Mushrooms - P. cubensis
Citation: Baron Jaspar. "Warm and Loving by Myself: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. cubensis (exp60769)". Erowid.org. Apr 8, 2018. erowid.org/exp/60769
First time with P. Cubensis alone
I had finally decided to try out my first psychedelic drug, and so I bought the mushrooms together with a friend, thinking we were going to take them at a safe place, but it turned out, that we couldn't really be anywhere, so he went home, and so did I.
I had just placed my jacket and went upstairs to my room, placing the bag with the mushrooms a safe place. I couldn't stop thinking about them. I knew it wasn't recommended to consume mushrooms alone, and especially not when I was unexperienced, but yet the thought haunted me.
In the end, I thought it wouldn't matter - it all depends on the persons state of mind. I felt positive, and wasn't afraid of the experience.
I consumed the mushrooms, and thought they didn't taste as bad as I had heard, but it was the texture of the dried mushrooms that made me gag - they were touching the back of my mouth, but I did overcome it.
I sat in my bed and watched the movie Scarface without feeling anything. After some time, I noticed that I had begun to get somewhat influenza-like symptomes (my nose was like when I'm really sick), and all of a sudden I couldn't understand what Mr. Tony Montana was saying.
His words had devolved into italian noises. I then tried to read the subtitles, but somehow, I just couldn't understand the words.
Sure, I knew the words, but they wouldn't transform into sentences, they didn't make any sense, and I then realised I was laughing hysterically. I felt a beginning of euphoria in my body, and at the same time, it felt like there was water leaking inside of my leg. Like I was a big boat, and there was water leaking in - it felt very pleasant.
The movie ended, and so I switched off the television, to sit in the small bedroom with only a lamp lid.
I turned to watch the wallpaper (the texture of my walls), and when I stared at it, I saw a weird human/robotic figure dancing, turning around itself and spinning. I was amazed at the weird figure, made out of simply geometrics. This wasn't a 'real halluciation', it was more of a combination of different geometrics.
Some time into the experience, I turned on some music. First I thought 'what's better than some Infected Mushroom??', but I caught myself thinking 'Barrh! I don't want to hear any of that evil shit!', and then turned on some very chill-out music, with a pleasant female voice.
She sounded very flirting and happy, and her voice was echoing in my head. I began to, not see, but feel a female presence - female faces laughing in my direction. Not laughing at me, but rather laughing with me - I started to giggle. In this song, there's hands clapping in the middle of it, and when they started to clap, I was clapping myself, and I saw two hands clapping in front of me, and it was sort of weird, but yet it felt warm and loving.
I got the feeling of being invited into a religious home, where the whole family were throwing this big party, with lots of woman and men playing music, and people just enjoying themselfes - showing love for one another, even though they don't know you.
After this, the effect was starting to leave me. I was still sitting in my bed, thinking about the whole thing, and then I realised, that the mushroom had been turning me inside out. 'What are you talking about'?? Well, the flue-like state of my body felt like the mushroom was growing inside my torso, my nose, my throat and my head. It wasn't unpleasant at all, it felt comfortable and warm - unlike anything I've tried.
I was still having a buzz from the experience, and I was sitting in my bed for what seemed like hours, thinking about the whole experience, the spirituality of the mushroom and, I know it sounds kliché, but the universe.
This wasn't my last experience, and I've over the time grown fond of the psychedelic mushroom. It is truely a magnificent experience, but one must respect the mushroom, and only do it, when *they feel ready for it*.
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