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Did I Die...?
Mushrooms - P. subaeruginosa & Cannabis
Citation:   Lucifer666. "Did I Die...?: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. subaeruginosa & Cannabis (exp116398)". Erowid.org. Nov 23, 2022. erowid.org/exp/116398

T+ 0:00
1.5 g oral Mushrooms - P. subaeruginosa (dried)
  T+ 0:10   smoked Cannabis  
What happens when your not sure if you died or not??
Did I change timelines?
(This is way longer than I anticipated)

Ok so hereís my story. 35 years old. Smoked weed forever lol. Only had acid once in my twenties, good experience. After a long break up, suffered depression for a long while. But In the last year or so recently shifted my mind to a better place.

After much research on the mind, meditation, spirituality and a bit about magic mushrooms I thought I would trial microdosing. After finding some in the wild (subaeruginosa) I picked and dried them. I Decided I wanted a real trip before microdosing. I thought 1gram would be enough for a newbie like me.

So I took the mushrooms slightly crushed up and downed with my coffee was not something I was used to. Had my sister as a trip sitter for the first few hours and all went well the first time. The first trip was very mild, with very mild o.e.v. But I must admit it was a enjoyed mystical experience. And I had a great chat with my subconscious witch ended with myself and my daughter snuggled on the couch in my blanket watching movies and laughing all night.

Fast forward one week later (the second trip). Was home alone been thinking about the mystical experience and decided to take another trip. Had picked more mushies during the week. The last time I noticed, I was in full control, kind of drunk like, but had full control. So decided I would be ok with no trip sitter and journey alone. I also wanted just a bit more of visuals etc. So my dose was 1.5g this time. I wasnít nervous this time and decided I was in control. Well I was wrong, very wrong. I took them about 7pm crushed to a fine powder this time, so it was easier to get down. I decided to have a shower as I came up. I noticed brightness of colours as exiting the shower thinking wow that was quick to kick in. Well I checked the time after my shower and only 10minutes had passed. Still felling ok, slight visuals kicking in, I had a smoke and decided to sit on the couch and enjoy my music.

Ok so hereís where things spiral out of control. The music was all wrong and I decided I had to keep focus and try to find the right songs for a good trip. Typing became so difficult with the visuals kicking in so fast. I remember feeling a little ill, so I grab a bucket while I can still walk. The music became so loud, I had to find the remote and decrease volume. Even doing this was a mission. And it was only just beside me. I have the remote Aand notice the music is already as low as it can go. Still seeming so loud. Anyway this is where my bad trip begins. I look down at the floor in front of me and then I look at the wall and it all became one flat surface for a second. Before spinning so fast I just felt sick and threw up, in the bucket thankfully. O and also sweating a lot! Feeling nothing but sick.

Ok so Now Iím freaked and think I may have consumed a poison lookalike mushroom by mistake. So I msg my sis saying I need you here ASAP. More typing and focusing not allowing it in? To my surprise, she showed up at amazing speed. About 8pm. And I just manage to get up to unlock the door and let her in. I tell her whatís going on, and that Iím freaking and really sick and she comforts me. Gets me my blanket and puts on different music. I just feel sick and vomit once more. My sis tells me, if you want it to stop to make myself vomit and get it all out. So I did. She reminds of trip killers I had told her little about, and did little research into myself. And I tell her to see whatís available but check internet. Because I was unable too. She comes back telling me itís just a bad trip and I had to get through it. She tells me to just let it in. But I reply with I canít itís too strong and continue to hide in my blanket.

By this stage Iím feeling a little better stopped sweating and spewing but still thinking Iím dying and a little scared of the morphing carpet. So I just hide my face in the blanket the whole time (donít think I had visuals with my eyes closed). I kept telling my sis to tell me Iím ok or check that I am. Even got her to grab a thermometer at one point to check my temp. Which was 35.1 from what I remember. Not hot like I thought I was anyway. She tries to reassure me that I am ok. But I feel like itís just her being kind. Got very emotional telling my sis I love her a lot.

About a hour or 2 pass. My world spins so fast I become incapable of talking. Luckily I had a pen and paper I had prepared earlier. Before I took the mushrooms I spoke with my mother about it. And told her to call me at 10 pm to check on me. She did. I get my sis to answer who tells her Iím ok. But then I jump in and tell her to come over to my house and bring my daughter also, who was staying with her. Maybe I just needed to feel grounded? She gets there and Iím still incapable of talking. But write on paper that Iím ok and sorry if I have scared you. They try talking to me. I can not answer in a full sentence because my world was spinning so much faster than thereís and they wouldnít understand me. So I just say one word. And then repeat it slower because I thought that even the word I said was too fast for them to understand. Then they try asking me if I still wanted them to find a trip killer. But I convince myself if I take another pill I will become stuck this way. This made me very anxious! So I write on the paper to my sis, donít drug me! And I hear her tell my mum she wonít allow it. This puts me at slight ease. And the suffering seems less. After this I lay there on the couch wondering if Iím dying or dead. Feeling my muscles in my back and feet almost spasm.

I remember hearing my sis and mother talk about brain bleeding, and convulsions etc. And thinking they were talking about me. Their conversations fade in and out. And Iím still unsure if Iím dying. My mother tells me Iíll be more comfortable in my bed and they assist me to my bed. I manage to take a smoke and then I tell my sis she canít leave yet and I love her so much. And she stays a little longer while talking to me. She tells me a story about herself. I remember just listening and her story was almost like her talking to me in the life I had left on the couch. From what I remember she had mentioned a lot of bleeding and blood and other stuff. And she was saying something about I had to get up and get in the ambulance. And it was really convincing me that I was dying! But for some reason I could still hear them trying to save me. Like when I moved from the couch to the bed I shifted timelines or entered a dream and could still hear them trying to save me in the other life/timeline. Is this ego death?? Or something else?

But then I asked my sis if she was talking about me dying? And she just laughed so hard lol. After convincing me I was ok and not dying she went home. My mother and daughter stayed the night. There was no more effects of a trip at this point just the wonder if I was in a dream or shifted timelines. And the other me died but somehow Iím still here in my bed. When I woke in the morning I could hear the birds chirping and yet still wondered if that was my family trying to call me back just for some reason they were more distant and being played in as birds. Like the confusing story my sis told me.

So the next day now and was feeling very clear. Only thing I noticed was it was like my memory was erased, but erased is the wrong word it was more put away and as I recalled a memory it was unpacked in my head. Been feeling very clear tho.

This all scared me a lot at the time. Slowly I became fine with the time line shift. Itís been 2 days since the trip. Iím fine now just confused. Hence writing this. So I guess my question is did I die and shift timelines? I have studied and know a little about people believing in multiple timelines but itís all a bit confusing also.

Exp Year: 2022ExpID: 116398
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 35
Published: Nov 23, 2022Views: 346
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Mushrooms - P. subaeruginosa (123), Cannabis (1) : Alone (16), Guides / Sitters (39), Bad Trips (6)

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