DOSE: T+ 0:00	1.5 g	oral	Mushrooms
T+ 0:30	1 cig.	smoked	Tobacco - Cigarettes
T+ 0:40		oral	Mushrooms
T+ 0:00	1 cig.	smoked	Tobacco - Cigarettes

BODY WEIGHT:

210 lb

Ate dinner about 6:15 PM. Read “DMT The Spirit Molecule” by Dr. Rick Strassman for a few hours. Had been told by supplier that these were very potent and that I should start with just a stem and a cap. Took about 1.5 dried grams at 9:55 PM. I set one smaller cap and stem on top of my clock as my “additional option.” Sat on bed and meditated. Song ended and I sat in silence for about thirty minutes. Began to feel the effects. Instinctively felt like I hadn’t taken enough and began contemplating more even as the feeling was just starting to rise within me. I was a bit nervous, of course, but I kept telling myself, “All you do is prepare for these moments.”

Opened my bedroom window to smoke a cigarette. Turned on a recording of The Magic Flute by Mozart. This opera was very, very funny to me and I began to cackle hysterically at the cadence and style of the singing. The weather was really volatile outside. Huge gusts of wind and relentless sheets of rain. I tried to not think of the weather as angry or unpleasant. In turn, it took on a very beautiful connotation for the majority of the trip. At some points it was as if I was conducting the weather like it itself was an opera. I began to feel completely euphoric and experience the tell-tale sign of my chest opening up letting “light shine in and out of it.” On top of the hill where I live drive by traffic is not unusual but also not frequent. I began to think about the possibility of summoning someone to my house with just my mind. Thought about this for about 10 minutes. Next, a car pulled up behind my roommate’s car. They kept the car running, the headlights on, and turned on the interior light. The car just sat there. “Did I make this car appear? What are they doing here?” The driver never got out of the car. In fact, the driver appeared to be staring up directly at me through my window. “Surely if I keep gazing at the driver this will reveal itself to be a coincidence or a visual illusion.” Nope. In fact, the driver’s gaze became more intense and certain. I got the feeling I had indeed summoned this car here with my mind. The face of the driver was hard to make out. Male or female? Friendly or angry? I couldn’t stand any more conjecture or visual contact with this person any longer and I closed my window shade. Moments later I heard the car drive off. Oh-Kay….

I believe around this time I ate the “additional option.” I got comfortable on my bed and began to hallucinate. When I was younger my extended family would often rent a few houses in the same beach neighborhood during the summer. To me it seemed like we temporarily owned the entire neighborhood. Everyone ate meals communally and all of the kids played games of Hide & Seek that would last all night and stretch across entire blocks of back yards. I think it was the most compound-like living situation I’ve ever been a part of. This neighborhood appeared to me (visually, right in front of my face) and I recalled very fond memories. Next, above the houses of this neighborhood appeared a crisscross of giant guitars in the sky. I was told that the songs I had made up were as real as the houses below. The effects were building and I felt more and more engulfed with a feeling of deep peace, love, and comfort.

I sort of “came to” from this hallucination and said, “Wow.” I got up to go take a piss. When I left the bathroom I came upon my cat and she startled me. The startling feeling reminded me (for some reason) that this whole experience was some strange cousin to intense fevers I had when I was a kid and would hallucinate. I felt I could stand a lot more of this (even if I hadn’t reached the peak of my current dose) and I ate another medium size cap from the bag under my bed. I opened my blinds and window again and smoked another cigarette. The Magic Flute had long stopped playing on my stereo but I kept hearing echoes of it seemingly coming from far down my street. “So,” a voice said in my head, “we’re here to decide if you get to keep your muse.” This was an alarming turn of events but I remained calm. During this “trial” I had to come to terms with what it would be like if I couldn’t write songs anymore. It was very intense and important! The outcome, actually, was uncertain. I felt very old. My soul. I felt like an ancient gnarled, tree-figure in the woods. If I closed my eyes I continued to “see” my surroundings but they would suddenly appear in a style like Van Gogh’s “Starry Night.” My cat came into the room and walked right up on my lap. She smelled my third eye and stared at me intently. I told her she was very beautiful and a good friend. Her fur’s color pattern seemed to suggest to me she was wearing some kind of super hero costume. I remember thinking “what if I could experience this with a lover? Wouldn’t that be amazing?!” Never have.

I closed the window again and laid back down on the bed. I closed my eyes and saw a deep, underground nest of roots and tree branches. Deep inside this twisted nest I could see a bright yellow light source. An eye? A flashlight? As it got closer this light source seemed to turn green and suddenly I was face to face with some kind of “other” intelligence/being. It looked kind of praying mantis actually. It said nothing. It was interested in me and vice versa. It got very close to my face. I couldn’t tell what the hell this thing was. Good? Bad? Human? Alien? No idea. I could only suss out that it was “aware.”

This was essentially the last hallucination of the evening. For the rest of the night I stretched and moved my body all around while making odd vocal sounds watching the storm outside.

I had a difficult moment late into the trip when I heard my room mate argue with someone on the phone. This disturbed me and my thoughts went pessimistic and dark for awhile. Hard to overcome but I did. At about 2 AM, when I was coming down, I put on the movie “The Men Who Stare At Goats” which was fantastic and pretty ideal to watch at the end of a trip.

The next day I was extremely, extremely tired and slept most of the day and night. Today I feel pretty good but still a bit tired. I think it took a lot out of me.

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 84388
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: Apr 21, 2020	Views: 1,279
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