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Breaking the Mold
Mushrooms
Citation:   JenyK. "Breaking the Mold: An Experience with Mushrooms (exp25703)". Erowid.org. Aug 3, 2020. erowid.org/exp/25703

 
DOSE:
  oral Mushrooms (plant material)
BODY WEIGHT: 130 lb
«This is the weirdest and most effecting experience of my life, It still seems quite normal to me, but since then I have not felt right. Some background on the story: I was 23 and going to a phil lesh and friends concert with my mom's boyfriend and his friend who also happened to be my landlord at the time, both cool older guys and still very into good music and letting loose every once in a while. As we left for the show they had talked about some mushrooms they had taken that evening, and I remembered some that I had kept in my fridge for about nine months, and at that in the moment thought they would be fun for the show...I have take shrooms only a few times before, and after the last I swore I would never do them again, not because I had a bad experience int he past but mainly because I knew I had already had THE best experience I could have. Anyway I popped the moldy mushies in my mouth and was ready for some fun. what happened next was not fun at all.

I got to the concert and ran into some acquaintances and we chatted. When it started to kick in I was full of nervous excited energy and siked that we had backstage passes for after the show. When the music started thats when it started to get weird- my trip was not visual at all instead it became a mind trip. The rest seems kind of hazy but I remember feeling extremely anxious, like everyone around me was part of this show but I was completely detached, and unable to relate to anyone, My cheeks were totally flushed and my mind was traveling down a path of negative thoughts. The music became excruciatingly loud in the indoor auditorium and the only way to get relief was to go wander. I decided to go to the bathroom, the light from doors opening and closing as people were coming back inside looked like a portal into life and death. I walked place a few times gripped by fear and despair.

I walked towards the bathrooms and was terrified of people knowing I was on drugs so I played sober but that made the paranoia set in even further. I was still feeling dazed and shameful when I went back to the crowd and felt like everyone was staring at me, I got back to P and V and tried to get into the music but I couldn't help but think the whole show was a farce and it was all just transparent, where the people were just out for their own self importance. I was trying my hardest to function but my mind and body seemed like they were working against each-other. We went back stage and got to meet the band- I couldn't wait to get out of there, the claustrophobia was really too much!

By the time we got home my stomach felt like it was full of nails, P said I should eat some bread but I just puked it up. Finally I was able to sleep. Mentally I haven't felt quite the same since.

Since that night I feel like I lost a piece of myself, like some part of my sense of humor is gone, where things I once found funny, I find disturbing. Also i get this weird floaty feeling when I lay down, and often will start something and forget what I'm doing. It scares me since I have always been an honor student and have plans of going to grad school.

Anyway I hope to figure out what I can do to get better, and I am still working on it, but let this be a lesson to all not to just take something without knowing what one is getting themselves into.

Exp Year: 2002ExpID: 25703
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Aug 3, 2020Views: 686
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Mushrooms (39) : General (1), Difficult Experiences (5), Festival / Lg. Crowd (24)

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