DOSE: T+ 0:00	repeated	oral	Caffeine
T+ 0:00	9 capsls	oral	Mushrooms	(dried)
T+ 2:45	0.5 tablets	oral	MDMA
T+ 3:30		smoked	Cannabis
T+ 6:45		smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

110 lb

My first thought was, 'wow, those are small.' I was immediately reminded of the 'little, yellow, different' ad campaign of my youth. Only these were white. Still, surprisingly tiny.

My second thought was that I was buying bunk. Because no one just walks up to you (er...me) and asks if you want to buy some rolls. It just doesn't happen. At least it had never happened to me, which is why this would end up being my first time experiencing the long-anticipated MDMA.

The thing was, I was already tripping. I'd taken nine size 0 capsules of mushroom powder about three hours beforehand, and had just gotten over that unpleasant feeling and coming up into a comfortable trip space (I find the capsules add another hour to the come-up). I'd had a strong experience with ten and was shooting for something similar, but suspected that this second batch was much less potent than the first. Either that, or I'm becoming psilocybin-tolerant (I had last taken them five days before, and previous to that, maybe three weeks [going in a similar pattern for the last six months]).

It had been an uncomfortable come-up, as they all seem to be. 'Weird' is really the only way to describe that feeling of entering mushroom land. I find that I became very internalized, the people and things surrounding me becoming less influential as I talk myself through the process. My tummy rumbled and I popped a stick of gum in my mouth, not particularly wanting that strange rubberyness, but needing something to soften the jaw clenching.

And, for the second time in as many months, I found that I had to leave the area I was in because Infected Mushroom's music was too aggressive and overwhelming for a come-up. I find it ironic that I've had to flee from a pro-mushroom group twice because their music just didn't work with the sensations.

This was all happening right outside the LA Memorial Coliseum at Electric Daisy Carnival, a touring summer rave event. I'm not a raver, per se, but I do like attending music festivals as a backdrop for my psychedelic adventures, and I've come to find that dance music serves as a great trip soundtrack.

So it was about 10:45 on a Friday night in June, 2010, and I was standing by my old friend Cubatron, enjoying its soft glowing spheres as the colors shifted and wiggled, when a guy approached and asked me something I didn't understand. 'What?'

'I’ve got quads. Pokeballs.'

Holy jeez, I was being offered the opportunity to buy ecstasy!

'How much?'

'$10.'

I had a twenty in my pocket, ready to go. Because while I'd seen deals go down, I was far too terrified to actually approach someone myself. This was something I'd been hoping would one day happen. 'I'll take two.'

The two teensy, light-as-air pills were in my palm, and my $20 was in his hand.

(In a somewhat amusing side continuation of that, he then asked if I wanted to give him my phone number, to which I, in my psychedelic state, said, 'why would I want to do that?' thinking I was being set-up for something. 'I'm a good connect and always have pills,' was his answer, but the newness/strangeness of it still left me thinking I'd come out of the deal with a couple of sugar pills and a wake-up call from the police awaiting me in the morning.)

I lurched away from the light installment and headed for one of the stages, fingering the pills (more like pellets) in my pocket. For a moment, I considered saving them for later. But I also thought this would be one of the best times/places to first feel the effects. 'Tonight's the night,' is what I told myself.

Tripping though I might have been, I decided to err on the safe side and only eat half of a pill. I had never done the stuff before and didn't know what to expect. Plus, I was already in an altered state. And I had to be at work in...seven hours.

So, 'erring on the safe side', I chewed half a pill and downed the bitter powder with water.

It's 11 PM at this point. I last ate at 5:30. I swallowed the shroom capsules around 8:15 and started having a positive, visually psychedelic experience around 10:15. The trip itself wasn't as strong as I had hoped/expected, but I will say that I sometimes find it difficult to gauge trip strength in the dark. I was in a wonderfully psychedelic state of mind, however, feeling fully comfortable within my own skin and not being bothered by a single thing or other person in the world (which is really the effect I'm hoping for when I take these things).

I headed over to Moby and consulted my phone to judge how strong the trip was (not like I have a psychic connection to it, I just find that the glowing numbers and letters can tell me a lot about what my level is, based on how much they’re moving about and distorting). Things were glowing quite nicely and I was beginning to feel quite good, but other visual elements were limited (no distortion, not much movement, no shadowing). Ah well. Still felt wonderful to find a place in the crowd, put on my sunglasses, and move to the music.

