Mushrooms - P. cubensis
Citation: gungfucuddler. "Light and Beautiful: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. cubensis (exp77804)". Erowid.org. Jun 18, 2020. erowid.org/exp/77804
In preparation for this experience my girlfriend and I had selected five albums to listen to and three movies to watch. Purchased ingredients to make a masaman curry for dinner and some 3D chalk to play with when the mushrooms began to take effect. Some fire logs for if we felt like spending some of the evening outside, living in a rural area we are free of light pollution so we are free to gaze at the stars without out a haze of light blocking the sky but inversely we are also left in pitch back.
We had both gotten off of work that day at six, very stressful jobs in the social services industry. By the time we had gotten home most of the stresses were gone from our minds and we were in a fairly cool mindset. I measured out .7 grams for my girlfriend and 1.4 grams for myself. We were taking a Thai strain that I had been growing for the last few months and this was our first time experiencing them.
At 7pm we diced up our mushrooms and mixed them with apple sauce and ate them quickly. We then went to lay down in bed so that we could allow the effects to wash over us. We began watching The Heartbreak Kid to pass some time until our night began.
After about 30min I began to feel nauseous, light, and my sense of balance was about a bubble and a half off. At about 7:45 the nausea became so severe that I contemplated hanging out in the bathroom because of my fear of vomiting in the bed so I smoked some of the devils lettuce, cannabis, and lay back down to let the nausea dissipate. By 7:55 I realized that I was feeling a buzzing through my body, as if I was a conduit for an electrical euphoria. By 8:00 I was watching what seemed like a 3D movie of a renaissance ball inside my mind. It would periodically zoom out of the ball, as if I was being sucked into space but instead of zooming out to see the world I was zooming out to see the world transform into fractals and then zoom back into the ball. While I was experiencing this I continued to open and close my eyes, to re-establish reality. At this time my girlfriend was doing homework on her laptop and saying how she was not feeling anything and did not think she would be trying mushrooms again because it was no fun.
At 8:30, I decided to get up and get a glass of juice. As I got up and walked to my bedroom door and opened it I realized how beautiful the world was. The light from my living room seemed to illuminate the world and coat it in a crystalline liquid. As I looked down at my hands, while pouring juice, I realized how foreign my body seemed to me and how intricate the human body was and how fantastic it was that it worked the way it did. At this realization I began to laugh uncontrollably at the pure joy and beauty of life. I can only explain the way the world look as a movie or a soap opera, the way in a movie one thing is in the foreground and perfectly clear and the rest is in the background, that is how the world looked to me. When I turned to return the juice to the fridge I spotted the clock on my way and became overjoyed at the fact that it was only 8:30 and that I had at least four more hours of this wonderful experience. Upon returning to the bedroom my girlfriend told me she thought she was feeling something. We sat and watched The Heartbreak Kid for a little longer until we decided to go outside and play with the 3D chalk I bought. Playing with chalk made me feel like a child again, by this time I believe that my girlfriend's mushrooms had kicked in completely. We joked and drew and it felt like it did before I had grown up and learned that loved ones die and that people betray you and that there are things in the world that I don’t want to happen. There was nothing but fun, until I saw a palm tree swaying in a large gust of wind and could have sworn it was a person walking up to the lanai door. I started to get anxious and concerned for my girlfriend’s safety. I knew there was no one outside because we live out in the middle of nowhere but I was still worried, irrational fear and such.
I calmed down a little after a few minutes and then we decided to go out to our back yard and look up at the stars. We stayed outside for what seemed like hours staring at the sky, at first I became worried about someone coming to get us because of earlier but after I told myself that if someone comes they come and if they don’t they don’t but there is nothing I can do to change that I became calmer and more content and accepting and could enjoy watching the world around me unfold to my eyes.
When we came back inside we decided to lay back down and watch the rest of The Heartbreak Kid but after what seemed like hours of a movie I was not able to comprehend at the time I asked my girlfriend if we could finish it tomorrow and watch something that involved less concentration. When she changed the channel she looked at the clock saying “Oh My God, it is only 9:23?!” We both reveled in the fact that we had believed that we had spent hours outside playing with chalk and star gazing but that it had been mere moments in comparison. While watching TV I kept looking over at my girlfriend and realized over and over how amazingly gorgeous she was and how lucky I felt that the world had worked out the way it did so that I could end up with her. We made out for a nice portion of what was left of the night and cuddled. I remember feeling so connected to her as if the skin the separated us was actually connecting us together and that if we could stay in this moment forever we would exist as one person with two minds. After a while we settled down and as time played on my mind passed in and out of the outside world and the world in my head. I cannot truly tell you the amounts of time I was lucid to the world around me and the amount of time I was dwelling in the patterns and play in my heads. What I do remember clearly is how pronounced the TV in our bedroom looked and how it cut through the darkness all around it and how beautiful I thought it was to see the light cut through the dark.
The next day we took our puppy out for a walk in the morning and everything just seemed nice. Not in the narcotic euphoric nice sort of way but in a clean, clear, sort of way. I realized that we did not watch any of the movies we picked out, listen to any of the music we picked, make curry for dinner or start our fire to stay outside. The only thing we used that we had setup for this experience was the 3D chalk. I chuckled and realized how wonderful the night was even though it did not happen at all how I planned it. In retrospect I realize how much I love so many things that are important to me, how much I cannot change the world and how beautiful of an experience this was and how much joy it brought me to share this with the woman I love.
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