Being Reborn
Mushrooms & Syrian Rue
Citation:   HexagonSun. "Being Reborn: An Experience with Mushrooms & Syrian Rue (exp81480)". Oct 12, 2018.

T+ 0:00
4 g oral Syrian Rue (seeds)
  T+ 0:20 4 g oral Mushrooms (dried)
Last night I took 4g of dried field shrooms with 4g of syrian rue. I munched on the syrian rue before swallowing it with orange juice, approximately 20mins before I took the mushrooms, which I ate with peanut butter.

I can't tell you how long the come up was, only that two hours after dosing I was completely incoherent. For a period of time, I went completely insane. Thoughts were flying through my head and I couldn't see or think about what was happening around me. I felt like I've heard schizophrenia described. The visuals were some of the strongest I have ever experienced. I sat outside as the sun set, and the smallest cluster of clouds were covered in light while the rain-filled ones around the cluster closed in. I watched the cloud-bodies of gods and goddesses twisting and thrusting around, miles and miles away, in a beautiful dance.

The insanity passed for some time, and I talked with friends for an hour or two. I gravitated between oneness with these people and mental isolation.
The insanity passed for some time, and I talked with friends for an hour or two. I gravitated between oneness with these people and mental isolation.
I saw their thoughts and intentions, and how they reflected on me. As I realized my similarities with these people, I also knew how they reflected different parts of me. It sounds like such a trippy thing to say, but those around me were manifestations of my feelings, of myself. The hallucinations continued; I would feel like the bed I was in was made of liquid, the floor was a spinning sea, etc.

What shocked me so much about this trip was the faces. They were everywhere. My roomate's black shag rug was a mass of bodies, the speckled walls of my bathroom were curious crowds.

I went with my friends to another group of people I didn't know as well. I steadily grew repulsed with the people around me, who I wasn't friends with, and I saw clearly their social constructions and how completely false and useless they were. Their voices sounded like gibberish, and the way they stood and acted seemed so worldly. I returned to my dorm, turned the lights off, and tore away my conception of 'self' to its most basic form. After those few minutes, I became perfectly comfortable with who I was, and realized how useless action and intentions are. For a long time, several hours, I became totally neutral. I had no desire or real feeling. For a time I believe I was totally enlightened.

Slowly my normal human feelings returned to me. This happened steadily during the comedown. My friends dragged me along to a movie theatre and I didn't care enough to get shoes. I was stopped on the way in by a rent-a-cop and there was a bit of a scene as he had me talk to the manager because I wouldn't be allowed in. At that time I saw all sides of the situation, everyone's thoughts and feelings. I was not tripping at this point. I was completely unbothered by what was happening and had no problem with sitting in the car while my friends watched the show. I was totally content.

Things ended up working out but I left early because I was feeling sick. After I returned to the college I went through a period of total depression and cynicism as I thought about how horrible humanity as a species is. I won't bother with details in that area, but the weight of reality returning to me after my enlightenment was absolutely crushing
the weight of reality returning to me after my enlightenment was absolutely crushing
. I realized afterward what was happening to me during the comedown: I was returning to my normal form. I was essentially reborn from a featureless creature to an earthly being, with my normal thoughts, feelings, and opinions. I was then capable of being annoyed, hurt, bored, etc. That's why I couldn't call this a bad trip. I was back to normal, after reaching nirvana. I had true mental peace for several hours, and I felt it slip away. Am I sad I lost it? I suppose. But now I know what it is like to look into myself and see the machinery in my mind, to see what it is like to feel nothing at all and not be bothered by it.

The bottom line is that I had taken a much larger amount of these exact shrooms several weeks before and had hardly tripped. I am fairly experienced with psychedelics and I have no doubt that I had a level four trip, bordering on a level five, last night. It lasted around 6 hours. I do not know how much of the effect was from the syrian rue, but if the previous week was any indication, it multiplied the intensity of the shrooms 4-5x. I am not the same person I was yesterday.

Please be cautious with this combination. If I had been less experienced I would have freaked out. I nearly did.

Exp Year: 2009ExpID: 81480
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 19
Published: Oct 12, 2018Views: 1,058
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Mushrooms (39), Syrian Rue (45) : Combinations (3), Various (28)

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