Baseball Bat to the Skull
Pharmahuasca (Harmala Alkaloids & 5-MeO-DMT)
Citation: Murple. "Baseball Bat to the Skull: An Experience with Pharmahuasca (Harmala Alkaloids & 5-MeO-DMT) (exp2360)". Erowid.org. Oct 8, 2000. erowid.org/exp/2360
I got home from work, after taking a capsule of about 100mg of harmala extract before leaving, and took a huge hit of 5-MeO-DMT. I took a much bigger hit than I had planned (its hard to measure milligram doses by eye). My life flashed before my eyes, and I knew I'd either killed myself or gone permanently insane. I tried focusing on the ideas of peace and love but I was too far gone for such abstract ideas. I didn't try breathing excercises because I'd lost awareness of my body. There was an intense but undefined feeling of terror. As my mind began to reassemble, I had thoughts like 'If I'm dead, what was the point of my life? I had no purpose' and 'I'm never doing drugs again!' Sometimes psychedelics give you a slap in the face if you need one - this was a baseball bat to the skull. The terror faded, but I was left with a feeling that I must find purpose, or get back to a purpose I'd strayed from. I'm quite shaken up. One of the most horrifying experiences of my life.
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.