DOSE:	1 cig.	smoked	Cannabis	(plant material)
	7.0 g	oral	Mushrooms	(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

145 lb

I had always wanted to seek answers via the mushroom. Sure I had done them many times before, but I always got this nagging feeling that I was not truely expereinceing them. I was just relaxing with friends, and having a good trip with others. While I'd be on trips, I'd always think 'Imagine this by yourself, find your path, and walk it'. So on my 24th birthday, I decided to do just that.

I told my friends, some of who thought I was nutso for wanting to trip alone in nature, and others who looked at me in a new light, seeing I wanted to grow as a human. So we drove out to a beach/island. I smoked a blunt with my friends who liked marijunana. Then we injested some shrooms. I took the largest portion about 1/8th maybe. When I started to feel it come on, I asked my friends to leave me now, and that I would return hom sometime tomarrow. At this point I was here in reality on a beach with my friends.

Then they left. I realized I was -alone- for once. I was utterly alone, on an island away from everything, though I could get back to the city pretty easily. Everything vanished, I was transported out of this dimension. In the nightsky horizon I could no longer see buildings and city off in the distance. I saw mystical things, castles, and other planets. It was as though I was on an Island in the universe, and I could see everything around me. I was no longer physical, I was completely in my spirit realm.

I climbed a hill, and looked around at everything. I looked down at my watch, to see if time existed here. But mayan/aztec/ancient symbols flashed on it every second, changing. I didnt understand these symbols, but thats when I realize fully, I was completely somewhere else. I walked down from the hill and went to the one opposite. I looked around here, something didn't feel right.

I was looking for something afterall, I came for the answers, to expereince this, what was I looking for... THE PATH. I look down the hill and see a path in the dirt. I walk to the path and it is a fork. I hear a question in myself outside of myself, not really sure where, but the question 'Human or Not'. I say 'not' and begin walking down one of the paths almost automatically. Strange. I come to various forks in the road, in which I am asked questions, I answer, and begin walking down the path that represents that.

Now for some quick background on me. I don't consider myself 'male' or 'female', I also have very androgynous features as a person, and have lived my life part as a male and part as a female. At the time of this trip, I had begin moving towards my true self, of androgyny. But this trip set it in stone. At one path, I am asked the question 'male or female'. I felt as though this would decide the rest of my human life, so I should sit and think about it. I sat there, and began to laugh at myself 'What a silly thing to think about, this is a trick question, the answer is neither'.

As soon as I had that, I stood up and walked down the third fork which I didn't even see before. Walking along, I could hear the mushrooms spirits talking to me about life and spirituality. Things I can't even write here, because I'm not sure how to write them. Finnaly I say 'I want to see you'. Everything gets quiet, and still. Nothing is there. I guess I wanted the spirits to materialize and show themselves to me. At the time I didn't get the fact that THEY WERE SHOWING THEMSELVES TO ME.

They are everything. Nature is there, everything has a spirit and conscience. Thats what the quiet was showing me. I thought to myself 'There must be more, show me more'. So I just started walking, walking, walking. Oddly I saw people. Apparently I was not alone on this island. These people looked at me discontently, and ignored me. I walked more and more.

Next I was standing at what I call the 'trip crossroad'. I get this everytime I shroom now. I can choose to go totally insane, and have a nightmare trip, or I can choose the 'light path'. What I was given a choice was this. I was standing by the water, and I realized the spirits were 'water'. I realized all were spirits, everything nature was true. To the other side of me was a white trailer. In which three little identical bald men were typeing away on the computer. As I walked around this van, I knew they were monitoring me. I could feel as though everything was as scam computer program. My life, everything.

I realized, this is my paranoid delusional mind. My dark troubles, my fears, the falsehoods, lies. And the 'water/nature' was the truth. I could control which universe I lived in. The dark lies and deception, my darker demonic side. I admit, I have praticed many forms of spirituality, and I had spent alot of time focusing on negative-energy. The point of this mushroom trip was to find positive energy. A lighter side to myself, because I tend to be a dark person.

Most dark people don't want to come into the light, for some reason I wanted to try both. I had already had this 'darker' trip before long ago. I decided it was time for truth, to experience nature, to feel light. I walked away from the white trailer, and I could almost feel my darker side of insanity go 'Awwww, please come back.' as though I was letting part of myself die. However I know what happens following the darker path in life, I've been there, and experienced enough of it. This trip was to be my step into light.

By the water, I felt at one with everything. I was water, the water was me. The spirits of everything were all around. I decided to keep walking down the shoreline. I walked and walked and walked, no signs of reality existed anymore, just fog all around me. I suddenly stopped, and felt beautiful. I knew this was 'my heaven'.

There were some funny strange birds from another reality playing in the water.. These are 'my birds' I thought. They symbolize part of me. I laid on the sand, and slept. I awoke several times, each time feeling in peace. My spirit realm was eternally night time. The stars in the sky were always beaitufl. All was good and calm. I knew 'I can stay here forever'. The spirits reassured me, that If I wanted to stay, I would not have to go back to the horridly boring reality everyone faces. I could remain at 'one' with everything forever.

This sounded great, but then the spirits asked 'but have you done everything you need to do?'. And I knew the answer was no. The spirits told me 'You can come back and visit anytime you seek answers, or direction, you do not need to stay'. I knew I should not stay, there were people to influence in my life. I had 'good' to do in the world, that I had yet to do. So I got up and took 'the road to reality'. Strangly enough it was a dirt road, that stood out from the fog. Nothing around it. I walked for what seemed like days, occasionally sleeping along side this road. In my mind, time did not exist, in this realm, time has no concept. Finnaly I started seeing bits of reality show up. A trashcan here, a sign there, etc.

Then I hopped over this fence, which I knew was the fence separating realities. Suddenly I was back on the island I started on. I saw my car and walked up to it, it looked like it was speeding down the highway as I walked up to it. When I touched the door handle, I saw myself inside the car getting into a car wreak! I let go of the handle immediatly and I was standing next to the car still. I heard 'there are things to do before you go, you will be safe if you do them'. Then I realized I needed to clean up my area where I started.

Surprisingly I found this spot easily, and there was my blanket and various other things. I picked everything up. I heard the spirits say 'leave us'. and I knew it meant the remaining part of my shrooms. So I said a prayer and offered them to the earth. I buried them on what I call 'the veil between realilities'. I knew if someone ever finds them, they were meant to find them, because of where they are hidden. Inbetween worlds, on the line.

I put everything in my car, and sat down in it. I heard 'what time do you want to return?' I thought 4am sounds like a good time. So I put my fingers on 12 and 4 on my clock. Suddenly the hands started spinning around and around and around until the clock said 4am. Then BOOM, everything ended, I was shot back into my body and mind completely. Everything was as if I had not takin shrooms. The only thing that existed was an afterglow and a 'knowing' feeling very spiritual and happy.

But the spirits left, and I heard 'You will be safe driving now'. I was back to normal, just like that. It was as though I was out of space/time and I had the ability to choose when to return in. I chose 4am, and when the clock hit 4am my trip ended, just like that. I drove home, and was greated by my friends. I have told this story a few times, and reactions are always differnt.

All I know, is after this 'trip' my spiritual life has grown quiet light. I have found things in spirituality that interest me. I've had a huge spiritual growth after this trip. It gave me everything I hoped for.

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 37050
Gender: Not Specified
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Feb 21, 2007	Views: 13,080
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Mushrooms (39) : Glowing Experiences (4), Nature / Outdoors (23), Entities / Beings (37), Mystical Experiences (9), Alone (16)