Syrian Rue & Mushrooms - P. cubensis
Citation: Cope Head. "Mushroom Entheogenesis: An Experience with Syrian Rue & Mushrooms - P. cubensis (exp2105)". Erowid.org. Jun 26, 2000. erowid.org/exp/2105
After asking for and receiving a rather potent sign, I knew it was time to journey once more into the realm of the mushroom. My room mates had conveniently vacated for the evening, I had been fasting in expectation of the sign I had asked for and when I received it, I was ready.
I started by smoking some unextracted Syrian Rue. No measurements, I just smoked it until I felt 'stoned' from it. I followed this by invocations to the 'spirits' to be kind, and not hurt me more than necessary. I wrote a quick note to my roomies, cleaned up the living room, and chewed up my caps, quickly following them with my prepowdered stems. Total mushroom weight, ~5.5 grams, dry.
I sat back to await the first effects. Within twenty minutes, I felt the first mental twinges, quickly followed by rumblings in my stomach. I sat on the couch, in the dark, watching lightning play on the walls. I began to get 'the twitches' which is usual for me on high dose mushroom/harmala combinations. These feel like colossal bolts of electricity flowing through me. If I go with them they are not unpleasant. At the one hour point, I was taking off, and decided to retire to the bathroom. The bathroom is my usual location to spend shroom trips for two reasons. First, the toilet is handy if I should need to puke (shrooms always make me nauseous) and second, it is pitch black, which I find makes my psilocybin visuals incredible.
I entered the inky darkness of the bathroom, and was immediately struck with an urge to lie down. The bathtub provides a convenient place for this I have found in the past, so into the bathtub I went. The body load was getting really heavy, and I didn't feel too hot physically. I started panting, which seemed to relieve some of my discomfort. About this time I slipped into a trance state, and things got really incredible.
From here on, temporality is merely a guess. This is all reconstruction based on the notes I wrote the next day and things I have remembered since. I probably will not be able to express more than a small percentage of this incredible experience.
Almost immediately after slipping into this trance state, I had what I think was an entity contact. I remember a distinct sense of other, and it began speaking to me, or projecting thoughts and images into my head, or both. The one distinct thing I remember is this thing telling me 'We are pleased with this agents progress' (referring to me) 'You will continue'. It made me feel good to know I had it's approval.
My visuals were beyond visuals. They truly crossed the line into visions. I know what people mean when they refer to 'vegetable TV' now. The things I saw convinced me that reality was nothing but an elaborate OEV. The things I saw had as much substance, and more beauty than the things I encountered in my day to day terrestrial existence. Everything I saw seemed to made of pure energy, or information. The closest approximation I can come up would be looking at the world under a black light, only EVERYTHING is fluorescent. I saw myself, my friends and family, the mushroom, the universe in this manner.
I had some incredible body distortions. One I remember vividly is a vision of myself as merely a head, with a single hand on top and a single foot underneath, with no body to speak of. I imagined myself twisted up, stretched out and rebuilt in a number of bizarre ways. None of these images was in any way frightening or unpleasant. They were all rather fun and amusing, in fact.
My memory seemed to be laser sharp, and also to work both forwards and backwards. I could remember events from my past and future with perfect clarity. I also experienced the Eleusisian mysteries, it seemed, which I found quite impressive. Simply by thinking about it, I could hear any piece of music I had ever heard, like I was listening to the CD. Underworld's 'Dirty Epic' was featured. I thought about trying to relive my birth, but never got around to it.
My ego death was profound, but not exactly easy. I had the usual 'I'm dying' moments, as well as what I can only describe as a few moments of existential terror. Once I got past that, I left my body on the floor, became everything and nothing, and soared through space (and time, as I mentioned). I felt like I had broken through into DM Turner's CydelikSpace, a realm of pure existence as information/energy.
Throughout most of this I felt extreme bodily discomfort. This was alleviated by panting and/or holding my body in certain positions. I got the feeling that I could alleviate this discomfort entirely with a little work, which is something I plan to explore in later trips. Sometime after the peak, my bodily discomfort disappeared entirely, and after that I felt great the rest of the night and into the next day. As I write this, four days later, I'm still glowing.
I felt a lot of very positive, loving female energy. It was personified as three women who are very important to me, and it gave me a chance to explore my feelings for them and be thankful for knowing them.
I was (and am) awed, keeled over, knocked flat by the majesty, beauty and power of this trip. The experience was magical and wonderful. I feel as though I were given a unique and priceless gift. I felt the utter joy of the universe creating itself every second. My overall feeling about the trip is entirely positive. This was my most profound psychedelic journey yet. The feeling was almost entirely religious, in a way that is head and shoulders above my other experiences. I truly manifested the divine within.
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