. Insectoid spidery body. It looked scary. Raiden was different, he looked like an old god with long white hair and a long slightly bigger face. Kali was alright - she looked naturally and good. There was nothing morphed or deformed. So every person looked different.

I couldnt believe it, I was dreaming, it felt like a dream and it was impossible real. Too much distortion. I got angry cause my friends were not tripping THAT hard. They were still talking and doing things on the computer. It was clear - THIS was a real trip, I did shrooms before, but not really. Thats what everyone was talking about when going on shrooms. But how did my friends manage to do things relaxed? I will never do shrooms again, thats too hard. My trips before were a joke. THIS was the real thing.

My time for fleeing - I wasnt prepared for that. I tryed to get away. NOW or never I said to myself. Every second was counting. I told my friends that I planned to leave. I wanted to lay down on my bed alone in darkness. Pretending I have to work tomorrow and wanting to go sleep. So everyone got really angry on me. I couldnt help myself. I didnt want or better wasnt able to describe what I saw. So scary. The room rotated and morphed along. I wasnt able to find the exit. So my friends didnt know exactly whats going on with me. Raiden asked me if I was able to surf it. No way....no control. I layed down. I knew it would change my life. Everyone was angry, me too. They will go tell everyone. Ruin my life totally. So I lost my 3 friends. And my life. Irrepairable. I resisted. They insisted.

While lying down I had NO closed eye visuals - for a long time. My brain turned liquid in a matter of seconds. The juice was pumped down into my veins. No brain in my head. Only blood. My head was full of thick dark red blood. I didnt have any energy rushes or electricity. But it was really painful...believe me.

Lost perception of time. Was it a minute or an hour? I couldnt tell. Time stretched enormous. A minute REALLY took an hour. Unbelievable. Opening my eyes was scary, the room wasnt a room anymore. The was no space. No air. The walls and just everything was right in front of my eyes. Nothing in between. Pulsing warping. Beyond plastic. Everything flat before is warping into a full body, textures went 3d-fractal.

Strong Synesthesia - Feeling impossible words, seeing my feelings and thoughts, touching my vision and feelings.

Breathing was very hard. I catched a cold little more than one week before and still had slight problems. Shiva and Raiden gave me instructions cause I forgot to breathe at all some times. I concentrated on 3 things: breathing, checking pulse, staying awake.

My mind rotated into a spiral like tunnel. Enjoyed that. Insanity - I was flopping between worlds and different mindstates never felt before. Totally freaking out. There was no going back - ever. I was sure I would have countless disabilities after this trip. I may never get back to reality. Stuck in an ever changing deforming body with complete insanity. No more control. Connected to all worlds and dimensions of all time with one fucked up body. I wouldnt cry, never. I was prepared for death. Maybe living in a nerve clinic.

Life was just a space trap. We have to move on to the next consciousness. Life has lasted only 1 second before, I am right now warping into the next dimension. Looking quickly, opening my eyes. Hyperspace jumping. Very interesting feeling.

There was no body any longer and no world surrounding me. My thoughts were a huge crystal - it shattered. I was a infinite wave of small crystals. No feelings or thoughts.

My heart beats slowly. Seeing one frame per heartbeat. Reading my life in a book carefully. Fluck-----fluck-----fluck-----fluck...endless.

Shiva said...I am poisoned really strong. Indicating they would let me die. I am not going to tell them I was dying. Unsure of anything. They shut off the music. Opened the window. Looked at me. It was cold. White. Like in the morning, I didnt know the time. I think I was looking really weird. Ashamed. Shiva gave me a glass of water. Nice. They wouldnt let me die.

I layed down again. Powerful energy rushing through my body. After 30 minutes (2 hours under my perception) a sudden hit. Back to reality. Feeling enourmosly good, after this disastrous ride! Man...I was SO happy. Unbelievable. My own thoughts again. I was living. Everything before was an illusion. Smiling endlessly. Still unable to talk. I was able to deform everything with my thoughts. The room was full with colorful stripes, still not much space.

Whats next? Whats next? Whats Next!? Whats next? Whats next? Ok I am going to...Whats next? SO happy...whats next? What should I do next? I am reborn...so what should I do now? Whats next? It looped for about 30 minutes. What if...

Seemed really long. Raiden left. I was almost unable to talk to him or say goodbye.

Shiva referred to a buddha state. Kali, Shiva and me sat there listening to music and smoking a joint. Very cool. I was relaxed and feeling immortal strength.

I remembered Kali saying in the past: When u accept the permanent state of something bad and it turns out to get even better than before, its overwhelming. True.

I didnt stay much longer. Driving home in a taxi. Clear thoughts. Wise and powerful. Able to change my surrounding world in a blink.

Back at home. 5:15 in the morning! Thought it was 11 or 12. Time for music and a joint. I was dancing like 2 hours! Celebrating EVERYTHING. Life looked and felt shiny. Though some alien thoughts were still there...

Bathing was almost too relaxing. So I went to sleep soon.

Just a memory next day. I've survived. Lucky me.

It sounded scary but I enjoyed about 65 percent of this trip. I like my horror thoughts. I know how it feels now, no one can - who wasnt there. I saw alot. Touched everything.

Exp Year: 2001	ExpID: 11435
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Oct 21, 2019	Views: 1,084
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Mushrooms - P. mexicana (193) : Combinations (3), Difficult Experiences (5), Small Group (2-9) (17)