DOSE:	10 mg		Amphetamines
	1 g		Piracetam
		oral	Tea	(tea)
	5 mg	vaporized	DMT	(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

150 lb

Revelation

I'm at a point in my life where My toxicity is probably at its lowest; marijuana being the main toxin in question, though alcohol and tobacco make their appearances on the scene often enough. I get home from a long taxing day at work; though I've been walking the line, sharp as a katana due to a 10 mg Adderrall and about 1g of piracetam green tea cocktail earlier in the afternoon. This low toxicity is inevitably due to dmt, mushrooms, and lsd which continually lead me through the limelight of My own confusing consciousness.

I settle myself and view my schedule for school which I've just settled and feel decidedly pressured like there is something I need to do. Well I decide to DO, and what I do is, well, look at porn on the internet. I burrow down, disconnect myself, and unconsciously revel in my manhood browsing through the myriad pictures, my lust now insatiable(I can look at this rot to My heart's abandon and feel unphased, untouched b/c of the emotional disassociation that, I, as a male am capable of).

This is all a facade, I'm disgusted with myself, the more so because I have a girlfriend. The porn is destroying My last vestige of honor, of courage, of wholeness. It's true what Jesus said about committing sins (unsavory actions) in the heart; it is the same as committing them in the flesh.

I masturbate finally and climax, with a despicable vision in My mind at the final moment. I recover, come to, begin to realize My folly and vaporize the dmt in an oil burner (high quality thrice recrystallized dmt). It is as this point that I realize My sick fascination with My male faculties and its inherent ability to disconnect me from My emotions. I see the facade, I see my girlfriend, who I am now psychically clutching after with all of my will. My will is now gripping, realzing that this rot will drive me to death, makes me wish my death for the first time ever, so that this eternal self imposed trial will just end. This harrowing objective truth is ripping me to shreds and yet it is setting me free. The dmt is cleansing My mind, My kidneys (I often feel this), My brain, My being. No the dmt just feels like it is doing this. No, wait, the dmt is doing this! The thousand petaled lotus begins its reintegration with my shell. My cosmic kaleidoscopic multi-lens telescope is closing up and I can no longer peer into the infinite recesses of the cosmos (though this particular trip has been overshadowed by the vision of My own being); the window is still open because I am being peeked at, therefore I too can still peek. The storm breaks, the clouds then settle, the sun begins its ascent in the east. YHVH, all permutations are one. Resist the Beast, rebel against the tyrant, Kali is a merciless goddess. I Respect Shiva, I will invoke the Kwisatz Haderach.

Exp Year: 2008	ExpID: 73476
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Feb 27, 2018	Views: 864
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DMT (18) : General (1), Sex Discussion (14), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Alone (16)