Mushrooms - P. cubensis & Cannabis
Citation: Foop. "Doug Flutie, Are You Really the Devil?: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. cubensis & Cannabis (exp67280)". Erowid.org. Apr 24, 2012. erowid.org/exp/67280
I'm writing this report a few months after this experience happened, I apologize if some of the details are just a little bit fuzzy or too broad, mainly when it comes to dosage and time taken. I also apoligize for the length, I just want to get everything down from that first night up there, for my sake, more than yours.
To offer a little context to this story; this trip took place in September of 2007 at my friend Steve's house. Me, Steve, and another friend (Bob) had been planning to 'break in' my new friends Condo up North at Lake Winnipesaukee with a one weekend bash. Obviously our plans were much more grandiose in the planning stages then when actually executed. Instead of a weekend chalk full of girls, sex, and drugs, we ended up with a 1/4 ounce of some nice outdoor cannabis, an 1/8th of some okay mid a 1/4 of some P. cubensis and just the three of us watching shitty TV and traversing every aisle of the local grocery store (that story is for another trip report, one that happened that same weekend but a different night).
This weekend was to be my first time ever taking shrooms. I have lots of experience with marijuana and alcohol, I had read alot of prep before even buying the supplies (trip reports, things to be careful, all the things you nice Erowid people provide to us 'newcomers' with certain drugs, I think I can speak for everyone when I thank each and every one of you for what you have done) so I went into this trip with what I thought was a clear head and a good mind. The plan was to drive up to Steve's condo, get set in and eat the mushrooms at around 5pm. Well, obviously, these plans did not go down the way they were supposed to. Bob was supposed to take a half eigth with me while Steve wanted to try a stem and be our sitter. Instead, Steve and Bob both copped out at the last second with me holding entirely too many mushrooms. Never being one to pressure someone taking a drug they don't want to, I left it be and started consuming my half eighth. This would be mistake number one in a long line of misteps that night, each one leading slowly down into a spiral of earth shattering revelations.
I had an entire speel planned to tell Steve and Bob when we were getting ready to ingest these magical fungi, (just remember to tell yourself it is all a trip, keep an open mind throughout, and don't fear the unknown) things like that, stuff to keep all three of us on the same level. Instead, when my two friends left me alone with these mighty things, I just completely forgot to tell them these things anyways. I thought to myself 'well they are not tripping, so why should they need to know the dangers' big mistake, I had not told them what to expect out of ME while I was tripping and that right there was the worst mistake of my life.
I injested 3.5g of the mushrooms at around 4:45pm. I was going to do 2g then gauge my reaction before taking some more but seeing all those extra mushrooms clouded my judgement. And the effects were almost immediate. I had heard that not eating anything at least 5 hours ahead of time could easily cut down on the time spent waiting for effects, but I did not expect effects so soon. I am not sure if it was a placebo effect, I don't think so, but even before I was done eating the 1/8th of mushrooms I could already see the light coming in from the balcony window start to take change and form itself into something foreign. It was shimmering, almost like when the sun is setting and hits the top of a lake even though it was covering my body (sorry for the cheese, but there is no other way of describing it).
Time and space seemed to distort right infront of me, time froze for what felt like 30 seconds before the room twisted on its point and objects started shifting. If you have ever seen one of those old western movies where they zoom in from a long range shot into a close up of the hero, it felt very similar, hard to explain. The curtains covering the balcony window were straight out of a cheap motel in Florida, brownish with multi-colored swirls, just fucking ugly. But for some reason these K-Mart special curtains held a beauty I had yet to see in my short life. The cheap adobe looking color job started to ripple, not quite the breathing effect so many people experience on these drugs, but almost as if the curtain itself had started to immitate the massive lake right outside this window, shifting and flowing right there infront of me. The hokey curtains were now more of a undulating body of water, and as I started to realize this I just wanted to walk up to them and ask them to show me there glam, there must be some sort of mystery behind this.
I needed to get some air. This comfortable, generic condo had transformed these last few minutes I spent enamored with the curtains. It went from a quiet retreat and seemed to turn sinister. The voices from the TV, the light from objects splashing against the walls and just the total sum of all the stimulating oddities in this apartment seemed to have taken on a sort of maniac grin, it is so hard to convey through words, but the apartment felt like a completely seperate entity, a living and breathing thing with evil intentions. This feeling would magnify as the night went along, not good.
I told my friends that I was going to go for a quick walk out to my car to listen to some music and not to worry about me. This part of the experience will take a little explaining of the condo complex's layout, bear with me. This condo is located right on Lake Winnipesaukee, so during the summer time it is filled with every walk of life driving up from Massachusetts and Connecticut for the week, however, during the off-season, it is a haven for all the dregs of society who lease out these would be vacation condos. From the door of Steve's condo, you walk a few feet in this open air balcony hallway that services all of the condos. from there you walk into this small enclosed room that services the stairs and does nothing but give you a few seconds respite from the harsh New England weather before having to re-enter it. You take a few flights of enclosed stairs before you open up onto the parking lot, half concealed by the complex looming just 10 feet from above. There you go, all caught up.
