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River of Souls
Huasca Combo (Syrian Rue & M. tenuiflora)
by Road Scholar
Citation:   Road Scholar. "River of Souls: An Experience with Huasca Combo (Syrian Rue & M. tenuiflora) (exp63468)". Erowid.org. Nov 4, 2007. erowid.org/exp/63468

 
DOSE:
T+ 0:00
10 g oral Syrian Rue (seeds)
  T+ 0:15 24 g oral Mimosa tenuiflora (capsule)

BODY WEIGHT: 130 lb


On Friday, May 26th, 2007 I was ready to take my first dose of DMT. I had spent months researching it and gathering the necessary materials. I bought a copy of 'DMT: The Spirit Molecule', read numerous trip logs and experiences, and researched the history of ayahuasca and its impact on cultures throughout the world. After a failed attempt at extracting pure DMT from Mimosa Hostilis Rootbark powder, I decided to simply ingest the raw materials. At around 6:20, I chewed and swallowed approximately 10 grams of Syrian Rue seeds, which contain MAOI's. 15 minutes later, I took 24 grams of Mimosa hostilis Rootbark powder, handpacked into large gel caplets, about 20 in all. For 24 hours prior to taking them, I had fasted and drank only water.

About 45 minutes after taking the rootbark powder, I was feeling a mild high and slight visual distortions that did not increase in intensity. I was at my friends house (I'll call her Erin), and she had agreed to be a sitter for my trip. I sat in her room for a while listening to a Moody Blues album, and then got a call from a friend who wanted to take us out that night. I told him that would be fine, and then I went to take a shower. When I stepped into the bathroom, I noticed that things were definitely a bit off. I got undressed and turned on the water, nice and warm. I stepped under the shower and had the strangest thoughts about nature and rain and ancient forests, induced by a combination of my imagination and the DMT.

As I stood under the water, I had the overwhelming feeling that the universe was round, that round was the divine shape, and that the power of the DMT was feminine in nature and very gentle. I looked out the semi-transpaent window in the bathroom and, after a moment or two of concentration, I saw the outline of a blue being that was decidedly male. He told me to come with him. I could hear the Moody Blues playing in the room adjacent to the bathroom and among the drum beats and chords, I thought I heard a rhythmic chanting saying 'go go go go go go'. At this point, I expected the effects to intensify.

I got out of the shower, got dressed, and went back into Erin's room. I tried to explain to her why I thought the universe must be spherical, and I told her about the blue man. Then we went out onto her back porch and she smoked a cigarette while I looked out onto the water and the grass. Both were moving and swirling and waving in opposing rhythms to each other. My friend went inside to answer the phone and I sat down in a chair, looking at the rocky surface of the porch floor. I started to see millions of white, skeletal figures flowing in a sort of river of death at my feet. I moved my foot and saw that I had become part of their environment, and that my movement interrupted their paths. I had the sense that they were symbolic of souls, and I looked away and walked inside.

My friend, who was on his way to pick us up (I'll call him James), called me and asked for directions. I was completely incapable of giving them, and I had to hand the phone to Erin. I walked into her room and the entire room was awash in greens and yellows. Erin walked in after a while and everything in the room, including her, was covered in a nature-like pattern of twigs and leaves and vines. She told me to grab my stuff because James was waiting outside, and I was only able to do so with continuous prompting and help from her. I managed to walk out to his car fairly normally, though I was physically affected in a way similar to mild drunkenness. I got into the car and James started talking to me. I was unable to respond very extensively, and I told him I was tripping pretty hardcore. He said that I seemed normal to him, and I was surprised. Time seemed to take forever to pass, and the car ride, which was probably only an hour or so, seemed to last for hours and hours.

We got to his apartment and the effects were still intensifying. I walked inside and leaned against the back wall, not speaking. I began to experience acute paranoia and fear. I sat on the floor and began to trip hardcore. I kept asking Erin and James what time it was, because every minute was like an hour. I would look at one of them speaking to me but they would not be moving, I looked in the other direction only to see them speaking to me there. Rooms shifted and moved, I could look in one direction and see the bedroom and look in the other direction and see the same room. I experienced ego loss, there was no 'I'. It was like my entire body and all my senses had been liquified and poured together. I was experiencing everything simultaneously and everything was overwhelming.

I got so hot, I felt like I was going to die. I may have passed out once or twice, I remember lying there and going completely limp and thinking 'this is death'. I looked to the ceiling and saw stars, brighter and more intense than any I had ever seen. I watched the formation of a universe far off past the closest stars. I heard a baby crying in the apartment above me and I thought that I had caused it to cry. My friends got about 25 minutes of me at peak taped, and I kept running into walls and walking around and pacing. I told them that I was sorry if I destroyed the apartment, I felt inwardly that I was thrashing around and tearing down walls. Everything became overwhelming at once and I asked Erin to knock me out because I couldn't take it. I told them that I was insane, that I had finally f*cked myself up to a point of no return.

I was so afraid, I alternated between crying and heavy breathing. I fell to the floor and threw up and it felt like hands were clawing at my throat. I knew I was going to die, I wanted to die. I thought I heard sirens and screams and I pictured myself in a hospital bed with tubes down my throat and in my wrists. People were asking what I had done, what they should do. There was chaos all around me. I just let go and for a moment felt nothing at all but extreme calm and quiet. It was like the moments before you open your eyes after a restful sleep, completely tranquil and comforting. Then everything became less intense. My breathing slowed, and I sat up. I sat on the floor in the kitchen and calmed down while my friend cleaned up the vomit. I got into a state at which I could function again and attempted to tell them about it. There was no way they could understand, as neither of them had ever tripped on a psychedelic before.

I guess you could say that this was a bad trip, but I learned a lot from it. I learned what real fear and insanity was. I experienced hell, and I came back from it. I have a new outlook on life. I appreciate things more for what they are, for how beautiful they can be. I have plenty of the rootbark and syrian rue seeds left and I plan to trip again. I will have a more stable environment next time. DMT gave me one of the most profound and terrifying experiences of my entire life, and instilled even further respect in me for psychedelics and shamanistic tools.

Exp Year: 2007ExpID: 63468
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Nov 4, 2007Views: 11,933
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Huasca Combo (269), Syrian Rue (45), Mimosa tenuiflora (74) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Difficult Experiences (5), Combinations (3), First Times (2)

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