After half an hour or so, I decided to head over to the Coliseum itself, where I would remain for the rest of the night. I wanted to take a seat and watch the lightshow coming from the enormous stage, hoping it would become visually interesting for me, thinking perhaps that I would be able to peak while watching a writhing sea of people moving to the trance beats.

I enjoy walking while tripping. It's an interesting activity. My legs feel like some rubbery extension of my traveling self, and I sense myself more like a passenger in my body. I notice things like how much my head moves up and down as I shift weight from leg to leg. Everything looks so interesting, and I'm much more aware of my surroundings. I don't hang my head or wish I was invisible. I just don't care about what people might be thinking about me, as I admit they probably aren't thinking a damn thing about me, and won't likely ever have contact with me again. It’s a state of mind I wish I could be in more often (something I'm working on).

I wasn't sure if I was feeling the ecstasy yet or not. I did feel quite good, but mushrooms typically make me feel quite good (once they get over making me feel quite bad). It was about 45 minutes since I'd had that half pellet, but I couldn't remember for the life of me how long the come-up was supposed to take. I was also somewhat afraid of what the adulterant in the pill could possibly be, as caffeine was the only other stimulant I'd ever had. I tried to search for a pill report on my phone, but it didn't have enough memory to open the webpage. I did search once I got home and found that the white pokeballs (imagine an accent mark over that 'e'; it's a Pokemon thing) going around SoCal are MDMA and caffeine.

I took a seat in the stands of the Coliseum and relaxed for a bit. I was somewhat disappointed to find that my visuals weren't very psychedelic at all. I knew that hippie flipping was a common combination, but I assumed that meant that the two components complemented each other without detraction. But reading up on it, it seems that MDMA has a tendency to strip the visuals from a mushroom trip, which I think now is what happened. Not knowing this at the time, I figured my mushroom trip had peaked weakly and early and was dying quickly for whatever potency or dosage issue I might have had. So I dug out my chillum and smoked pot (I'd been taking a hit here and there since 3:00 in the afternoon or so, though I stopped once I'd begun tripping and didn't start back up again until this point), hoping to bring back the visuals. There was a slight increase in glow intensity, but not much more. The pot had little other effect on me, which I figured was my tolerance telling me that it's time to take a break again.

Everyone around me was sitting down, nodding their heads to the beat or just relaxing. I decided that I wanted to be where the fun people were, hoping to feed off of some happy vibes. It was nearing midnight, and I wanted to move, despite the fact that I'd been up since 6:00 AM and had already worked six hours at my physically demanding job. Perhaps this is relevant, perhaps not, but in anticipation of the evening, I'd been drinking coffee and energy drinks, and I typically have caffeine only once a week because of how it can keep me up.

Anyway, I navigated the crowded aisles to the lower section. My rule at raves: follow the glowsticks. They look great when I'm tripping, and they're usually being worn by people having a really good time. Kaskade was DJing at this point, and I was enjoying the visuals, but beginning to anticipate Deadmau5 far too much (I'd chosen to see PiL at Coachella instead and gathered that I missed an amazing show).

I smoked more pot, but admitted that it wasn't bringing back the trip. And I wasn't feeling high, anyway. The set ended and everyone jostled for a good place. I had all the confidence in the world (which I never do) and jumped onto a vacant seat that I knew was reserved for someone. After assuring the reserver that I'd vacate it should the reservee want it back, I got down to the business of rocking out to Deadmau5.

It was after 1 AM at this point, and I didn't know if I was feeling mushrooms or ecstasy or marijuana or caffeine or just the energy of the moment , but I was having an amazing time. I was moving like I haven't moved before, which is saying something, considering the instability of the folding stadium seat I was dancing on. I'd put my sweatshirt on when the sun was still out because I thought it was too cold, but I barely noticed the temperature at all. I drank from my water bottle from time to time, never necessarily feeling thirsty, but knowing that I should. I got into the music. It wasn't my favorite, but I began to like it more and more as I lost myself to the beats and the on-screen visuals.

I didn't feel tired. Not even a little bit. Mushrooms make me yawn, but I wasn't even doing that. I was just moving my feet and throwing my hands in the air, wanting the night to go on and on. From experience, I knew the psilocybin must've been pretty much exhausted by this point, but I didn't have the come-down headache that it usually gives me. No part of me felt achy or sore or tired.

I could've gone on and on, but the show could not. At 2:00 exactly, it was over and we all had to leave.

Felt great on the walk back to the car. Some kids were asking if anyone needed to buy any more rolls, and I thought about it before telling myself that having a pill and a half left was enough. (I tend to be a hoarder when it comes to things I like that I have limited access to.)