As I made my way to the car, each one of these seperate places took on a life of its own, just as the Condo had done. Except this time they seemed filled with good intention. The open air hallway showed me the seperation of nature and civilization, a mini ecotone right infront of me, it showed me the symbiotic relationship between the two things and my mind was just blown away. And as I made my way down to the car each one of these places widened my smile, the enclosed room servicing the stairs was my happy side, but at the same time it encompassed my sorrow, it showed me how the happiness in my life walks hand-in-hand with my loneliness, where as the condo represented my fun side, but at the same time the fury and rage that boils so closely under the surface of every human being.
I had made it to my car after having spent 20 or so minutes unlocking the secrets of the universe on the way down. I popped in the new Radiohead album and let Thom Yorke's lyrics crash over me as I watched from my driver seat. My car was parked in the perfect spot, right on the side of a busy side road perched right on the Eastern side of this massive lake, covered on two sides by looming pine tree's. It was beautiful. Nature on mushrooms is just amazing, words can not describe it. The colors were breathtaking, overblown but beautiful. Think of an HDTV, with that beautiful and crisp color/picture and multiply it by 100 and that was how I was seeing. Except the colors seemed alien. Shades and hues of every color under the sun were popping out at me and I just sat and marveled at how amazing everything looked.
I honed in on the music for a second and let it wash over me. The rythm slowly brought me up to a climax, with every nerve on my body just on fire from pleasure, and the pleasure just kept rising until it peaked, and my entire body convulsed from pleasure. Think of it as the best orgasm you have ever had but spread throughout every square inch of your body and without the messy clean up. I am not exagerating when I say that it was the greatest feeling of my life. I listened to the music for a little over an hour, climaxing every 4 minutes or so, before I made my way back up to the Condo.
I could hear the music just outside the door, echoing me inwards like a siren, to come play and lose all inhibitions, but after seeing these other rooms on my way out to my car it had left me with the knowledge that each one of these rooms represented a part of my personality, each part was a different aspect of my life personified, so I opened the door, let the sense of hysteria wash over me and subside then said under my breath 'I can conquer you.' Wrong.
Over the course of the next 2 hours me and my two friends proceeded to smoke the 3/8th's of marijuana. Don't ask me for dosage amounts and things like that because these 2 hours seemed to last forever, time seemed to slow at moments, or speed up in a matter of seconds. An hour would stretch on for days or hours compacted into minutes. My sense of all things measurements have been completely fucked, I apologize for that.
Here is where the experience goes from greatest moment of my life and turns to the worst moment. But please, after reading all the things of horrors I am about to say about this drug, please remember all the great things just above this paragraph.
At around 9pm a girl that Steve had met at college came over to the condo to watch the BC Football game (don't ask me who they were playing, it was way too long ago). I had never met this girl (let's call her Sophia) but she sounded cool so I went with the flow. We walked outside and met her in the parking lot and walked her into the Condo. She seemed pretty cool, on the way up we started some group conversation that carried us up to the apartment door. Steve fumbled with the door (can't handle small objects and holes while on alcohol, it will be his downfall). Steve and Bob walked through the door, being the gentleman I am I let the lady walk past me first, I quickly followed with a wide grin spread over my face (the biggest and goofiest 'I am on drugs' grin, yeah I know you know it) as I crossed the door frame and into the dimly light hallway, my grin slackened. 'You have not conquered me' was whispered back.
Here is where time slips and events get fuzzy, so think of this more as a contemplation on the events that happened and not so much as a recount, for even I can not remember what truely happened in these last 2 hours or what was going through my head. All I know is that the person I was no longer existed after this night, I have no ego anymore.
My eyes open, I'm sitting in a chair watching some strange sport on the TV that I have never seen (even though I played it for 11 seasons prior to this trip) How did I get from the doorway to this chair? I have no idea. What the fuck just happened? I have no idea who I am, what my name is, I did not even know that I was a human being or that I was currently on planet Earth, let alone what country I was in. Doug Flutie was on the TV telling me how amazing of a quarterback Matt Ryan is. Who is Matt Ryan? Why is this man named Doug Flutie telling me what I should think. I started to think Mr. Flutie was the gate keeper of this hell I was currently in, and from what my friends tell me, I started whispering to the TV to let me go. I can not tell you much on what I thought was going through my mind that night, memory is a tricky thing, but I can tell you that I thought I was some sort of tortured spirit. I am in no way religious either (in fact, heavily athiest and anti-religious) but I truely thought that I was some ethereal being trapped in a spirit world, some sort of purgatory, I just wanted it to end. The idea that I was subjected to this pain for the rest of eternity raced through my mind for what seemed like ages. Who were these people next to me? What do they want with me? and What am I doing here? I just wanted to escape from this room but could not even muster the strength to get up. The room had pervaded me on every level. I had mistreated these special drugs and I was to pay.
That experience lasted for about the duration of the trip until I just suddenly snapped out of it and recalled everything. Who I was, where I was and what I was all came back to me. It was like a light being turned on. I still felt some come down effects but all thoughts of spirit worlds and what not was out of my head. I would spend the next few days thinking back on this night and trying to figure it out, how these drugs took me to the best place in my life, straight into the worst then right back out the other end in 1 night. I will not share what I figured out during that period of time conteplating and trying to find meaning because that is for me and me only.
The second I woke up after this night, I took the remaining shrooms and had a simply amazing all-visuals trip. Now, after this trip, I have taken mushrooms about 15 more times in varying doses and have yet to even get near a bad trip, all have been mind alteringly amazing and have shown me things about me as a person that have truely helped me change into a better and more insightful person.
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