Got back to the car feeling awake and alert, and quite wonderful. I wasn't tripping at this point, wasn't high. Just feeling very awake. Like I would after an energy drink, but without the jitters or nausea. I was furiously chewing on the gum that I'd had in my mouth for the past six hours. Finally spit that out and munched some pretzels I'd brought along, though I wasn't particularly hungry for them. I just knew I hadn't eaten in nine hours and had been burning a lot of calories.

I took surface streets home, not wanting to bother with finding the freeway. I drove a way I'd never been before and was worried that I'd end up lost and get home even later, missing out on highly valuable sleep time, but I assured myself that I knew the area well enough to get home just fine, and went with it. Felt really good driving, too. It was a cold night, but my window was down and I was loving the rushing wind. I followed the speed limit exactly and nodded my head to some Chemical Brothers, wishing I could still be dancing to live music at the festival.

Finally got home around 3:00 AM (gotta get up for work in 3 1/2 hours), feeling very, very speedy. First thing I did was pack a bowl with the best indica I had, melted some hash on top of that, and smoked away. That's when I realized that I couldn't feel the effects of marijuana while on MDMA. At all. I didn't feel anything from the weed. Normally my eyelids would be drooping shut with a bowl like that, but they didn't even feel dry. Wow.

And I was rolling. Feeling intense body euphoria, perhaps comparable to the most intense euphoria weed has given me (just three or four times in eighteen months of smoking multiple times daily). I thought about how poorly timed this was, but how I knew better for next time. I could not settle down for the life of me. I dealt with all of these little tasks that could've waited for later. I also found that I was having slight visual effects, after all, and spent some time watching the letters in my iTunes library jitter to the bass, as if they were actually physical objects being shaken by the deep resonances. The thing is, iTunes wasn't even playing music. Fat beats were being dropped in my head, yo. I found it amusing that the letters were grooving to my imagined music.

Weed failing me, I decided to try meditation. Knowing about MDMA's connection with psychotherapy, I decided to listen to one of my hypnotherapy (essentially guided meditation) sessions. And I tried to stay with it, but it was very difficult. My mind was everywhere and I couldn't keep my jaw relaxed without making a conscious effort. But I was beginning to feel more tired. I had passed the peak and was now coming down. Whatever that was going to mean.

I tried music and TV, but for once in my life, the only way I could fall asleep was without any external stimulation. Eventually, I managed it.

Woke up a couple of hours later to the sound of my alarm. My skin and shirt were sweaty. While I didn't feel nearly as tired as I'd expected, I did feel a bit nauseous. I'd been planning on buying a coffee to keep me going, but upon realizing that I didn't need it and that the sound of it actually sounded rather disgusting, I understandably opted out.

After a couple of hours of zombie nausea, I started to feel much better. I was largely back to normal by the time I got off of my shift, thinking that I should be tired more than feeling that I was.

I was hoping to sleep as soon as I got home, so I once more turned to cannabis, which once more had absolutely no effect on me whatsoever, aside from perhaps ridding me of remaining nausea and getting me wanting to eat, which I haven't really been (despite feeling hunger). I didn't realize that weed and x were so incompatible, especially given how much wacky tobaccy there is at these events, but I guess not everyone's rolling.

I eventually dozed off and on for a couple of hours, before I had to get ready to go back to work.

It's nearing ten the night after. Four hours of sleep in the past forty hours and still not feeling very tired. Only have one more shift before my weekend, and I'm hoping that the crash doesn't come before it's over. Smoked a couple of bowls, a bowl with hash, and a blunt in about a half hour timespan and still don't feel it. Maybe this is the excuse I needed to take a break, but I'm quite curious to know when this particular aspect is going to end.

As for hippie flipping, I don't know that I'd bother doing it again. I don't see the point of ending the visuals, especially when mushrooms already give me body euphoria. I will say that I felt less 'drugged' by having the additional drug in my system (less mushroom weirdness, that is, but also less mushroom coolness). I do think taking MDMA toward the end of a trip could be something to do in the future. Then there's no mushroom comedown to worry about, and the euphoric feeling can be extended. It would be a nice shot of energy, too. I'm just not so sure I see the point of taking them concurrently, now that I've done it.

Then again, I've yet to take ecstasy on its own, so perhaps I'll understand better what it specifically brought to the night once I've done that.

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 86074
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 28
Published: May 5, 2019	Views: 2,823
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Mushrooms (39), MDMA (3) : Rave / Dance Event (18), Combinations (3)